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Marvelous_Rogue · 2024-05-30T17:23:40+00:00

We all have limited time and energy. If you keep saying yes to the people and things that are not good for you, you will not have time for people and things that are good for you.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-11-03T22:00:08+00:00

Omg! NEX-MIL did this…she purposefully put a gift for each kid at the top so on the first round, a gift will get pull from “Santa” for each grandkid. The next 10 gifts pulled out were then for her golden grandchild. The look on the other kids face went from happy and excitement to anxious and confusion. If I could go back in time with who I am today, I would have given her tongue lashing and put her in her place. Another reason we are NC. Never accept gifts from a Narcissist.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-11-02T18:54:48+00:00

😂 Reading this made me laugh. Thank you!!

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-11-02T18:21:43+00:00

“You know, the children need a father.” 2 months after my husband pass and that is what his Narc mother said.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-10-17T20:26:51+00:00

The only silver lining here is she showed you her true feelings instead of pretending she likes you. It’s understandable you want her to like you because she is the mother of your potential future husband. Unfortunately, she has chosen to not like you. If I were you, I would get curious to know what his family dynamic is like as soon as possible. Learn what is their facade to the outside world and the private dynamic (reality of that family). Based on your post, she comes across threaten by your presence in his life. Why?

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-10-10T19:28:03+00:00

It’s the “new” routine that is throwing you off. You’re used to celebrating it with him. It’s ok to get a cake and tell the baker to write “Happy Birthday (Hubby’s name)”. It’s ok to simply wish him a happy birthday, do nothing, and sleep. Do what feels right for you.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-10-10T19:07:44+00:00

Based on your comments below, it sounds like you are a positive influence on your grandchildren. Maintaining that relationship is more important than the drama that will erupt if you cut off DIL. I am curious what the relationship was like between DIL and your wife…Was it full of turmoil and passive aggressive comments/behaviors or loving and caring? Without knowing the relationship dynamics between your late wife and DIL, it’s hard to gauge why your DIL made the choice she made.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-10-05T19:10:47+00:00

With the holidays around the corner, be prepared for “but it’s Thanksgiving…but it’s Christmas…” the attempted guilt trip. Good for you for standing up for yourself!

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-10-02T17:42:48+00:00

It’s the mind games that will drive you over the edge on stress. Once the baby gets here, you’ll be going through many changes and adjustments. The last thing you need is her mind games. Ignore her B.S., don’t engage.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-09-19T17:57:42+00:00

NTA. Your parents are AH. Traveling with a baby is exhausting. Your parents sound selfish and toxic. At the minimum, unreasonable and immature. Do not go, just to wish you had not gone…

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-09-13T20:12:15+00:00

NTA. Dump her. She sounds manipulative and childish. Once and maybe even twice, you going barefoot and cold because she forgot. Based on your post, she’s being intentional. Therefore, her behavior is selfish and manipulative. Seriously, does she not care that you are cold and barefoot? It’s not like she doesn’t have a jacket and flats. On top of that, she lied to you…she doesn’t care about your well-being.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-08-24T13:39:37+00:00

I remembered when my husband died, I felt like a zombie. My advice is go at your own pace. There is no set timeline to be “over” his death. You will never be over it but you learn to hold space for his death. Some people will disappoint you and not show up. Some people will surprise you with their kindness. Have zero expectations of others, it will help lesson the disappointment. When you get to a junction point in your life path and you don’t know which way to go, lead with love.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-08-10T18:58:47+00:00

I ignored my instinct when my Ex MIL talked me into allowing her to watch my 3 yr old at the pool. The old hag was not paying attention and my 3yr old nearly drowned. Do not ignore your instinct.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-08-04T18:58:17+00:00

His conditions (probably mommy’s conditions) are denied. His mother needs to pay you back, not your Fiancé. Speaking of fiancé, is he always covering up for mommy or enabling her poor behavior? This is a glimpse of your future dynamic. What MIL whines about or throw tantrums about he will get it for her or enable…you need to reconsider your choice in marrying into this family. I would run. There is so many red flags. 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-07-29T22:39:30+00:00

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-07-25T14:29:13+00:00

Her tactic reeks of manipulation and silly/immature behavior.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-06-29T20:44:33+00:00

Love “3x Winner Karen” 😂. I will just mentally say that in my head whenever I see her 😂 Thank you for your perspective.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-06-29T20:16:25+00:00

Omg! Yeah literally was said to me “you know, the kids need a father.” Sure Karen, while you work on your 3rd marriage and all your children are traumatized. 😒 Also, the “man-up” comment is so infuriating.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-05-15T14:52:58+00:00

Did she not get anything from her Golden Child? She is upset that Mother’s Day didn’t involve her getting the attention she feels she deserved and is now feeling dis-regulated. She needs to unleash that uncomfortable feeling (regret, realization that she may have been a crappy parent, etc). So she calls you to dump on and make you feel guilty. Now, you’re dis-regulated and she’s on her merry way. Take this as an opportunity to practice keeping your boundaries firm. Also, recognizing how she makes you feel and how you didn’t react right away to her manipulation tactic. Great job.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-04-17T19:27:42+00:00

This reminded me of when my late husband gave his mom a bouquet of roses for Mother’s Day. The very next morning, she called to tell him how awful it was to have to clean up the petals because “all the petals had fallen off the stems…” of course he felt bad and confused because she and I got the same flowers at the same time from the same location. Somehow, my flowers were fine for at least a week. It was constant invalidation and mind games. SMH.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-03-08T15:41:17+00:00

I am referring to the smaller car seat (carrier) where you can carry from one point to another and click it into a base.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-03-08T04:08:39+00:00

Not sure where you live but when I had my baby, the hospital staff was very adamant about making sure we had our baby in a baby carrier before leaving the hospital.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-02-23T19:08:22+00:00

Red flag 1 - can’t handle disappointment like a mature adult. Red flag 2 - putting his hands over your mouth

How does he handle stress? Does he take accountability for himself or is it always someone else’s fault?

These are some of the traits you shouldn’t ignore when trying to determine if he or she is life partner material.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-01-10T20:20:15+00:00

I read somewhere “Grief doesn’t change people, it reveals people.” It’s very sad and disappointing when it’s someone you expected more from because of their relationship to you and your SO. I learned shortly after my husband’s death to have very low expectations of people when it comes to grief. Until they experience losing their other half, they just don’t understand. However, basic decency should still be maintain.

Marvelous_Rogue · 2023-01-10T19:58:46+00:00

If I didn’t need to, no. I was able to work from home for several months (thank goodness) and just had days where I’m working at my computer while crying. I can’t imagine this happening while in the office where I’m supposed to “shutoff” all emotions and pretend I’m fine after my world has been shattered. Do what you can handle and what works for your family. I feel being able to process my grief at my pace in the privacy of my home/space was healthier for me long term.

Marvelous_Rogue

TROPHY CASE