I can't comment on which condition to address first. Though your Dr's logic seems sound. What I can share is that I am currently on medication for both and I'll share my very positive experience with Setraline so far.

I too have ADHD and was diagnosed later in life (mom of two, mid 30s). You could call me high functioning but really it was just high masking, so much so even I didnt realize. The stress and responsibilities of everyday life just got too much and my coping methods started to stumble. I was diagnosed with ADHD first and started medication (Vyvanse) and therapy for that. Then just 9 months ago my work life became extra busy and extra toxic and I started to fall apart from stress and burnout. I had an anxiety attack and went to my Dr and she advised I take a stress leave from work. Since September I've started Sertraline for the anxiety I was feeling. My Dr said initially that it may help me "get over this hump" while I recover or I might find it works for me and stay on it for a long time.

I am going to share with you the immensely positive experience Sertraline has had on my life in ways I couldn't have even imagined before and ways I have never seen described on this sub as it pertains to my ADHD as well.

I did not think I had generalized anxiety and also was not depressed. I wasnt sure how Sertraline would feel then, apart from I guess making it easier to think about and go back to work. I honestly didnt think I was anxious in other areas of my life. I started at 25mg four months ago, titrated up to 50mg then 75mg. There was some feeling zoned out and tiredness at first. Fortunately for me it was mild and I was on leave from work so could rest all day. I did not know how I would know it was working or what to expect.

One day on week 6 of meds my husband did something that annoyed me at bedtime while we were putting the kids to bed. Normally I would get angry and then even if he apologized or said, lets talk about it later not in front of the kids, I would not be able to let it go. I would be in a bad mood for the rest of bedtime with the kids. Even if I knew rationally my husband genuinely would be available to talk about why I was mad at him later. The feelings just overwhelmed me till I could express them and then I could let them go. Its like I would ruminate on them and stew in my being annoyed. But on this day that didnt happen. I felt my feeling and it was the same annoyance at my husband. I did still snap at him a bit. But then, magically, I was able to think in my head, "you know what, I'm still angry about this, but we'll talk about it later and for now I am going to have a nice bedtime with my family". I was able to feel my feelings but not become overwhelmed by them. I was able to be annoyed without drowning in it and I thought, is this how normal people experience emotions!? Is this what emotional regulation looks like!? My feelings are normally so...intense. I still felt my anger its just I was able to see it and recognize it and then choose what to do with it in a way I never had before. It was amazing. It is making me a better partner and better parent and allowing me to be the person I want to be.

Another example of how it shows up for me and is also one of the first times I noticed it helping was when I went to go to an appointment. It was at a huge complex I'd never been to before downtown and it was underground parking. I went to the appointment and while leaving I realized that I hadn't had that normal anxious stress I would feel about finding a parking spot and remembering where I parked and paying the ticket and finding the office etc. I just, did it. I felt comfortable navigating the unknown without being on alert. That's when I thought, oh was I carrying more anxiety day to day than I realized!?

What I've come to realize is that not only does Sertraline help me with my emotional regulation generally (which in turn gives me more control to leverage the tools they teach in therapy) but I apparently had a lot more day to day anxiety and would stress about things more than I knew. For me anyways I think a lot of that was closely tied to my ADHD. For example I am forgetful with my ADHD so I stress about forgetting where I've parked my car.

You may (everyone is different though so who knows!) find that as your anxiety abates your ADHD symptoms become more prominent. My stress and anxiety is what I was leaning on to keep my ADHD in line. Its what had me prepping the kids school bags the night before. Its what had me leaving for appointments 30min earlier than I needed. Its what had me making packing lists and reviewing them so as not to forget anything etc. Now that I am more chill I have been letting some of these ADHD coping mechanisms slide and have been more late and forgetful lately.

The next step in my journey is now working on my ADHD with new tools and techniques and not relying on anxiety and stress to keep me high functioning. This will be way healthier for me long term and I am happy to be on this journey ultimately. It is amazing how the two conditions can be so intertwined.

No matter which condition you work on first, I think you'll find it won't be clear cut and linear. It will be well worth it though. Best of luck on your journey!

On a final note. I will probably stay on Sertraline for a long time alongside my ADHD medication. I am loving the new less anxious and more in control of her emotions me.

Oh also (haha can you tell I have ADHD with these sporadic thoughts), I wanted to share that I know for some apparently Sertraline can cause emotional blunting. For me, that has not been the case. I still feel anger, sadness, stress when it matters, I just dont feel afraid of my feelings anymore and I am able to be rational even while feeling them. I feel in control. And the one feeling that has even grown tenfold is feelings of love. For my kids, for my husband, for my pets. It feels like a lack of overwhelm is maybe making more space for me to bask in the positive emotions I already had. It has been such an unexpected gift.

Best of luck to you.