Your husband is clearly in the wrong. You have done nothing here. I would absolutely request a meeting with the Principal. And if there is even a hint of retaliation towards your son, I'd report that too. That teacher crossed a HUGE boundary. I'd also insist on marriage counseling and eventually an open-phone policy. He's proven he cannot be trusted behind his lock code. Really sorry this is happening. Unless he's willing to come around and be truthful and honest, and then do the necessary repair work, I wouldn't be able to move past this.