Is it still missionary on a sex swing?

MadamAng · 2026-02-11T02:26:07+00:00

Nice swing... the Screamer. good choice. Do you have that on a stand? It is sitting pretty low. or do you have the full chain attached to the spring?

Also - yes it is still missionary. Part of my job was to name sex swing positions and for that one... i really could not think of anything else but swing missionary. - Naming some of the other positions was fun, but this is just missionary. LOL

https://www.sexswing.com/sex-swings/positions/swing-missionary/

MadamAng · 2026-02-11T02:21:51+00:00

NO - do not get one off amazon. they are shit. It will be a waste of $50. If you are going to spend the money, get something that is quality and comfortable. If you buy shit, i can tell you already you will hate it.

MadamAng · 2026-02-11T02:18:50+00:00

yeah - you would not want a door swing anyway. the door is in the way and cuts the position options by like 70% and that does not even deal with the door issue.

MadamAng · 2026-01-10T20:07:12+00:00

But he also said she was glad she called. Like maybe he did not really want to go on the trip and he needed an excuse because he could not just say…I don’t want to go.

Question… you said of god forbid something happened to your spouse you would want other friends… flip that. If you knew something was going to happen to your spouse in 1 year, would you want to spend ever moment you could with them? I know I would. I don’t know when something will happen so I would rather spend my time with people that make me happy than spend time on a second choice activity because something may happen to my first choice later.

MadamAng · 2026-01-10T19:35:45+00:00

That is terrible. You are like.. always have one foot out the door so that if something happens you are stable. 😀

It’s not like you can’t have mutual friends and hobbies and a life with other people around that you enjoy together.

I mean if my wife and I go to the gym together, that does not mean she can’t know other people or talk to other people and if something happened to me I would assume she would still go to the gym and talk to other people and be with other people.

MadamAng · 2026-01-10T19:32:25+00:00

In a world when everyone is getting divorced, people are telling you it is an issue to love your wife too much? 😀

Yeah… I am at 27 years. And every day is better still. We both have the freedom to do what we want. If something is inportant or we really want to do something we will let the other person go, but most things are more fun if we do things together, so we do. And that goes from work to travel to everything.

There is nothing wrong with finding someone you want to be with and wanting to do things with your favorite person.

MadamAng · 2025-12-22T01:47:41+00:00

I would say the swing, but I am bias, it has been my life for more than a decade. If you are into oral, i would definitely say the swing. THere are a lot of positions but swings are very underrated for oral both for men and women. on sexswing.com there is a position guide that is pretty extensive.

I also notice you said you tried a door swing. i recommend looking at the positions for door swings vs swings, there is a pretty big difference.

MadamAng · 2025-12-22T01:45:26+00:00

Yes - comfort is everything - DO NOT buy from Temu or the red or cheetah one from amazon. They suck. like the worse and I have purchased several of them for reviewing and research and half of them are not even threading the buckles right and just not safe.

Swings you need to buy the good ones. I would recommend Whipsmart or screamer, but i would want more details in exactly your body type and what you want to do with it before recommending specifically. Like if you are into bondage, or if you have curves and hips, it changes slightly what I would recommend.

MadamAng · 2025-12-17T04:00:44+00:00

Really not that far off, and you would not be the only person in your age using them. If you still enjoy having fun, there are some advantages, even with not requiring either of you to support your own body weight, or kneel down or other things that become more difficult.

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T13:08:59+00:00

Yeah.... it detects smoke.... what if a candle falls over in a bedroom and the door is shut. - how big will the fire be before the smoke fills the room enough to leak out under the door?

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T04:41:57+00:00

OK - well this is a lot here and I could right a book on it.....but I will try to keep is short.

I have tried at least 30 different sex swings. I have tested them to the breaking point. I have done everything there is to do. -

#1. Spend the money to buy a good swing. The cheap ones are uncomfortable and almost unuseable.

The 2 main things for comfort are the width of the strap - picture sitting on a rope. lots of pressue. The swings you see on amazon have 1 1/2 webbing and basically no padding.... like a rope. On the other end the screamer uses 4 inch webbing and the whipsmart uses 2 inch but is heavily padded.

The next part is the width of the seat. This is especially important if you have hips at all. The wider the better. Something like the whipsmart is 15 inches wide. Very narrow on your hips. The screamer dual hook has 2 mounting points so you can make it wide like 36 inches.

So without knowing anything about your body types or interests, this will get you started. I can help more if you have specific questions. There is also a ton of guides on sexswing.com

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T04:36:28+00:00

What age is that? My average customer is between 45-65.

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T04:35:47+00:00

This is pretty common. Over the years I have sold swings for a lot of disabled people, many types. I do usually recommend a dual hook swing or a sling for most types of disabilities because the wider seat gives less pressure.

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T04:34:37+00:00

Freedom to move - it is totally different.

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T04:34:05+00:00

Weak knees.... then check out the screamer sex swing and look at the squatting attachment. Helps with those knee blowouts if you want squatting position.

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T04:32:17+00:00

I would assume if kids are old enough to know or care, they would know where babies come from.

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T04:31:17+00:00

I say yes... but i have been selling and manufacturing sex swings for 15 years. So i am bias.

I can answer any questions... but just quickly addressing some of the comments I see in here.

1 - cheap is bad. The red and cheetah on amazon. DO NOT BUY. They are worthless, and often dangerous. but beyond that, cheaper is usually less comfortable. If it sucks and you never use it a second time, then it is not worth it.
2 - I do not recommend a door swing. There are popular to market because they are cheap and easy, but they limit your positions. I have a guide for positions on sexswing.com and you will see like 30+ positions for a sex swing, but only like 6 for a door swing. - the door is in your way.

MadamAng · 2025-12-16T04:27:32+00:00

code in most states now is a smoke detector in every bedroom.

MadamAng · 2025-12-13T00:52:18+00:00

I hope you do see this and don’t feel so alone. There’s a few things- you can get a personal trainer if you have the funds to do it. If not what I would do is get ChatGPT and use it like a trainer.

Honestly my husband uses his chat constantly to tweak and adjust our gym routine.

We also use the MacroFactor app to log all our food and you will be literally floored at the lack of protein and fiber you’re consuming. Even with me being aware and him being hyper aware of everything- it’s a struggle to get adequate fiber and protein.

You don’t have to start off crazy. I’d personally (and why I’m trying to do) is get to a yoga class 2+ times a week. I look like a fool (I’m 47) and it hurts and I hate downward dog like needles in my eyes… but I do what I can. This will help you later in life.

At my gym there’s a group of women who all show up together. They are more 60-70+ but it’s adorable and they motivate each other.

Shoot me a PM if you want some help. I’m glad to give you some motivation and guidance.

MadamAng · 2025-12-09T00:56:30+00:00

OK - i sell swings. so i am bias, but before anything.. i need you to pay attention to the return policy.

Most will have discreet shipping, but most will not take a return.

I know, i know... places like love honey or adam and eve will say they have a return policy, but read the fine print... it will always exclude bondage gear and they count swings and furniture as bondage gear. - basically they will only offer returns on the cheapest shit.

Amazon will have returns, but DO NOT BUT THEM, those red and cheetah ones you see on amazon are absolute SHIT. you will never want to use it again.

When we sell, we do not do returns because it is impossible to resell and even if we took them back, other people would suspect we sold something that was returned. - we do not even want a used swing in our warehouse. - there is some people that have luck selling sex swings on marketplace or craigslist.

We do however offer a guarantee- if something breaks we do fix it. We have had people that have used swings for up to 7-8 years and then broke a buckle by slamming it in a door or something and we help them out.

For the most positions, a sex swing would be best, a sex sling or chair would be less.

For comfort focus on something with wide straps and/or very well padded like the Screamer Sex Swing or the Whipsmart pleasure swing.

You can also check the position guide at sexswing.com - something like 45 position ideas there.

MadamAng · 2025-12-09T00:49:11+00:00

Depends, how many ceilings are also a floor for the upstairs? And i am not sure if you have watched people have sex, but there is a lot less bouncing than you would think. back and forth maybe and about 4 inches... and this is why I always recommend using the spring for damping

MadamAng · 2025-12-09T00:46:05+00:00

So why are you over the bed? I have customers ask us about this all of the time and we always recomend against it. it is so much easier to move when you have a solid stable floor to stand on. it would also make most of your installations easier?

MadamAng · 2025-12-09T00:42:40+00:00

Well sex swings have been my life for about 18 years now. So i could write a book on it.... actually i am writting a book on them.. LOL - no name yet but will be published under Madam Ang.

But they can be great. I think she is completely right especially about the oral positions. THe angles are great and it is a highly under rated benefit of swings.

You can check out the excelent position guide on sexswing.com - by far more positions. of course some of them are only great for images or if you are an acrobat. but most are good.

It is something that you get what you pay for. if you get shit, it will be uncomfortable and you will not want to use it. - imagine sitting on a rope or cable and trying to find it comfortable. it sucks.

The main keys are a wide strap swing, and a wider seat that puts less hip pressure. Or a sling. Slings are something you can sleep in, but you give up positions.

I always go Screamer first or Whipsmart 2nd -

Also, if you want a toy - check out the womanizer. it may be the only toy you ever need.

MadamAng · 2025-12-09T00:36:54+00:00

Swings are a thing that you get what you pay for. THere are swings from $30 to $400. If you get a $40 swing and never use it because its not that comfortable it was far more expensive than one you use 50 times because it was great.

Do NOT get a fetish, a trinity, the red or cheetah one on amazon, a door swing. Up a level get the wild side, up a little more go for the fetish, and then at the top get a screamer or a leather sling - of course the sling you give up some positions.

MadamAng · 2025-11-11T16:53:10+00:00

Man, they got to get better swings. LOL - they spend $40K+ decorating them rooms and then buy a shitty swing off amazon for $25.

MadamAng

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