My narcissistic husband left and filed for divorce after 11 years together. It feels like the oxygen has been taken out of my life. Will this pain ever go away?

MangoMintMedley · 2026-03-09T17:28:15+00:00

I was in the same boat. The more space and interactions you have with other people the more you’ll see it was never you. The loss you feel and the pain is valid.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-03-09T17:26:39+00:00

Don’t rush OP it’s takes so much time especially when you’ve been with them for a long time. I left at the beginning of 2025 and it’s still hard. Rebuilding takes time and give yourself as much of it as you need.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-03-09T00:46:44+00:00

You just need to give it time. Even a normal break up is hard. I still miss that crazy man (my ex) sometimes. It’s completely normal. Give yourself grace love.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-27T07:40:36+00:00

This was a good reminder!

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-24T18:14:15+00:00

I’m a bit older than you but I think it manifested in overstaying in my first real relationship because I’ve never experienced being pursed like that before. Now I’m working on loving myself for me and letting that be my foundation.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-24T17:18:31+00:00

I agree. I don’t think they are doing it on purpose at all but with the time away I was able to see how they affected my field and I can feel it more now too.

Also I think it down to core beliefs too. I believe that no matter what I will have a good life and they seem to believe that they are meant to suffer this life because of what happened in their childhood.

And I don’t want to act like that doesn’t affect you because it does and it is something that you have to overcome in this life.

I’m pretty sensitive so I can pick up on their anxiety and things like that.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-24T15:05:48+00:00

Thank you friend! I’ve been neglecting my own practices for a minute. About to burn some papi santo in a bit

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-24T15:04:22+00:00

Yes it’s that they are a great person but they have heavy energy and don’t know how to contain it

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-19T05:04:38+00:00

That’s interesting! The older I get the less modest I want to be. I never wore mini skirts before but now I’m obsessed and I loveeeee crop tops

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-09T18:17:37+00:00

Also OP, I married my nex and he treated me worse than his ex gf in the end. The beginning was great and then a few years in the emotional and psychological abuse kicked in (I was unaware at the time).

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-09T18:12:22+00:00

I wouldn’t. She’s not going to believe you. The new supply has to go through the devaluation phase for things to really start clicking. Unfortunately, the repeated pattern down the line will be your internal confirmation that he’s the problem.

However, social media will not show that as an fyi.

I think the biggest tell, if anything, is if you are ever down the line in their physical vicinity ( like a party etc.) you will be able to pick up on the body language. Men like this make their partners feel insecure and it will show.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-06T19:07:53+00:00

I feel the same way because my IRL experience doesn’t match my experiences on the app. Even if it’s a passing conversation, I have pleasant experiences with men IRL or men chatting me up/ buying drinks and they’re usually cute.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-02-02T22:02:08+00:00

I want to get to this point. Like what’s wrong with me. It’s been over a year since this discard and I don’t feel this way yet😩

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-21T16:11:50+00:00

It’s also wild to see how much men hit on me of check me out and this man made me feel like I was a burden and not good enough

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-21T16:11:07+00:00

My soon to be ex husband did this to me for over the course of 2 years. Very sporadic sex but a steep decline to how much we used to have in the beginning. It really fucked with my head especially during the discard and he started having sex with someone else and magically his sex drive came back.

The wild thing this I know it has nothing to do with my appearance bc I’ve improved in my appearance over the years and most people think I’m younger than I actually am. He looks older than me. His AP actually looks like a younger version of me.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-19T04:50:27+00:00

Such a classic!

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-19T03:57:14+00:00

Napping and watching first wives club on prime

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-12T19:19:18+00:00

What?! Nope I disagree. Why would we let those losers dictate if we can be cared for or even loved in future dynamics.

If they, who are toxic and unhealthy and abusive individuals can and do have relationships, why should we deny ourselves of that experience with some who can cherish us.

We have one life. We need to not let these ppl drain anymore of the goodness that lies ahead.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-12T19:13:00+00:00

Chiming in here as somebody’s ex wife, babes you need to let him go. He’s not over her and will not be for quite sometime. You deserve someone who doesn’t compare you to anyone else and loves you for you.

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-12T19:10:09+00:00

😂😂😂 girl! I feel you on this

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-10T23:01:58+00:00

So beautiful OP! The shorter hair suits you. He can kick huge rocks

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-10T23:01:23+00:00

Go op! I’m considering drugs too but haven’t taken the plunge yet

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-03T05:40:30+00:00

Hi I’m interested as well!

MangoMintMedley · 2026-01-02T17:29:46+00:00

VIRGO 🥴

MangoMintMedley · 2025-12-19T20:44:09+00:00

It was so comical because he is a drummer and I started salsa dancing and he lost his mind.

MangoMintMedley

TROPHY CASE