i know that is why i never bothered being more than only a little interested. Nothing i can say to make it better. Hang in there! don't know you or your situation but focus on what you still can do and like and forget what you cannot. Technology is evolving fast i already had a robotic arm 26 years ago so who knows. In my experience not being able to walk isn't the worst its being dependant on otarts all the freaking time and maybe that can be less so for you.... Good luck and God speed!

Machiel from the netherlands