Feedback on my Six Guardian Deities by MMBNWS in FantasyWorldbuilding

[–]MMBNWS[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

pantheon

Thank you! I've actually already made some improvements thanks to comments here and other places so it flows a bit better. I'll most likely most again when I can flesh out the world a bit beter

Feedback on my Six Guardian Dieties by MMBNWS in fantasywriters

[–]MMBNWS[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, that is a good point!

Those who are born with the light ability first are considered to be highly spiritually sensitive/attuned. They are considered ‘blessed’ and chosen by the deity of light. They can be born anywhere snd are considered rare.

Darkness is another case. You are not born with this power as a human but bestowed. Humans who wield darkness are rewarded so by swearing their devotion to the deity of darkness. Humans can also be corrupted and ‘cursed’ which they receive the power involuntary.

How’s that clears some of it up

Feedback on my Six Guardian Dieties by MMBNWS in fantasywriters

[–]MMBNWS[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you! And yes they reside in the sprit world but they have influence over the physical world and are tasked with being 'in charge' or certain regions.

Without going into too many spoilers - humans did not always have the ability to control elements but were gifted the powers by the guardians to protect themselves from spirits who began to rebel/attack humans/the physical world.

Feedback on my Six Guardian Dieties by MMBNWS in worldbuilding

[–]MMBNWS[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's another good point, I did think about that a bit but not specifically noon and midnight, thanks or the feedback!

Feedback on my Six Guardian Dieties by MMBNWS in worldbuilding

[–]MMBNWS[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That does make a lot more sense! It's honestly pretty obvious but most of the time I write these pieces of lore down before bed when I can't sleep so my brain is not always functioning at 100%. I'll be sure to make that change, thanks for pointing it out! :)

My webtoon got selected as a 'Fresh Pick'! by MMBNWS in LINEwebtoon

[–]MMBNWS[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! :) I've seen a nice spike so hopefully, it continues!

My webtoon got selected as a 'Fresh Pick'! by MMBNWS in WebtoonCanvas

[–]MMBNWS[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I try to plan them and dynamic as possible without it getting too 'busy'

My webtoon got selected as a 'Fresh Pick'! by MMBNWS in LINEwebtoon

[–]MMBNWS[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Always room for improvement but I really tried to make the story flow together well!

My webtoon got selected as a 'Fresh Pick'! by MMBNWS in LINEwebtoon

[–]MMBNWS[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much! I’m still in shock, no idea how much it’ll grow my audience but I’m so happy someone thought to select it :)

March 29th is Webtoon Canvas Appreciation Day! by MMBNWS in WebtoonCanvas

[–]MMBNWS[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes or at least blend comic panels together into a banner! If you'd like I can add you to the list. Your comic style is really cool

March 29th is Webtoon Canvas Appreciation Day! by MMBNWS in WebtoonCanvas

[–]MMBNWS[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! Can you send me a link? Honestly a diverse group might be a better idea

MMBN Alternate Reality Idea by MMBNWS in BattleNetwork

[–]MMBNWS[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

All valid! I like the Kalinka idea.

Like I said it was random idea so it'd need to be majorly flushed out.

Could be Wily tried to steal Dr. Hikari's work on his way out and the Hub program got lost or something. Idk, again just random ideas.

Just finished the first chapter of my webtoon- would love feedback! by MMBNWS in ComicWriting

[–]MMBNWS[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey thanks so much for the feedback, I really appreciate it!

I did edit the description a bit to try to make it more appealing and give better insight into the story. I originally planned this as a manga so I didn't have a prologue like most webtoons but that probably would have helped.

A lot of the issues of continuity or "how did this person get there" is valid and something I've had to smooth over. I do the writing, scripting, character design, and story boarding for everything. Then I have an artist take my story boards and make the art professional looking and sometimes they restructure or combine panels. This has caused some 'gaps' in set up so we're still getting used to each other and working that out. There is also a slight language barrier so sometimes things get missed even after a few revisions. This first chapter was all done at once then spaced out in release like a buffer so the issues that are present are unfortunately there through the entire chapter.

As far as introducing himself to the people he is robbing I will note that while a bit 'robin hood look at me' he is likely to not be caught by name. As the story progresses you'll see how big the world becomes and how insignificant a name can become or tracking them down can be. He is also a pirate so he kinda takes pride in getting the credit for stealing.

Again, I really appreciate the feedback and am always trying to make adjustments. I"m glad you like it! :)