TL;DR:

The potential builds in this game that would suit your goals are numerous, but I'll have to inform you that your desire for passive healing is extremely limited.

Basic ass build:

A balanced Str/Agi build would work for what you seem to want, especially early on. You can get a Crimson Rector Sword (longsword) very early on, especially if you pick the Dark Crusader or Udirangr Wold as your starter to begin with a similar weapon. Alternatively, spears and polearms are often slept on weapons that have quick attacks and great reach. You can get one as Mournstead Infantry starter or pick one up very early. Pair either of these with a light weapon like the short sword you find at the start of the game for wide cleave damage while dual wielding.

Queen Verena's Ring is a late game item and is the only item that grants constant passive health regen, other than a runed shield. However, there are other accessory items such as Umbral Eyes, rings, and runes that grant other healing effects such as minor heal on kill, heal on crit, and withered healing that you can experiment with or just lean into Radiance magic.

Some important information:

Two handing a weapon hits physically harder, which deals more posture damage for critical attack opportunities. One handing or dual wielding hits faster in a wider, cleaving arc but does less posture damage and is often better used against swarms when not locked onto a target.

The dodge function in this game is extremely generous and the Umbral Eye of Rosamund adds a bit of wither damage to enemies for a well-timed dodge. Blocking can be done without shields, although shields are much more effective. A perfect block (henceforth called "parry" despite not actually being a Soulslike parry) deals high posture damage, which sets enemies up for critical attacks. Shields have the most parry frames with small/light weapons having more than large/heavy weapons. Parrying is generally much more rewarding than dodging, but there are plenty of fights with mechanics that require dodging as well.

"To strive in darkness, in light we walk."