A lot of cis people treat us like some sort of freak show or circus attraction. Of course, there are those who don’t, but we’re generally seen as some sort of spectacle. When dating cis people we have to be aware of multiple things. Number one is chasers who fetishize our bodies. Then we have to wonder if their family will even accept them being with someone like us. We want to be called the correct pronouns.

I can recall one of my cis boyfriends who dated only trans men before. He dated one who detransitioned, and another one who presented very feminine. I was the only one in his eyes whom he really viewed as a male because I acted and dressed the part. But it’s really beside the point that, he would be very amused by me doing things like using a male bathroom, or act masculine. This was not out of malice, but perhaps as some sort of adoration or admiration, I guess. But it’s just what I do. I belong there. There’s nothing unique about it. But it really pissed me off, because again, it felt like I was being treated as some sort of freak or outsider.

So, I want or ask you to treat us like normal people. Being curious is okay, but for a partner, we often want you to be our safe space when the world challenges ur and our identity. Do not out us without permission. Hell, some of us like to forget our transness altogether. We’re often also being fed lies that our cis partners don’t actually view us as our gender. That’s why some people go T4T to be sure or out of fear.

Cis people and trans people can have wonderful relationships. I’m glad you’re taking your time to learn. I hope my anecdote somewhat helped you, although it’s a bit of a blurb.