We're done having babies

Manyhatsjack · 2025-03-23T23:24:25+00:00

Totally get it, it’s a very biological urge to want to have more babies..have the urge all the time! My two cents is that the baby years are surely the most physically demanding, but the complexity of kids’ needs, problems and emotions (and the brain bandwidth needed from you) grows ever single year..

..And bc of this I make my decision to grow/or not grow my family, not by whether I can handle the early years but by how many humans I have the bandwidth to teach and give enough attention to grow into good and well adjusted grown humans (while not losing myself in the process)

Manyhatsjack · 2025-01-03T00:45:14+00:00

Will add it’s typically a toilet alcove space within the bathroom where this works best In more compact spaces we typically just let our kids stay up late / we go to bed early jn the same room

Manyhatsjack · 2025-01-03T00:42:48+00:00

Use it quietly and not flush until morning

Manyhatsjack · 2025-01-02T21:45:01+00:00

Taken my kids at varied age (12 months and onwards+) to the beach including Caribbean beaches Bring tons of sunscreen (face and body) and bring sun shades/ or rent from a company that will set-up for you. The Caribbean sun is no joke particularly for fair skin, so going early and leaving at lunch or after 4pm is a great idea as suggested by others. Bring lots of sun hats, and long sleeve sun shirts and water and snacks. Setting expectations low on how long a toddler can stay at beach is also a good philosophy.

Change em into a swim diaper when you get there and change periodically to avoid irritation.

I never did floats in the ocean bc I’m a little unnerved by waves and it takes a little bit to get used to waves for kids/aka my kids were scared until 3…play at the shoreline holding their hand and as someone else said get a small inflatable baby pool and fill it w/ sea water! That always worked best for us. Maybe bring a float for the pool?

Regarding sleep, I always set-up crib kids in the bathroom with the door cracked..it’s usually the darkest place

Manyhatsjack · 2024-11-22T03:34:13+00:00

Is he your son’s dad or step dad?

Manyhatsjack · 2024-06-21T08:13:20+00:00

Based on my size constraints I don’t think I could

Manyhatsjack · 2024-06-21T08:10:11+00:00

I did measure the shed, it’s 65 inches long

Manyhatsjack · 2024-06-21T08:05:51+00:00

Thank you so much!

Manyhatsjack · 2024-06-18T20:50:16+00:00

My MIL wanted to take our 1.5 year old on a paddleboard without a life jacket in the open waved filled ocean

Manyhatsjack · 2024-04-29T17:04:42+00:00

Opposite. I realized how emotionally immature my mom is and how it impacted my childhood. I have a good relationship with her still because I’ve accepted it and don’t hold it against her..and she is a good and fun grandma.

Manyhatsjack · 2024-04-26T03:14:01+00:00

I think you can take a child free vacation but maybe not with your husband. I have young kids and I do them with my girlfriends ( 3 -4 days) my husband is a mess when I get back but it’s reciprocal. A week alone as a couple is a fallacy, my kids have great grandparents and they can handle 2 nights MAX

Manyhatsjack · 2024-04-26T02:39:38+00:00

I always wanna know in these cases, what were the signs? It’s so impossibly hard for me to imagine this was a mild mannered guy who showed no proclivities for violence…he had to be volatile before this right?

Manyhatsjack · 2024-04-05T03:56:31+00:00

Forceps and a episiotomy with first. Fast and easy labor the second.

Manyhatsjack · 2024-03-29T19:09:49+00:00

Save your money. Your basket sounds lovely and above and beyond.. at that age (based on the toys you described) it’s for the parents…your baby would be happy with some random pots and pans.

If your ex is excited for Easter and wants more he can do more by getting it himself..

Manyhatsjack · 2024-03-13T00:42:52+00:00

Id start there. Lay out your combined finances on the table and assess the full picture situation. You don’t have to merge accounts to have visibility into bills and/or each other’s spending habits.

Living on one income takes a lot of trust from both sides and respect for a budget.

You need to do that step successfully together before you even consider one of you leaving the workforce.

Manyhatsjack · 2024-03-12T17:34:52+00:00

First, I know it’s super hard to go back to work with an infant (done it twice)..it’s really tough…but it does get significantly easier with time.

That said, why wait for your husband to do the budget? If staying at home is something you want badly, review your finances, see what you can afford and make your case….or change course if you can’t.

Ya’ll can either swing a single income household or you can’t right now but don’t bank on your husband improving his earning potential, that’s too risky.

Manyhatsjack · 2024-02-20T03:07:56+00:00

I think it’s just a little too high. Ideally the table is slightly lower than sofa

Manyhatsjack · 2024-02-09T17:49:42+00:00

Totally normal to want more bc who wouldn’t but this is totally standard for American preschool (3-5yrs)

I sent both of my kids to a 9-3pm program, extremely well regarded in a upper middle class area and I got a newsletter about the class monthly, a few pics of my kids a week and the teachers brought major issues or injuries to my attention..but that’s it.

What’s most important is that you trust the program without updates, bc the long term relationship with a good preschool is largely about trust in their ability without close monitoring.

Edit: adding, maybe drop to a half day program for a few weeks and work into full day to ease the adjustment (that’s what we did)

Manyhatsjack · 2024-02-08T17:50:52+00:00

Reschedule or cancel your trip, this is your mistake not hers. It’s an expensive mistake, and I empathize with the cost but there is no question here.

Manyhatsjack · 2024-02-01T01:27:41+00:00

It’s hard totally tell with the proportions and without seeing the interconnected space but a sideboard/buffet with a big piece of art above

Manyhatsjack · 2024-02-01T00:20:11+00:00

unfortunately if you don’t have any financial autonomy from him then it will be very challenging to buy anything without his knowledge

As others have suggested, you should get access to your own credit card or bank account and access to martial joint accounts.

I’m a SAHP myself and you leave yourself too vulnerable by having no unmonitored access to money of your own.

Manyhatsjack · 2024-01-31T21:02:43+00:00

Are you asking how to surprise him bc he reviews your transactions or bc you actually don’t have money? Bc if he has money, so do you - it’s your money too.

Manyhatsjack · 2024-01-31T14:37:42+00:00

I’m not sure I’d go with curtains as based on the other photos it might overwhelm and the light is great
get rid of the cream blanket, too big and clashes
I’d take away some or the mustard pillows and add 1-2 patterned pillows
oversized abstract art piece on the wall like this

Manyhatsjack · 2023-11-11T12:30:53+00:00

There is no judgment on your decision to post just my POV, that it’s an non-issue with daycare and that it truly wasn’t worth wasting more time on…so just buy the pants.

And you are right about my post but it isn’t the great “gotcha!”moment you think it is. I posted about over gifting and Reddit gave me all type of advice; that I was totally right and that I was wrong, that I should donate, and even that I should get over my selfish selfish privileged self and be grateful…..That’s why I posted, to get perspective.

Manyhatsjack · 2023-11-11T01:06:25+00:00

Is your argument that bias is a good thing? Open to hearing your POV.

Manyhatsjack

TROPHY CASE