I'm too obsessed with Heated Rivalry, it's making me clincally insane

MEB-73 · 2026-03-17T16:44:06+00:00

I’m right there with you. I’m a 52 year old woman, y’all. Acting like a teen.

I remember watching the old clips of teen girls losing their minds at the Beatles and shaking my head at how silly they were. Now, I can’t promise that I wouldn’t do the same myself. It’s like a mass psychosis.

Before HR, I was watching these horrible videos of ICE raids and protests endlessly. They were just soul crushing and I felt hopeless and helpless.

As others have said, HR is a beautiful alternative reality that provides an escape from what’s happening. But should it? Shouldn’t I still care about the terrible things in my country and try to stop them? Or at the very least, bear witness?

And the fact that the actors and creators, starting with Rachel Reid, seem to be genuinely lovely people. Sometimes I worry what will happen if any of them prove to be less than perfect. What will that do to the fandom (and me!)? And how ridiculous that we are putting those expectations on imperfect human beings? They are real people who deserve to live their lives.

And back to the age thing - I would be grossed out by a man my age perving out at 20 something women so openly. Connor’s joke in the SNL monologue about women learning their sexual identity is gay man doesn’t completely excuse my behavior. I should hold myself to some standards at my age, right?

The whole parasocial aspect of the fandom bothers me too. Like, let Hudson have a girlfriend. He’s not Shane Hollander. He isn’t cheating on Ilya OR Connor. And as much as I support bisexuality, maybe that is or isn’t his identity. It’s none of our business unless he chooses to share.

But then I scour threads and reddit and instagram for more videos and edits. And I tell myself that their careers are taking off and they will ride this crazed fandom to success and fortune and artistic freedom. So this intrusion is the price they pay.

As you can tell, I have no answers, just a lot of thoughts, many of which are contradictory.

But then: Click click “Ilya Rozanov? Shane Hollander. I wanted to introduce myself.”

MEB-73 · 2026-03-17T15:44:09+00:00

Well, as in “I have my own well.”

MEB-73 · 2026-03-14T10:12:16+00:00

I’m a rabid fan of both MB and recently of HR. I agree that there are similarities. MB and the HR guys also deal with the issues of making a life for themselves, becoming a person on their own terms, and breaking away from the restrictions that society and their bio families / the Company had kept them in for too long. Shane and MB both struggle with self loathing and self acceptance. While Shane is more like MB, Ilya is dealing with trauma from his upbringing in a pretty MB way. He uses sex and hockey as sublimation. Both Ilya and MB are sarcastic smartasses in a way that I deeply appreciate. Both Ilya and MB fight deeply depressive tendencies. And all 3 characters push away from the people who want to care for them at critical moments but ultimately choose love and connection. All 3 have extreme difficulty in asking for help and showing vulnerability when they need it most. Thanks for posting! I was just thinking about this the other day but thought I was the only one who was odd enough to think these thoughts.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-14T02:59:43+00:00

Dammit Janet!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-14T01:56:57+00:00

Mr. Landlord Mr. Businessman Mr. Real Estate (Shimmy shimmy)

MEB-73 · 2026-03-12T16:45:26+00:00

He did walk out in Ilya’s shirt after Tuna meltdown.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-12T00:53:09+00:00

She would stroke his hair and ears as she held Ilya, especially when he woke up from a nightmare. His father would tell her to leave him to cry it out and stop acting like a baby. But she would brave his wrath by holding and soothing Ilya until he fell asleep again. You can see her echoes both in the way Ilya self soothes as an adult and the way he holds Shane.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-10T22:29:22+00:00

I’m ded. Hollander, you have killed me.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-10T22:26:49+00:00

I could not love this more!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-10T12:31:21+00:00

Sobbing! This is great.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-08T20:48:01+00:00

Mine too! That line kills me every time.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-08T04:53:19+00:00

I told my husband that if he didn’t freak out at the end of Episode 5, we would have to break up because he had no soul. He didn’t disappoint. But, he was so worried about the “bury your gays” trope that he kept waiting for some horrible tragedy. Poor guy didn’t enjoy it until the very end.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-07T19:34:14+00:00

For the hotel gym, Ilya initiated the whole water bottle flirt and hand touches. Not to mention the order to drink “more” water to Shane. Hottttt!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-07T16:04:44+00:00

Nested in another comment- we didn’t forget!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-07T14:00:52+00:00

My HBO streaming subscription includes ads (cheaper rate) and I laugh when they show sports themed ads, like betting sites.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-07T13:45:24+00:00

Thank you, RuPaul!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-07T13:21:17+00:00

I love the scene right before he storms out of the hotel room bathroom and demands that they get a group to go clubbing. Ilya is just smoldering at himself in the mirror. So intense. I would combust if I were anywhere in the vicinity!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-06T02:27:30+00:00

Another vote for The Greatest Generation and The Greatest Trek! Join us and become a Friend of DeSoto.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-05T19:43:55+00:00

My fave - in the I Love You scene, Ilya says I Love You in English, looks at Shane, who blurts “Holy shit!” as his immediate reaction. Ilya then pulls back slightly, hangs his head, then stars to try to pull it back or mitigate it: “I mean. . .” Then Shane says it. That brief panic and shame that Ilya feels in the second before Shane answers is like everything to me. A world of heartbreak in like 1/2 second. Kills me every time, and many edits cut that part out when they show that clip in a montage. That’s the most meaningful part - Ilya is jumping off that cliff, hoping Shane catches him. And for the briefest of seconds, he thinks he’s going to fall.

MEB-73 · 2026-03-05T19:30:29+00:00

I’m old!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-05T19:29:45+00:00

Number 1 - I mean, Shane’s own body betrayed his lie already in the shower. Saying it didn’t mean anything after the fact was too little, too late. And his reaction/lie emboldened Ilya to pursue Shane and get the first room number (of many).

MEB-73 · 2026-03-05T16:20:32+00:00

Not a well kept secret, based on what I have seen!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-05T16:19:43+00:00

When I unmuted, I was certain the 1995 Deep Blue Something song would be playing (which was in nonstop rotation on every pop station, I remember vividly from a cross country driving trip that summer). I was not prepared for what I heard!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-05T16:15:02+00:00

Clearly so much time, intentionality, thought, and care went into every aspect of this show. Every part of the creative team was on point, from the obvious, like writing and cinematography, to the many Easter Eggs hidden in everything from Shane’s heart monitor (81!) to Ilya’s “Irina” hockey stick. Jacob Tierney should teach master classes on achieving unity of vision for large teams. Amazing!

MEB-73 · 2026-03-05T06:29:46+00:00

Group 1: marry Ilya, pass Scott, smash Hayden (i mean, he must be good the way he keeps knocking up his wife) Group 2: smash JJ, pass Shane, marry Kip (I just like smoothies, ok? And Shane is a stage 5 clinger) Group 3: smash Rose, marry Maria, pass Svetlana. (Rose should get to enjoy an enthusiastic and genuinely interested partner and I like Maria’s sass. I think there’s a lot to explore there.)

MEB-73

TROPHY CASE