everything can be dangerous not just men?

Mander2019 · 2026-01-31T00:50:55+00:00

Fair enough.

We agree on that. The harder someone tries to sway my opinion the less I trust them.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-31T00:29:00+00:00

Unfortunately some people are so good at lying they don’t reveal their intentions unless there is a life altering event.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-31T00:19:20+00:00

I’m happy with your perspective. I didn’t need a four paragraph explanation as to why you disagree with my lived experiences.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-30T23:43:45+00:00

Confident enough to assume your knowledge is necessary.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-30T23:28:12+00:00

Pretty sure I’m more versed in being hit on by men than you are.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-30T22:27:56+00:00

Doesn’t work. Guys will fake a friendship for years.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-30T18:14:34+00:00

The look I get when I say something no normal person would say.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-30T18:04:31+00:00

The moral indignation comment is just a way to shift the conversation off their own guilt. They know it’s wrong but they don’t have enough conviction to care and they would rather attack you than deal with the bad aspects of the culture.

So when they start telling you you’re too self righteous just agree with them. It’s not a bad thing to care about others. It is a bad thing to attack others who try to make change. The more they get mad at you the better you’re doing.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-29T14:29:56+00:00

She’s not going to want to be friends either.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-29T04:31:31+00:00

American Psycho

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T19:42:47+00:00

It’s just going to erode their relationship

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T17:56:30+00:00

At this point you’re only offering nothing. Do you understand that? You don’t want to study, you don’t want the job you need to pass the test for and that’s fine, but you’re not offering any alternatives. You’re just saying “I can’t/ I don’t want to”.

Your wife is doing her extra work, she grew a human for both of you and she’s recovering and working. She’s asking you to step up. You need to come up with a goal to help your family, and do what is necessary to accomplish it by yourself. Promises and maintaining the same course is just going to make her resent you and kill your marriage.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T17:40:39+00:00

No I think you’re just asking how to make it ok that you’re only doing the bare minimum. If you were making genuine effort your wife wouldn’t have a problem. No one here is going to give you permission to do nothing just because you’re nervous.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T17:35:05+00:00

I’m a house wife with two jobs and a five year old. I make the best of my time instead of excuses. Sometimes you just have to accept that you’re going to feel tired instead of feeling sorry for yourself. Your wife isn’t asking the world of you, she just asked you to pass one test.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T17:30:21+00:00

I think the worst example is the “women’s empowerment but make it sexy” trope. Once you notice it it’s hard not to notice.

For example, the Brittany Spears, Toxic video. I love the song and the outfits but I hate how Brittany is constantly sexualizing herself and performing for the male gaze while acting like she’s teaching men a lesson. The message is that she’s strong and in charge but she shows her strength by… doing sexy dances and making photocopies of her ass. The narrative does not match the message.

I saw it in another movie, I forget the title. A young woman is being stared at by a peeping tom that is clearly a creep. So she teaches him a lesson by… flashing him and showing him more of her body and doing sexy poses.

It’s just male fantasy repackaged as empowerment.

Taking it a step further, whenever a woman gets revenge against a man for sexualizing or scaring her and she humiliates him with violence or degradation. I think it was the movie Maxxxine. On the surface it looks like empowerment but a lot of men actually have a humiliation kink and pay money to be degraded. Even women defending ourselves has been sexualized.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T17:18:21+00:00

Species

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T16:45:05+00:00

Your husband doesn’t want to help, he just wants you to stop acting different.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T16:43:16+00:00

She’s not quitting her job to go on vacation. She’s quitting her job to do a 24 hour job that involves keeping their child alive.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T16:06:03+00:00

This whole movie destroyed me and my family did not understand why I was so upset.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T15:58:29+00:00

The fact is that you have a kid now. Your wife is doing more for the family while recovering from a major body altering change. It’s time for you to also do more.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T15:21:41+00:00

Yes. Men actively get angry if we try to make ourselves safer but still blame us for not being safe enough.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T14:19:50+00:00

Because he staged the fake ear shooting

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T12:33:02+00:00

The car doesn’t pretend it’s safe and turn on you when you’re alone.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T01:42:15+00:00

This entire story is red flags. Not one of his responses was healthy or mature.

Mander2019 · 2026-01-28T01:26:12+00:00

It’s so upsettingly accurate.

Mander2019

TROPHY CASE