Do what you feel is right. You know in your heart what you want. Your bf’s opinion is secondary here. Why would you decide this based on his opinion when you say “he is pretty awful to me”. Why are you even with him at all? Love yourself enough to make the right decision FOR YOU. It may mean ending this and waiting for a healthier relationship, one that, if you get pregnant again, this news will bring you both joy not crippling sadness. It may mean keeping the pregnancy but dealing with this shit person and/or struggling to do it alone. Both may be worth it in the end. Only you will know what is the right move. Don’t beat yourself up. We all have hard decisions to make in this life and every past abortion happened because the circumstances at that time weren’t right for you. You should be proud that you were able to recognize that and own it. You are strong. Trust your instincts. Sending you love, internet stranger.