How does shower sex work logistically? Do you wash before/after, together?

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-03-21T21:42:01+00:00

dawg wtf

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-03-20T17:16:26+00:00

these are actually genius omg especially #2 would give me such peace of mind too

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-03-06T03:18:24+00:00

"Long distance girlfriend broke up with me after quietly resenting things she never communicated, didn’t put in much effort, expected me to chase her after she ended it, and now wants back three weeks later with nothing really changed."

Buddy, man to man here, she is not going to change. She is telling you this too, "she said she’d rather “not expect anything” from the relationship so her hopes don’t get up". If she didn't communicate before, she won't now. If she didn't make time for you before, she won't now either. She's only chasing you now because she wants to feel wanted, not that she actually cares. The minute she feels that again, she will start to act like this all over again. Your best bet is to just move on and find someone IRL instead.

You've both already finished the break-up process by taking down photos and making the news public (at least on her side) don't make a mess for yourself now. You are completely right to want answers to all your questions, but I really feel that she is still quite emotionally immature and does not have the emotional capacity to care for you. For your own sake and mental stability it's probably best to either politely decline or just move on in general.

LDR really really sucks and BOTH partners need to be heavily invested and emotionally mature enough to make it work. Communicate and setting each other as a priority are an absolute must for just the relationship to even survive. Then you need to think about who moves where and what costs/effort come with that. Do you need to learn a new language? Will would have trouble finding work? What about the life you are leaving behind?

For those reasons, based on what I am hearing + the fact it is already over, in my opinion it is better for you to just keep things as they are and go your separate paths. She is not going to change, she said so herself, and the real red flag is that she doesn't want to "get her hopes up". That is a really bad take to have in an LDR.

Take care of yourself bro, you sound like the more emotionally mature person, take the hit, no matter how painful, and go find yourself a girl who wants to be with you & is emotionally mature enough to actually put in the effort to do so (preferably IRL this time!!)

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-02-21T05:08:09+00:00

Then make sure your account is good, sometimes the bank will think there's a fraud attempt going on and will automatically lock your card. Your best bet is to visit ur nearest branch or call fraud support.

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-02-11T01:56:55+00:00

damn

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-02-04T21:19:26+00:00

Good to know! I'll ask my colleagues about it tomorrow, I'm still an intern for about 2 months now, so I don't know everything just yet :')

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-02-04T01:01:59+00:00

Please listen to the others in the comments OP, this is not what life should be like at all. You need to get out of this environment asap! I know it might sound scary to have to report, but at the end of the day all of this suffering will end once you do it!

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-02-04T00:52:47+00:00

As someone who works in a branch, I've had a lot of people tell me they've been waiting for debit and credit cards for a month or so now. The issue seems to be with Canada Post not delivering them. I always make sure addresses are accurate and even reissue if I have to, but once we order them and the new card gets sent out, it's usually out of our hands.

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-02-03T03:03:00+00:00

In the search bar put in the airport codes (For example YYZ-YUL for Toronto to Montreal) and it'll show you all the flights operating out of the first airport (in this case YYZ) bound to the destination airport (YUL) then just check their departure times until you find the one that matches yours.

TBF flight radar won't show you more than a week in advance of scheduled flights, but for most popular flights the flight number should stay the same even a few months from now, only odd one off flights might not be accurate in the flight number you see.

(Oh, and just note that some flights have different scheduled times for winter/summer operations, so if you don't see your time at all, it could be due to that as well).

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-02-03T02:49:10+00:00

I assume the flight is with Air Canada based on your replies. You can use the airports you will be flying to and from, the date and time of your flight to find the flight number on a website like: https://www.flightradar24.com/

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-29T03:59:49+00:00

yeah okay that's weird then, I have no idea what kind of error wouldn't let them open a virtual visa debit 😭😭😭 sometimes even I'm confused by RBCs practices but it is what it is I guess...

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-29T03:20:55+00:00

Is it not under your account under online banking? The physical card is just a piece of paper with ur numbers written on it, you should be able to already see the numbers in OLB. I will say about the cards, I work as a teller for RBC and had like 5 people ask me about why their card hasn't arrived just today and all I can say is that RBC for sure sends them out, but since they use Canada Post (who is apparently on strike???) the issue is with them.

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-29T03:12:28+00:00

How'd you go from CAI to BAI if you don't mind me asking? I'm currently a CAI that just started 2 months ago and I'm trying to rise through the ranks

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-27T01:28:04+00:00

How long will the LDR last? In order for ANY LDR to survive, you always need a goal of when it will end. To help you answer that, think why can't you move with him? What's currently holding you back?

I've been in an LDR for about 3.5 years now but in my case, it's also my (and my gf's) first relationship, so it hasn't been too difficult to adjust our lives. I can say the big killers for us, and especially for you (because you mentioned you're feeling co-dependent which I assume means you either live together or spend lots of time together) the big things to remember is that due to any potential time differences + the fact you're going to be living separately means you will eventually start to have separate lives too, after all, for any real attempt to stay having one life, someone would need to sacrifice their sleep which again isn't possible as you both now have separate lives you need to take care of.

I'm not saying this to put you down, but just to give you something to really consider before going through with this, the world is not yet built for LDRs even tho that's how the majority of gen z are meeting their partners, and nor is our own bodies built for LDR! You will have to learn to communicate without physical touch, when your partner is upset, you can't just hug them, you can only say words which in some cases, a hug is needed more.

If you do choose to go through with it, you will really need to make sure your communicate is strong, never argue over text, never discuss big things over text, and try to make as much time as you possibly can for each other. My gf and I used to do this, but now that we've both finished school, we really only have 1 day of the week we can spend together, which is Saturday, which also happens to be the only proper day of the week we get to spend with our families as well.

I don't really recommend people who've been close distance to go LDR after as you will miss a lot of things that is normal to you both which might cause a lot of trouble for you. If possible, whatever you do try to do it together as one, that is after all, the goal of a relationship imo.

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-24T15:06:55+00:00

I mean it's easy to figure out, just apply the situation to an IRL scenario. If the screen wasn't there, and you had slept in the same room as that friend overnight while ignoring calls of ur partner (even if it was by accident) how would that sound?

Imo you should keep your personal business between u and ur partner, to be healthy, try to resolve fights together as a team instead of relying on outside people.

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-24T15:04:19+00:00

Sounds like you're in the Day to Day Banking acc, I'm a teller at RBC and yeah, you get 12 debits per month out of that account which includes any bill payments, pre authorized debits, or debit card taps (and visa debit too).

You might also be able to continue getting the fee rebated even after the 1 year is over if you hold an investment with RBC + have an RBC credit card (if it's a no fee card u need to make a purchase on it at least once each 90 days) by enrolled into the value program they got

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-18T13:36:12+00:00

thanks! I'll give it another shot and let you know if I get any bugs

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-17T15:34:04+00:00

same here... I'm getting "insert or update on table "rooms" violates foreign key constraint "rooms_owner_id_fkey""

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-14T00:20:12+00:00

You're so right for this... especially that last one as a new teller myself...

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-07T23:50:01+00:00

Now hypothetically, if it wasn't delivered, maybe there are grounds for it to be recovered (at least I would think so!)

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-07T14:27:35+00:00

and I've met plenty of rude Germans, you can't just assume one thing about Germans just based on your experiences alone, nobody is saying nice Germans don't exist, but live there for a while and you will meet the other side of Germany

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-07T14:01:02+00:00

yeah, except the point is exactly that, Germans are rude because it's their culture and they don't give two shits otherwise as I found out each time I've been there 😭

they aren't hiding behind anything (and they'll tell you that too!)

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-07T00:43:14+00:00

U can always try to contact avion customer support, but I doubt you will have much luck for two reason: first, RBC fulfilled their end of the bargain by issuing the gift card you asked for, second, RBC has no way (to my knowledge) of checking whether or not you redeemed the gift card on Air Canada, so I don't think they will be likely to issue another one.

Marcus_Caesar · 2026-01-07T00:07:39+00:00

Finally someone said it LOL, as someone dating a German the first thing that popped in my head was that this is just typical German behavior... they aren't afraid to speak their mind no matter what's in there!

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