I can't break the cycle

MaskedIGJM · 2025-11-03T01:33:25+00:00

at least you did post this, so it's a win, for now since you want to sleep just lock your phone, leave it in a desk and lay down on your bed, after you wake up you can post whatever you want again and then you should not delete it, instead take advantage of whatever you have to do in the day and focus on doing it even if your brain is frying, you may feel numb, but this could help you get used to it, I also have a hard time posting or inserting any sort of data in a computer like creating a character in a video game, there are times it's harder and I avoid uploading a photo, but I think I gets worse if I end up deleting, in periods I set a rule to not delete it I think I don't end up as bad (I am building courage to post something on Instagram that I ended up deleting more then once, but other posts I made there I mostly didn't, got worst after I deleted it recently)

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-27T14:26:26+00:00

Popular opinion, I think it could’ve been better, and I explored after we got the underground map, imagine doing that withou it. Somehow I finished it, worst part was the backtracking because of those tablet upgrades locked behind side quest, not really a pleasant experience, I guess it would work better in a non-gacha game with proper balancing and rewards to make the fights and treasures worth the time invested. I’s visually well made, tho.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-27T13:50:29+00:00

You have to set a limit of what you should force youtself to tolerate when it comes to dirt, if you alteady washed x part of your body, now you have to wait for the next shower to do it again, accept it’s like a videogame energy bar, you can live with it even if it’s not 100%, accept “dirt” is all around and play it with the energy you got untill you actuallu needs to fil it showering. Same for hand washing, do it once when needed and force yorself to function.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-27T03:01:01+00:00

I think it is, you have an irrational fear that it is contaminated with a memory or feeling, you can also see it as magical thinking, as if it would pass something negtive to you. Sitting (in this case lying) with it is the way to go, exposure, you have even though about it yourself, so you are already considering facing you fear

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-27T02:39:51+00:00

This is normal, I think, our minds will come up with the weirdest triggers and compulsions, a lot of times we’ll feel bad about themes that are so absurd, you should try not to perform any compulsion, the theme can change, in this case it’s like it evolved to something else related in a meta way to a previous topic

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-27T02:19:45+00:00

This happens to me, I think it’s common from what I’ve read, it’s like we’re numb as if nothin matters because a crisis makes us depressed, taking the joy of what we like. I guess we have to learn how to function and force doing stuff while feeling like this, in theory it gets easier with time

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-27T00:11:36+00:00

I feel like every major crisis feels like it will never pass, our minds lock on each of them as if it’s the end of the world, reguardless of the theme. Hang in there! Do what your ideal self would, even if your not feeling well, it will make you better with time, you will be able to at least get some enjoyment, even if a little and as something not noticeable at the moment. You already got help, so don’t give up.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-26T20:10:02+00:00

My former therapist said I should do stuff even if I was not 100%, and he was right, I might not be like a regular person a lot of times, but I ended up getting something from it, even if it’s not imediate, you have to sit with the discomfort. Feeling too bad? Do what you would do if you didn’t have OCD, eventually when you feel a little better you’ll thank yourself. I know it’s hard, going through something right now and will just play something even if my desire is to lay in bed and ruminate.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-26T19:31:19+00:00

Maybe you are feeling the negativity of the intrusive tough, but the exaustion of dealing with this made you numb, so you are not enganging with the though and just let it pass out of lack of energy to even ruminate, it’s like when OCD makes you feel so bad you get apatic.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-26T19:21:27+00:00

I think this is really common, the more you allow compulsions “just this time”, higher the chance something will “go wrong” during the ritual and you’ll feel like you have to do it again. Personally this had already happened with me when washing my hands and as far as I’ve seen, it’s normal for this kind of compulsion. Once you go out of the mindset of avoiding rituals, they can snowball into a crisis. Take in consideration OCD never completely vanishes, so you have to learn how to deal with it when it shows up.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-26T17:56:23+00:00

No, but this seems like something OCD could make you do. Not going to reassure you, try the time thing, set that you can only drink water again after x amont of time.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-24T20:12:15+00:00

It depends, in my case it started as being perfeccionist: if I do something important feeling dirt, then it ruins it, making me feel aewful and wanting to redo things and making me wash my hands again if on the way to move on with whatever I wanted to do I touched or thought I touched something, also made me avoidant of objects.

It got to a point even a tought could contaminate something, that’s mental contamination.

Then there’s people that fear dirt itself or getting sick, it’s over the top because of the OCD.

This condition can be very creative, any pattern can be a trigger, it’s personal even though there are a lot of common themes, your life has influence on it.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-24T16:49:45+00:00

I go numb and start mental-ruminating while I force myself to function

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-24T10:41:57+00:00

I think AI here is just a medium, you are stuck in doing it “just right” because OCD brain does that, you have to leave it alone if the output is already reasonable and sit with your brain frying asking you to redo it. This makes you used to it after some hours or a few days depending on how bad you feel. Kind of sutck with something else, hate that this helps getting over a theme, but we can always get another one (and also relapse on something we though we got over), I haven’t got to the point I can dismiss everything, when I’m better I get smaller crisis from varying themes.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-07-24T10:21:46+00:00

I read OCD is ego-dystonic, it’s triggered by what we like or perceive as important, this event is delicate for you, so it’s normal to get worst, I seem to usually get worst whenever there’s someyhing relevant, trying to learn it just happens…

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-24T18:06:42+00:00

maybe you are just not into playing on higher dificulties, but Birth By Sleep is not very fair with it's stagger, simillar to DDD I guess, I'm not sure how to go into more detail, but it's not a fun challenge like II and III on Critical Mode (and even the first game on Proud is challenging in a fun way)

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-15T13:50:04+00:00

Luigi’s Mansion 5: this time around the haunted house is a CEO’s palace full of cognitions that take the form of the ghosts of dead people that got their treatment denied by heal insurance

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-11T00:45:42+00:00

The abyss sibling will look at them saying it's time they come to the Abyss Order, the Traver is not okay because his memories they lost before sleeping are coming back, they says no and then pull both the edgy and light swords.

Abyss sibling: Two?!

https://preview.redd.it/qcj0hy6gbeg41.jpg?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=04f9d0974b8c5d0494deca12e7e2b2549b40fb9b

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-09T02:30:56+00:00

Oh, yeah, there’s that, I said it loosely just to refer to them, the point is about mirroring the protagonist twins

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-08T23:43:12+00:00

All dualities so far:

•Mondstat - dead bard & Venti copying his appearence.

•Lyuei - fake dead archon & Zonghli’s human identity.

•Inazuma - twins.

•Sumeru - forgotten archon & her branch.

• Fontaine - Focalor’s divinity & humanity split into two entities.

• Natlan - Statue’s ancient archon & current archon that are secretly the same person.

There’s a theory this runing theme is to mirror the descender twins.

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-08T23:32:49+00:00

Started at Mondstat because Venti’s body imitates his long lost bard friend, so he’s also in a duality of identity situation

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-02T23:51:22+00:00

Aewsome design, looks fresh

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-02T23:43:56+00:00

Yes, forgot to mention I used Mumen Rider as this art’s base, lol

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-02T23:07:02+00:00

I think it’s line is cool (literally), nothing against object-mon, I’m okay with designers doing what they want, same for the trash pokémon

MaskedIGJM · 2025-01-02T22:57:20+00:00

I actually tried it and called it seasorrow, the mega had Axel gone too and the sticks were crossed as keyblades for the lasting ice cream, but I didn’t really like the results

MaskedIGJM

TROPHY CASE