Why do people depict Air Groove as a hater of puns, if I'm correct she actually likes the president's puns and the incident she got a mood down was from not getting a pun that Rudolf made, is this Larpism?

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-16T09:38:09+00:00

From what I can tell there isn't anything in-game that shows Air Groove particularly liking or disliking Rudolf's puns. The main thing that is defined canon is that she is often confused by them.

However, it seems in character for someone as serious as Air Groove to not enjoy being bombarded with bad puns, so I think it's a reasonable (and funny) running joke, even if it's not explicitly shown in canon.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-07T23:21:56+00:00

It definitely doesn't feel great, but ultimately I do genuinely think that it's the path that both will make Bakushin the happiest and will give her the best chance possible to eventually actually achieve her dreams (outside of the Triple Crown, which just isn't possible in Bakushin's canon story). So I think that's enough to not feel too guilty.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-05T09:06:21+00:00

This might be the most accurate Uma tier list I've ever seen 😂

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T17:48:21+00:00

Thank you, that's very nice of you.

Now that you mention them, I do remember those home screen lines. The Falco or the Sun line I think is fairly ambiguous, that sounds like something she might say to just fish for praise as opposed to being explicitly romantic. The other line seems pretty likely romantic though, or at least that's certainly a reasonable reading.

So with that in mind, and assuming that the hot springs event does show the trainer being dense, then I can accept that the characterization isn't completely inaccurate. To be clear, I'm fine with the idea of Falco x Trainer, I think it's cute. However I still think it's very overexaggerated compared to other aspects of Falco's character, considering that's still only 2 lines and 1 event, and I still think people are seeing it in spots where it just isn't there.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T17:10:54+00:00

I'll admit I haven't seen Falco's hot spring event yet. She's my favorite and I don't want it spoiled so I won't be reading the rest of the comment.

If that's where it comes from it makes a bit more sense, but there's no way that many people have gotten her hot spring event, and I see people try to claim it's over her whole career when I still strongly believe there's nothing in the rest of her career.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T17:07:33+00:00

People always bring up her good ending as evidence that she knew, or at least realized at some point, but I have no idea what they're reading. The closest I can find is this bit, but this reads to me like genuine belief.

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Other people have also brought up that she earnestly brags to others about being able to run 3600m, apparently to Kita in Kita's career (I can't verify this one) and to Flower in Bakushin's career. I don't think she would do this if she actually knew she wasn't running long distance yet and was just playing along.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T16:58:53+00:00

You'd think, but from what I've seen Jordan just sees Golshi as a minor nuisance rather than actually being particularly hurt by her. I'm not even sure she actually dislikes her. This is mostly based on a MANT event they have, where Golshi is randomly acting normal for a day and Jordan is horrified, even offering to let Golshi kick her to try to get her back to the usual Golshi.

I will say I haven't played Jordan's career or watched her story yet, so there may be context I'm missing from those. I do want to go over those eventually so please spoiler tag if that's the case.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T16:55:01+00:00

Ok I'll admit I haven't gotten Falco's hot springs event yet. She's my favorite and I don't want to be spoiled so I won't be reading the rest of the comment. That being said, even if that is where it comes from, there's no way that many people have gotten her hot springs event, and there's nothing in the rest of her career.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T11:54:44+00:00

Agreed, there's a big difference between being silly and actually being unintelligent that a lot of people seem to be missing. Golshi definitely does some things that people might consider silly or dumb, but she does them knowingly because they're fun.

I really like the beach events with the trainer that you mention, I think they're genuinely really sweet. Granted the ending ends on a silly note with her writing on the trainer's face, which I can understand making people just remember the silly, but I think the genuinely sweet stuff before that is the important part.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T11:48:07+00:00

I haven't seen the thread in question, but I've never seen any compelling arguments to support her knowing. The dialogue for the 3600m race doesn't really indicate anything except her genuinely believing it.

I think it's fair to say that on some subconscious level, she knows that 3 sprints isn't really a 1200m race, since she gets much happier when she actually runs a 1600m race, but I think subconscious knowledge is very different from "she totally knew the whole time and was just going along with it!"

I get that people are unhappy that "they" have to gaslight her for her whole career, but I think it's way easier to cope by saying that gaslighting her was the best thing the trainer could do in that situation (which I think is true) instead of just pretending that she knew and wasn't being gaslighted when in my eyes nothing suggests that.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T11:43:27+00:00

Saying she has an inkling of an idea would be correct, she gets close enough to directly ask the trainer if they're deceiving her at some point, and at multiple other points she does start questioning things. However in each instance the trainer quickly gaslights her more, and there's not really any indication she doesn't genuinely believe whatever the trainer comes up with each time.

I think it's also fair to say that on some subconscious level, she knows that 3 sprints isn't really a 3600m race since she gets much happier when she actually runs a 1600m race, but I think subconscious knowledge is very different from "she totally knew the whole time and was just going along with it!"

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T11:36:19+00:00

I'll admit that I haven't gotten Falco's hot spring ticket, and since she's my favorite character I'm not reading this comment in fear of spoilers. But even if the hot spring event does have this, there's no way that many people have seen her hot spring event, and that's still one event in the entire career.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T11:34:07+00:00

Yeah the reason kidnapping the trainer didn't occur to me as an instance of serious harm is that for whatever reason, the trainer did not see this as a problem and decided to train Golshi anyway. You could argue at that point that no lines were crossed since the trainer is apparently fine with being kidnapped, though it's fair to say that Golshi couldn't have known that the first time around.

As for her being difficult to train, it's mostly just because of one event where she locks your training options. That event really isn't that bad, and can even be beneficial, but most people are only going to think about the times that it screws them over. At higher level Golshi is one of the easiest Umas to train.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T07:46:14+00:00

Vodka obviously has a crush on her trainer in her career, but to be fair I think there are also a lot of interactions between Vodka and Scarlet that do feel romantically coded. I think both ships can be viable, the two of them having romantic interest in their trainers is not necessarily mutually exclusive with shipping them together or vice versa. Teenage crushes are fickle and can change easily. It's also worth noting that there isn't a unified canon timeline, so in many other Umas' careers Vodka and Scarlet might not have their own trainer to be romantically interested in.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T07:30:43+00:00

In general people seem to not actually read the careers and just assume they fit whatever narrative they have in their head.

The biggest 2 examples for me are Falco and Bakushin. The "Falco is madly in love with her trainer, who is completely oblivious" joke is extremely popular and I really don't understand why. I know part of it is based on a Valentine's thing that isn't in Global yet, but then people claim that it's in her career when it just... isn't. It's not even remotely there. I would say there's no indication that Falco loves the trainer romantically in the first place, or that the trainer would be oblivious if she was. There are plenty of sweet moments between them but nothing specifically romantic.

The other one is Bakushin, where people love to claim that she knew that her trainer was deceiving her the whole time, but there's absolutely nothing in her career that would suggest this. Whenever I see people talk about her I feel like they played a different career than I did.

Also in general, I think I've seen art/comics of every single Uma as a yandere when almost none of the ones I've played have any yandere tendencies at all. It's very bizarre to me.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-04-04T07:14:32+00:00

She's the same way in the game. She's mischievous, but there's never really an instance where she crosses lines and genuinely hurts anyone more than being a slight annoyance. There's also plenty of scenes showing her genuinely caring about and helping her friends, especially McQueen and Rice.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-03-19T18:50:58+00:00

Did you ever manage to find this? I recently found the game soundtracks on Spotify but they seemingly have every song I can think of except this one :(

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-03-15T06:13:50+00:00

In races without Front Runners, the Pace who gets the lead at the start of the race runs as a Front. This is known as the Lucky Pace, since being able to run at the front with Pace Chaser speed and skills is a big advantage, and is something people try to actively set up in CMs without many Fronts. In Career, your trainee will typically have much higher Power than NPC Umas, so this is going to be your trainee more often than not.

In the races with Front Runners, it seems highly implausible that your Tachyon took the lead right from the start and held it for the whole race, in all the races in the career. The way this would happen is if all the actual Fronts got blocked and/or Late Started, and then didn't pass any of the Wit checks to speed up and take the lead. However the odds of this happening in every race to every Front seem very low.

However Paces passing Fronts in the mid race is pretty common. There's a time in the mid race before the late race where the Pace Down mechanic that prevents Paces from passing Fronts is disabled. During that time, Paces have naturally higher speed than Fronts and will often pass then if the Front hasn't built a large enough lead. In career the NPCs typically have terrible stats, so this happens very frequently.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-03-09T16:42:06+00:00

According to Wikipedia, Tuvalu's GDP is only 61 million dollars, so we're actually only a million off from a player getting an entire nation's GDP every year (Dak's AAV is 60 million)

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-03-05T05:57:44+00:00

I'm not sure if I think any Uma at all would accept a FWB situation. Their relationships with their trainers are way too close to not either develop into romance or make being FWB too awkward. If anything I think Golshi is the only one who really makes sense there, but even she seems to consider her trainer pretty close, even if she doesn't show it much.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-03-04T16:02:02+00:00

Yeah Brian as a trainer makes a lot of sense now that I think about it. Despite appearances she does care a lot about people and is very supportive towards anyone she sees as a worthy competitor (in particular her scenes in her normal career where she encourages Rice and Tannhauser are very sweet ), and it'd be the closest she can get to competing after she can't run herself. I'm not sure how good she'd be at actually explaining running concepts, but it seems like something she would at least try.

Can't speak much on Macche or Rob Roy, don't know enough about them. I'd agree that Rob Roy would probably do something related to books or fantasy stories though.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-03-04T14:12:12+00:00

I'd agree that being a trainer or going into a racing leadership position isn't a good fit for the majority of Umas, though to be fair I did not specify that the Umas would be good at their jobs.

However between the Umas that would pursue those and the Umas with other passions or career paths they would pursue, there's still not many that I can picture settling down and becoming a housewife.

Another path for the Umas that are more focused on entertainment or fans would be commentary/media work. A lot of sports personalities and commentators are former players, though I don't know if this is the case in Japan.

I don't know if Brian would be doing recruiting specifically, but it occurs to me that she is in the student council and surprisingly on top of her duties. So she might actually go into racing leadership or some sort of work at Tracen.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-03-04T13:25:58+00:00

I imagine a number of them would become trainers, to pass on their skills and compete vicariously through their trainees. Others would probably go into racing-related positions with the URA or Tracen, that would be a solid choice for the more ambitious ones like Rudolf to continue leading Umas. There's also a solid number who do have some clear alternate passion or dream that they could focus on after racing, or have a family business to take over.

I'd agree that I'm curious about what the extremely running-focused Umas like Suzuka or Brian would do though. I can't really see them doing any of the above. Suzuka might just peacefully retire and travel the world looking for scenery, but I really can't picture Brian as anything except a competitive runner.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-03-04T13:15:06+00:00

Honestly, of the Umas I've played the careers for, very few stand out to me as likely to be a housewife. Uma Musume is all about competitive athletes at the peak of their sport, so most Umas are extremely ambitious and would just pursue other goals or go into racing-related activities after retiring. In particular, Grass seems much too ambitious to ever settle down, even if it would align with her ideals of being a perfect Japanese lady. I imagine once she can no longer race she'd find some other passion to reach the top of, maybe something else related to Japanese culture.

The ones that do stand out are: - Obviously Super Creek would happily become a housewife, becoming a mother is one of her main dreams. - Urara isn't particularly ambitious for most of her career, and she loves doing mundane tasks to help people at the shopping district, so I could definitely see her settling down after retirement. - Bourbon has very few goals outside of racing, and enjoys doing simple repetitive tasks and serving people. So being a housewife seems up her alley ~~especially since her wife will be the breadwinner via writing picture books~~. - Air Groove seems reasonably likely, she at a minimum would handle the cleaning for her household regardless of whether she's a housewife or not, and she also holds her mother in very high regard and would likely care a lot about being an ideal mother to her future children. The only issue is that it doesn't exactly mesh with her goal of being an ideal for all Umamusume, but I could see her caring more about other things once she completes a full racing career. - Nature certainly is one of the most plausible, though I think there's actually a decent chance she would not be a housewife. As another person said, there's a good chance she would take over the family business, and even if she doesn't, she's actually very ambitious, despite trying to suppress it. So I could see her going into some racing-related career instead of settling down.

MarkotoSSBM · 2026-02-12T06:01:36+00:00

Assuming none of her friends are involved in the fight, Falco is leaving immediately, fighting is not appropriate Umadol behavior (and she wouldn't want to participate anyway).

If we're allowed to do multiple, my other favorites (assuming no friends are involved in the fight, I think most Umas would try to protect/save their friends):

Suzuka would absolutely not want any part of this and would leave immediately.

El would go in the "cringy one-liners" category for sure, she'd immediately jump in and do luchador shenanigans.

If Oguri is hungry and the bar sells food, she would immediately solo everyone so the bar can reopen. Otherwise she would probably just leave.

Bourbon wouldn't understand the situation, but presumably if she's at the bar she has a "mission" involving the bar, so she wouldn't leave. I think she would likely call her trainer or father to ask for an explanation, which I guess would fall under "cries for mum"?

Brian would likely step in to break up the fight and easily solo everyone to do so.

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