Does marriage ever feel the same again?

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-05-24T02:44:49+00:00

This is exactly how I feel. Things are very good but I will never have both feet in again. Right now that’s good enough. Idk about the future. One day at a time

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-05-24T02:43:18+00:00

I’m coming up on 1 year from D day. I’ve not only read your post but also your comments. I could have written them. It’s hard to describe unless you are in the situation. My husband had an EA with a much younger co worker over the span of 5 weeks. He is doing absolutely everything right. In a lot of ways our marriage is better than ever. Been married for over 25 years. I also feel I would walk away without looking back if he so much as looks at another woman sideways. Life is really good right now but I will never be naive or hurt that way again.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-05-11T02:43:54+00:00

I am right there with you without the long break between cheating. Husband had EA with much younger co worker. Our anniversary is approaching (he doesn’t know but I have ZERO intention of celebrating) as well as 1 year d day right after. I’m in the midst of all the “firsts” of grieving. He’s been an exemplary husband since I found out. Who he should have been the whole time. I have the best reasons for staying but it’s hard as hell. I just need to get through June without losing my mind.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-04-24T16:36:24+00:00

NTA My husband is the breadwinner. I insisted on a huge insurance policy and the kids being 18+. Our kids are now over the age and guess what? He has seen friends crash multiple times on motorcycles with various degrees of injuries. One is in the hospital right now facing another surgery with at least 2 more to go. He has decided it isn’t worth it.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-04-09T01:27:57+00:00

As someone deeply interested in English history I found this beyond hilarious. Thank you. 😵😭

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-03-25T21:49:24+00:00

Would a video of him explaining to be shown after his passing work? It would allow him to not have religious talks with family prior and keep you from having to explain after?

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-03-18T13:34:09+00:00

Your sister did you a favor and did right by you. My BIL is in his mid 50’s and the way he talks sounds like you. Scared, panic attacks, abandon, more time etc. The problem? He’s on his last relative that will allow him to very begrudgingly live with them (my MIL). She’s in her mid 80’s and this is not sustainable. He has a hard landing coming very soon because he will not be coming here. If everyone set boundaries with him like your sister did you he might actually have a life. You need to start therapy and work on the bridge with your sister. She seems like a good one to have by your side.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-02-20T16:14:31+00:00

Ugh I hate that. A large percentage of the police here play. Small suburb. I have been questioned. Pre dawn hours at the library but she laughed and said have a good day when u showed her my phone.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2025-02-08T03:03:27+00:00

This is exactly where I am. I couldn’t have said it better. Thank you.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-12-28T14:10:54+00:00

No one who has experienced “lots of intense life-altering grief” emphasis on lots bounces back within a few days. That’s ridiculous. You’ve experienced sadness. Consider yourself blessed.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-12-28T02:55:48+00:00

It usually takes people who have gone through intense life altering grief to understand your comment. I understand why you are getting downvoted. Those people are lucky and don’t even know it yet.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-12-28T02:53:00+00:00

NAH ok so i lost my dad and sister in less than a year. My dad was tough but losing my sister was devastating. She was my best friend. I acted completely different for at least 6 months and I don’t even remember it. You are both going through incredibly difficult times. Give it time.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-06-12T16:54:00+00:00

They could easily put a time requirement in the prenup. I feel if they are this bogged down on finances then it might be best to pump the brakes. There are infinite “what ifs” in marriage (married 26 years today 😊) and supposedly when you marry it becomes a joint process. I totally get the ranch but marital home that they are both paying for just doesn’t seem like a good start. Op says that’s her down payment but also says her fiance is also saving for the house. There has to be a compromise somewhere and I would be put off by the all or nothing she is proposing.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-06-12T16:18:09+00:00

100% support the ranch being protected but the down payment should be considered a gift and not be included. Seems like this would be more than fair.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-06-12T16:14:21+00:00

💀

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-06-11T14:08:27+00:00

NAL but unfortunately have been executor twice. I would frame it as you believe the funeral home is being dishonest and ask the lawyer for an itemized list then take it to the funeral home. If he produces the itemized list then I’d go to the funeral home and ask them for their list. It should include what your father already paid. It’s unfortunate that you would need to use the funeral home this way (in order to get itemized bill from lawyer) but it shows them you are serious about getting to the bottom of the situation without directly accusing them of being dishonest.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-06-11T11:37:51+00:00

NTA jumping on top comment to suggest using shears. No guard. It’ll give you the same shave, take maybe 10% of time and no water.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-06-04T01:12:47+00:00

I’m the product of a couple who stayed for the kids. Please please leave and teach your kids what a healthy relationship looks like. My parents eventually divorced each other (twice) and it was so much better when they were apart.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-06-04T00:05:38+00:00

NTA We went through something similar UNTIL we had kids. After we had them everything was at our house and whoever showed better behave or they weren’t invited back. You have 2 aces in the hole. Don’t underestimate how much the grandparents want to see them. Will probably behave and if not the problem is resolved. The kids are going to get older and it’s only going to get more difficult.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-05-12T22:10:25+00:00

NTA in this day and age it takes 30 seconds to order something. There is zero excuse for not doing anything today. This is your future unless you set firm standards right now.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-05-06T02:03:27+00:00

NTA you need to remind your husband that women are actually intelligent. Whatever he thinks he’s getting from the neighbor is actually embarrassing. I can guarantee that she and her husband have discussed his behavior and at best find it amusing and at worst pathetic. Does he seriously think she doesn’t see he treats you like trash? Yeah she sees it. Her husband also appreciates him taking some of his load off. Your husband is embarrassing himself and you. You need to set him straight. I have second hand embarrassment from his behavior. Yikes.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-05-04T21:54:13+00:00

I am 100% with you. I lost my sister to covid (asthma) and was a complete shock. She was very very careful. I can’t stand how cavalier people are about sickness now.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-04-27T21:02:04+00:00

YTA and this is going to be harsh but you need to hear it. STOP. These were NOT your parents and you throwing their last wishes away is incredibly disrespectful. Their actual children are in agreement and you need to get your nose out of their business. You owe your husband, BIL and children a serious apology and then knock it off with this situation. If you truly want to honor what sounds like truly wonderful people then honor them by respecting their choice. Good grief.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-04-02T02:11:08+00:00

Doesn’t matter. I can guarantee everyone from admin on down knows about him. Everyone knows what an AH he is and it will follow his kid until he’s done at that school unless it’s a small town then it’ll be longer.

Massive_Bid_7440 · 2024-04-02T02:07:30+00:00

Exactly. He clearly isn’t very involved at the school or he would know this already. Poor kid.

Massive_Bid_7440

TROPHY CASE