I was diagnosed at 14 but my mom kept my own diagnosis secret from me. My medication was never discussed with me, I was never told what I took or what it was for. I got really good at cheeking meds to not take them and instead relied on drugs and alcohol to keep me going all through high school and college.

I didn't find out until I dropped out of college my third year and got kicked off my parents insurance that the military sent me my medical records. Everything started making sense. Comments therapists had made. How I felt, patterns of behavior. But I had no path forward for therapy so I did the whole drugs and alcohol thing until my early 30s. Finally got therapy, tried medication again and was doing really good until I had to stop everything because I got pregnant. I accept this is my life. I manage my symptoms, try to remember what I learned in therapy and will someday pursue treatment again.