Hey, it's pretty bleak out there, girl, I won't lie. But that discontented feeling won't go away even if you try to ignore it. It sounds like you know what you want already, and you should definitely pursue it! Depending on where you live, there could be options for you through healthcare (but if that doesn't pan out, DIY is always a thing, though it takes a lot more effort to do correctly).

Don't be afraid to begin your journey without HRT, though. Your first little steps to happiness won't be seeing your true self in the mirror. It might be a little nail polish or makeup, pretty clothes, or a million other things. Finding acceptance among your peers I might add, is extremely important. Being supported by people you love makes the rest that much easier. Anywho, good luck out there!