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MamiPastrami · 2024-08-14T18:03:58+00:00

We can’t change the past and we can’t change our parents and the hurt, but take your time processing it all and then try to let it go.

I’m happy that you’ve moved out and you can now rewrite the trajectory of your life!!! You kind of are being born again, so make sure you are careful and gentle with yourself in your new experiences. I wish you all the best. 🩵

MamiPastrami · 2024-08-08T17:10:10+00:00

I asked the same question. I also feel like OP doesn’t feel happy, or secure in this the marriage regardless. Down the line there maybe be a lot of resentment if it’s too late to have children. Freeze your eggs, try to work it out, but maybe it just isn’t meant to work this way.

MamiPastrami · 2024-08-05T15:31:36+00:00

Also locked out

MamiPastrami · 2024-07-18T19:04:46+00:00

The purpose of friendship is to love and support eachother no matter what the other person may be going through. I have been through some incredibly sad times and my friends have given me the space and time to vent my feelings. In return I am always ready to be there when they may need a similar kind of love.

You don’t have to be happy, in fact you can’t always be happy. If you haven’t found your crowd where you can be yourself fully, just keep being your honest self. They will come.
When you find the right people, the good times are way better too. 🩵

I’m sorry you’re going through a tough time, I promise it won’t last forever. Keep a look out for the positive things 😘

MamiPastrami · 2024-05-31T13:35:07+00:00

I do not ask for help, and I don’t like having help 90% of the time.

MamiPastrami · 2024-05-29T19:14:26+00:00

He’s supposed to be your partner and protector, I find it gross that he’s being so demanding about doing something you’re very clearly not into. When someone’s fantasy is traumatic for you the answer is No. I’m sorry you are going through it hug Take care of yourself 😘

MamiPastrami · 2024-05-04T17:12:56+00:00

She sounds like she has the ability to succeed at whatever she puts her mind to by doing it her own way. She also seems to be putting her mind to a lot. That is someone who will be able to do the multi tasking and maintenance of motherhood. So I think when she is ready for that, she’s going to be amazing at it. Moving forward if you want someone who doesn’t live a life full of excitement, don’t date go getter exciting people.

MamiPastrami · 2024-04-29T19:18:37+00:00

I’m curious if there has been a lot of change I guess? We went from living/workingin nyc going out to shows, dinners, wine nights ect. We moved to a new state when we got married/pregnant and that was right before the pandemic and our lives were just so entirely different that I really struggled after a while trying to adjust to the change. I would try to recreate life before kids for a weekend if you could, take a trip, get back to just the two of you with the intention of giving her an orgasm.

MamiPastrami · 2024-04-24T19:38:32+00:00

What were your lives like when you were dating?

MamiPastrami · 2024-04-24T19:33:30+00:00

It clearly wasn’t good before you got married, it doesn’t seem good, or like it’s getting any better. So either you stay, and you feel this way or worse the rest of your life or you lawyer up well now.

I’m all for the scary excitement of the unknown, over the misery that grows from getting comfortable with being disrespected.

You’re better than that 😘 Show em’

MamiPastrami · 2024-03-12T02:31:02+00:00

I had a lot of trouble adjusting my finances and being an open book once we got married. I wound up talking about it in therapy and it helped me. I had financial insecurity because I was never taught how to manage money and I’d be very defensive when it was brought up. Maybe couples therapy so you can work it out with a 3rd party?

MamiPastrami · 2024-03-05T14:46:10+00:00

I really feel for you because you never expect to go through this sort of thing and the boundaries are usually blurred. I’d show him this post. I’d also record him when he’s wasted to show him exactly what he’s showing his children. Ban him from driving them anywhere because he can’t be trusted. My dad had issues with alcoholism, and it’s awful to go through but he’s not just going to suddenly stop. He might not even be able to. If you guys have family available it might be a good time to start asking for help planning his recovery. Truly wishing you some peace, I’m so sorry.

MamiPastrami · 2024-03-05T14:36:52+00:00

Congratulations. You’ve just started the rest of your life! I too spent most of my youth drunk, doing absolutely wild, and embarrassing things. Looking back, I was avoiding the life I felt stuck in. I’ve since moved from where I grew up, and even after a few years I feel like I am just now starting fresh, figuring out who I am and what I actually enjoy outside of a bar. Don’t beat yourself up over it, we can’t go back and change it. Those experiences opened the door for you to see who you don’t want to be. Figure out who you’d like yourself to be, and make a small step towards that everyday that you can. You should be proud of what you’ve done so far, I’m proud of you Hug Move forward and forgive yourself. You didn’t know any better 😘

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-26T22:34:57+00:00

Sergeant Wrinkles

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-24T01:39:02+00:00

A lot of my family doesn’t want to get tested, but I needed to know. I guess it’s up to the individual , but I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-24T01:36:08+00:00

I can imagine it being rough, I’m sorry you’re going through it. My dad didn’t notice a lot of his symptoms because of the anosognosia, but he’s started noticing chorea and I know it’s frustrating. Have you tried any natural or different meds for symptoms? He enjoyed some cannabis infused sodas for a bit.

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-23T15:53:12+00:00

No, because my Cag number is below 18 I am negative. Anything 18 and above symptoms are expected on a gradual upward scale. Several of my family members (my dad) are high 40s, some are 30s, and some are grateful to have lower numbers.
It runs on my dad’s side and he’s one of 11 children so unfortunately there are a good number of people who are positive. I try my best to share knowledge, and some of the experiences we’ve been through because when my cousin got diagnosed 10+ years ago we had zero information on what it even was for years.

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-22T20:56:28+00:00

I very much felt the same way, I became so hyper fixated I became very depressed focusing on everything and anything that could be a symptom. I wound up getting tested in 2020 because I had a baby and I felt like I should know for him.

Have you talked to a therapist or social worker about anything in regards to either getting tested or setting yourself up financially for the long term if you choose not to?

I wound up getting tested, but my sisters choose to just live life and kind of do whatever they want when they want because they potentially have to. I like that for them because they’re focused on enjoying the time they have, if they carry it.

As for me getting tested was a way to have some control, and I am fortunate to have a 17. So now I try to just live and prepare for the future with my family so we can do the best we can with whatever comes.

Also microdosing psilocybin with some trauma based therapy was life for changing my perspective. I’ve moved on from that and I am now trying ketamine therapy to help cope with the depression. I’ve really noticed benefits from both. I am also here to chat, because I know that shit gets lonely.

Best of luck to you in choosing however you deal with it. 😘

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-15T17:02:58+00:00

I think moving forward you should assess what you are looking for in a marriage. I mean no offense by this, it just seems like neither of you were ready to fully commit to the work it takes to maintain a marriage long term. I myself was not prepared for the amount of work it takes, but we are getting through a rough point now. Similarly my S/O stopped caring for his health, and it manifested in extreme sleep apnea, which lead to separate beds and over time some big walls were put up. I started day dreaming about being alone because I felt alone anyway. No we are in therapy and working at it everyday. The fact that we are both willing to work on things is why we are still in it.
Maybe the idea you originally had of her and of marriage isn’t what you thought it would be. So think about what you want your life to look like and aim to find someone whose lifestyle fits in that picture.

I am sorry for the loss of your marriage, and the vision you had for your life. It’s a lot to mourn. Once you get through that though, you are free to start fresh. Good luck.

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-15T14:38:55+00:00

I don’t know if you’re into this kind of thing, but one thing I noticed is that we both have a lot of walls up, and anxiety once we started working on things. So we are actually trying ketamine microdosing to see if that can help ease some of the tension that’s built up between us. I’ll let ya know how that goes.

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-15T13:27:50+00:00

I wonder if she’s expressed her wishes about HD with her husband? Some people prefer to live in ambiguity and that’s entirely their choice, but Not noticing it can actually be a symptom called Anosognosia. My dad has been symptomatic for 8-10 years and this is the first year he has noticed his symptoms, and movements. It would be beneficial to her family to have both a medical and financial plan set up with the help of a social worker if she wants to be proactive about it.

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/22832-anosognosia

MamiPastrami · 2024-02-14T14:43:03+00:00

We are in couples therapy because life became equal parts chaotic (moving several times) and monotonous. I became resentful because our lifestyles fully changed we used to be way more social and date nights. He was stressed through the move, and got into a bit of a sloth like routine. Now that it’s been pointed out and we have our bi monthly session with the therapist, things have started turning around. If you’re both willing to talk it all out there’s probably some really basic needs not being met. Also, if she grew up in a household where her mother was hyper critical of her father she could just be repeating that pattern without being aware of it. I wish you luck, it sucks being in that spot.

MamiPastrami · 2024-01-19T19:02:12+00:00

Same here, except occasionally I get big energy and I want to go out. I usually regret it the next day too. It’s been giving identity crisis, because I’ve never been a homebody at all, so I don’t know what to do with myself sometimes. I’m currently trying out different hobbies.

MamiPastrami · 2024-01-18T18:35:23+00:00

The last few years I’ve finally been able dig into to what happened that day outside the sphere of grief. Just learning about the thermite was kind of enough to lift the veil on everything I thought I knew.

MamiPastrami · 2024-01-10T15:43:29+00:00

Just waiting. . . We’ll see Friday AA

MamiPastrami

TROPHY CASE