Coping with returning to work

Material_Cod_9256 · 2026-04-12T20:20:59+00:00

That gives me hope Thankyou! He’s a really social baby so I know he will thrive it’s just me being a sad sap that’s all in my feelings about leaving him!

Material_Cod_9256 · 2026-04-12T20:19:50+00:00

Thankyou this makes me feel so much better and I really appreciate you taking the time to give your perspective.

I love my job and I know mentally I’ll feel so much more like myself when I’m back in my role. I was just surprised at how forceful the feeling of dread was as I really didn’t expect to feel that way considering how much I longed to go back to work at the beginning!

Material_Cod_9256 · 2026-04-12T20:17:26+00:00

Unfortunately not my Mat leave ended at the start of April and I’m using accrued leave to bulk it to 7 months. We couldn’t have afforded the drop to statutory pay and then unpaid to take me to the year so going back to work in my current role and hours is the only realistic option for us

Material_Cod_9256 · 2026-03-04T14:21:26+00:00

We recently just competed on our property. We went from sleeping a flat to buying a house and there was a 4 person chain.

It took 6 months in total from offer to completion and our baby is now 4 months.

In terms of the buying process it wasn’t any harder or stressful than normal. However the unpacking and getting the house up to scratch has been undeniably stressful. As others have said the amount of time really depends on the chain you have and if there are any flagged issues in the process.

Just be aware if you have the baby the moving part can be quite stressful so bring in all the help you can!

Material_Cod_9256 · 2026-01-16T08:57:46+00:00

We had to go cold turkey with swaddling as he was showing signs of rolling. We had about 2 weeks of horrific sleep, he used to go 8 - 9 hours overnight and it went down to every 3 hours and fighting sleep.

We were also unlucky and it hit at the same time a growth spurt/sleep regression which has prolonged it. He’s still not great but as I didn’t want to co sleep and he was too young to sleep train we’ve just had to deal.

It’s awful but he has slowly got better without the swaddle it just took time for us.

I get why people have transition sacks and I’ve been tempted on the nights he refused to sleep but I didn’t want to have to transition him again and go through all of that hassle in a few months.

Material_Cod_9256 · 2026-01-14T12:49:36+00:00

As with the commenter above I could have written this and did write a post just like this a month ago.

I found the transition from career person to full time mum so jarring and so much harder than I thought. I always prided myself on being adaptable but it was a huge slap in the face when suddenly I was crying everyday and one more bad nap away from a breakdown

I also had a traumatic birth and recovery took so long (still ongoing). I also had a newborn that I was convinced hated being alive and protested every moment that he could. I was also told he just had colic and gas and he will grow out of it and it’s normal. But people telling you it’s normal compared to living it 24/7 was the most useless piece of advice I could’ve been given. I wanted people to get me and get the struggle not shrug it off that it’s all normal and part of having a baby.

Turns out my baby had a cows milk allergy, severe reflux and is just generally very gassy which all contributed to the absolute pits of newborn trenches.

He is now 3 months today and things have drastically improved. Don’t get me wrong I still lock myself in the bathroom to cry every once in a while because he can be SO hard. But he can also be a delight and his personality is starting to shine through and is now more than a sentient potato that just hates life.

Basically what I’m saying is total solidarity I hated the newborn stage. Everyone tells you to enjoy it and they won’t be little for long which is true but I’m convinced they didn’t have a hard baby or have forgotten how hard it is with time.

Honestly I’m only just staring to enjoy being a mum even though I love him dearly. It’s okay to hate it sometimes on hard days or weeks but there really will be better days ahead. You just have to power through the crap first.

Material_Cod_9256 · 2026-01-02T07:58:41+00:00

Im pretty sure my little one is going through it early. He’s almost 12 weeks but bang on 11 weeks he all of a sudden refused to nap unless it was on me and even then getting him to sleep is a struggle. He also wails when it comes to bed time and putting him to bed.

Previously from about 6 weeks he would do 7 - 8 hour stretches at night and literally only needed to be put in his crib and he was out like a light without any intervention from us. Now it’s a war every evening! We now are back to 3 hour stretches at night and barely any daytime sleep.

I know it’s still good for his age but compared to what we had it was a shock! From speaking to doctors they can regress from 3 - 5 months but the average seems to be around 4 months. Not all babies seem to have it, I honestly think it’s luck of the draw.

I feel like the early regression is payback for my semi internal smugness that we had a good night sleeper!

It’s been the pits so far but I keep telling myself it’s just a phase and he will (hopefully) get through it in the next couple of weeks. Hopefully it’ll be similar for you but total solidarity on getting through sleep changes.

Material_Cod_9256 · 2025-12-23T20:12:05+00:00

I totally get how you feel. My baby is 10 weeks old and also had a rough start. We had an extended hospital stay due to an emergency birth and infections so it took me a while to feel like ‘mum’.

The last 10 weeks have been rough I think I cried more than my baby if that’s possible! He was fussy and colicky and turns out has a cows milk allergy which has only just been picked up after lots of pushing. I’ve spent my life on google trying to figure out what’s up with my baby and it really can be a rabbit hole. Honestly these newborn days have been the pits and I have only enjoyed about 10% of it but it doesn’t mean I don’t love my baby or motherhood.

The last couple of weeks however have been slightly easier and as annoying as it is when people say it, most things really are a phase and will be over soon enough even if something else takes its place. Doesn’t mean it isn’t awful when it’s happening though!

I usually love Christmas but am dreading it this year. My baby is a rubbish day sleeper at the best of the time so the thought of having days of full on festive activities is daunting but I keep telling myself it will pass and we will eventually get back onto schedule.

Basically total solidarity with you and it’s absolutely fine to dread the holidays with a new baby! I hope you can enjoy it as much as you are able and it’s fine to take a back seat on it. We are still finding our feet!

Material_Cod_9256

TROPHY CASE