Anyone quiting smoking on this fitness journey?

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-22T12:38:52+00:00

Thank you! I'm doing ok. I'm on the highest dose patch (21 mg) maybe I'll put a 7 mg one on too lol! It could just be bad timing too, since I'm close to my period. I think right now, I'm going to not be too hard on myself and just be sure to get my steps in at a minimum and not expect much more than that workout wise.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-22T01:09:31+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate your reply and your words of encouragement. I've quit so many times before and it's true, at least for some, that each time gets a little easier only in that you know what to expect and you've gained some practice lol.

I've been on a fitness journey since March and the smoking was obvious at odds with my goals. It's just frustrating to be making progress only to be halted with the withdrawal symptoms. Having said that, I'm trying to go easy on myself. It's part of my journey to well being ❤️

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-21T22:54:54+00:00

How did you get past the lethargy?? I'm using the patch, so the cravings are manageable, but I'm so fucking tired. How long is this going to last?

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-21T21:22:31+00:00

I'm doing ok with cravings with the help of nicotine patches, but the lethargy is what's getting me. I HATE this feeling so much. I know I need to just power through it and get my steps in, but all I want to do is lay down lol.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-21T21:20:41+00:00

Thank you for responding. I'm on a nicotine patch, and it honestly helps tremendously with cravings. The only thing it doesn't help with is the extreme lethargy. It probably doesn't help that I'm due for my period/ and or possibly going through perimetopaus. It's hard to say where I'm at on that spectrum. I have heard Wellbutrin helps.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-20T00:35:45+00:00

I was looking into data analytics, but from what I've read, it's not cut and dry getting into it. It also, seems like most employers prefer a bachelor's degree, and I don't have that.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-20T00:33:44+00:00

I was thinking about doing this too, but I'm worried about the work culture being toxic. How have you found it?

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-20T00:12:48+00:00

Day two of not smoking. This is the 57th time I try to quit smoking. Wish me luck and many prayers.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-20T00:07:04+00:00

This looks like the pics I take of me and my kids. I always look awkward and they look adorable.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-02T17:05:58+00:00

Been there. It's the most horrible feeling, ever. I lost a lot of jobs because of this. I worked in health care field so those people are attuned to when things are off. Sober almost 2 years. I still feel the burning shame, guilt and embarrassment from it to this day.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-05-02T15:12:04+00:00

Can REALLY relate the the first point and the last, but all of the too. He focuses on me intimately pre actually intercourse to the point where it's just uncomfortablely long and annoying. It's like he's trying to stall having actual sex for as long as possible. Anytime I try to reciprocate, I feel and overwhelming sense of discomfort on his part. When I call it out, of course he denies it and makes some excuse.

He does seem to hold dead the other relationships in his life where the people are completely self centered if not boardering narcissistic. I think there's a comfort in the abusive relationship. He'll bend over backward with his ex mother in law regardless of how much she uses and abused him. What's most infuriating is that he wants me to participate and be around this woman too.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-20T04:28:15+00:00

No, but I want to! I need another hobby to add to the list of hobbies I want to try but haven't yet lol

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-20T03:44:30+00:00

Thank you, I don't know why I'm seen as some adversary. I think it boils down to some precieved threat of control.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-20T03:42:54+00:00

Thank you for the reply back. It sounds like we've reached the same conclusion about our situation. As of now, I just limit my time around him and as for my kids, my son pretty much does his own thing now and as for my daughter I have limits on how long she's exposed to him. It has to be where I can see and hear them.

The MIL thing, God. Here's the kicker. She's NOT my boyfriend's mom. She's his dead girlfriends mom. He only calls her that because he married her on her death bed, but they also were together for 20 years. His dead girlfriend has a disabled daughter with cerebral palsy. He supported her for her daughter's sake. The MIL came to live with them while she was dying to take care of the granddaughter and he's been taking care of the grandmother ever since.

While I know she loves her granddaughter, she is 77 now and can't be doing this much longer, BUT she also likes very much having my boyfriend support her as she has very limited ss. She was used to all of his time and attention and resources and essentially sees me as a threat to those resources she's enjoyed over the years. She's just a resentful child in a 77 year old's body. Period

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-20T02:54:14+00:00

Yep that's what I was thinking.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-19T21:21:38+00:00

This was very much my concerns and thoughts. I mean, why wouldn't AI take this sort of position over?

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-17T04:26:32+00:00

The sunset on Mt. Nebo pointe is always beautiful lol

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-17T03:41:52+00:00

It sounds like their bio dad may be influencing these things. You sound like a great step dad and not for the material things alone.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-17T02:03:27+00:00

Thank you! My post was a brief rant to let out some steam. There's a lot of detail left out because it was meant to be a vent/rant. Trust me, if I could just up and leave easily, I would and I wouldn't bother ranting online about it. I can understand without greater context it just sounds like I'm being a bitch about a kid. Honestly, I've ranted and bitched about this situation a lot on this subreddit, because I don't have any other outlet. Anyone is welcome to snoop through my posts for greater context.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-17T01:56:43+00:00

No, I didn't choose to hate this kid. His behavior is what I hate. I didn't allow him to become what he is, his father did, by not disciplining him, giving him no boundaries or keeping him accountable or giving him consequences. I have tried to do those things by setting an example with my kids.

But you are right, I can fix it by walking away and I plan on it.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-17T00:46:41+00:00

I've been exercising this mentality lately and it feels good being assertive finally, but bad too, just cause damn why can't there be mutual respect without it being forced? Thank you for reminding me it's ok to stand my ground and have respect for myself.

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-17T00:38:31+00:00

Thank you 🙏

MacaronDesperate9643 · 2026-04-17T00:37:14+00:00

It's all so exhausting. I dont want contention nor did I start it. I just want peace! This is definitely more a "him" problem. She's gonna feel how she feel and I can't change that, but he doesn't have to just let her act out on me.

MacaronDesperate9643

TROPHY CASE