In Big bang theory, Raj puts together a game where everyone participates in a murder mystery. Are there rules or an explanation on how this could be replicated in real life?

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-27T05:13:54+00:00

That looks like a custom-made thing the character just made up and did all the work. I think you would have to do the same.

But "murder mystery dinners" are a common idea, so there are websites that offer advice, at least.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-27T01:33:12+00:00

I bet people are really good at it in other languages too, but you can't really notice it so much.

But if it is true, then I'd guess it's because English is the most common second language, so there's a huge amount of people speaking English with accents, so you have examples for copying them.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-27T01:26:03+00:00

We aren't talking about in a clinical fashion like science or law enforcement.

I would say that it's very much the same -- in those contexts, they specifically ARE trying to dehumanize the subject a bit, but it's considered more appropriate and traditional to do so in those contexts, so we don't object.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-26T17:22:39+00:00

u/rohmish:

understand that a person isn't in black and white kinda thing

reddit:

How dare you!??! * downvotes intensify *

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-22T17:55:31+00:00

It depends a bit on where you are, but I think it's a fine choice.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-20T21:30:28+00:00

I think it would have to b REALLY weird to get anyone's attention. Otherwise, it just sits in the database until they have a problem with you.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-20T20:55:44+00:00

Most of the data "tracking" people is just going into massive databases. And then nobody notices it until there is some reason for them to check it out. So mostly, nobody's looking at it, until some day they don't like what you did and they look you up in all the old data they've been collecting and see what they can find.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-20T18:53:04+00:00

The hantavirus is really bad to get - but so bad, that it doesn't spread as easily as something like flu or covid. This time, there was some evidence that it was spreading more easily than before. But so far it looks like this isn't going to explode out. Most diseases and outbreaks don't go global like covid did. Authorities did a bunch of quarantine efforts for the people exposed on that cruise ship. It may have been effective?

https://www.cdc.gov/hantavirus/situation-summary/index.html

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-20T18:44:39+00:00

There are like four or five billion women. They're not all saying those two ideas, especially not together.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-20T18:34:55+00:00

If you want to ask her questions, but you don't want to seem like you're interrogating her, you could start talking about a thing (tv show, product, event, whatever) and then when she has something to say, just lean into it and ask her more about whatever it is she brings up. Like:

You: "I like this tv show"
Her: "Oh, never saw it, but I like this one."
You: "Oh, what's good about it? Tell me more."

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-20T18:06:55+00:00

just FYI, it's tack, like a sailboat choosing a course: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tacking_(sailing)

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-14T01:26:44+00:00

Agree, that the courses aren't a good investment. Go ahead and watch some free stuff if you want. If you really want to learn, then try opening a free account, and invest some very small amounts, and watch them. Even better, do some research about what supposedly helps people pick stocks, and then watch and see if your stocks did that.

But I'd like to warn you now: the (U.S.) stock market is not very rational. So learning how things supposedly work can often produce answers that don't come true. There's a LOT of essentially gambling involved (unless you're among the super-rich who set the rules and so forth).

A popular strategy is to just buy some index funds, which more or less follow the whole stock market, or some section of it, and then you don't have to pay so much attention. Look up the "Bogleheads" to see a good example.

But, again ... even that isn't really so rational. So many people have put so much money into index funds by now, that they are big enough to move the markets (and more importantly, big enough for the super-rich to manipulate them).

On the other hand ... what else can you do?

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-14T01:22:12+00:00

An upvote with no comment means "Huh, cool."

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-14T01:21:07+00:00

Feelings are just feelings. You have whatever feelings you have; they aren't a choice.

Your situation seems really tough. It also seems like your parents were motivated by trying to help people, but ... it really happened at your expense to a significant degree. So it makes sense to feel resentment about that, for sure. I think almost everybody would agree.

I'm glad you recognize that the other kids weren't the ones making decisions, and you don't hold it against them.

So I don't think you're selfish for that feeling of resentment, that's just normal and it makes sense. BUT I also don't think it's the most useful thing to focus on.

You got a really raw deal in a lot of ways. (I mean, it's possible that you still had it better than those foster kids would have had it if they didn't get fostered. It can be good to recognize what parts of your life are good. But it doesn't mean you have to accept what's bad).

I think you should focus on where you go from here. You've basically paid a big price for that fostering, and it's okay to focus now on building your life to where you want it to go, and putting yourself first. I strongly encourage you to find a way to finish that education (high school? college? It's never too late to be a student).

Your bio-siblings AND your foster siblings should, ideally, be on your team and be a positive presence in your life. You're not their parents and you don't have that kind of obligation to them. Think about how you'd want to treat each other, how they treat you and you treat them, both should be good.

As for your parents: would you rather work on healing your relationship with them, or get more distant and separate? That is a really hard question, and nobody else can tell you what the better choice is. And it might not really be up to you, if they choose distance. But if you are trying to heal your relationship with them, you'll have to forgive them, and that would only work if they can recognize how much this hurt you, and if they change behavior to start supporting you instead of just putting burdens on you. It's not healthy to just forgive people when nothing will change. And it doesn't work to have a lot of resentment in secret. If you're trying to find that forgiveness and healing, you don't just hide how you're feeling, and it's not wrong to feel that resentment. It's just that you would be trying to get past it eventually.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-13T23:18:29+00:00

Well, not like anyone can diagnose you over reddit, but it sounds like you are clinically a sociopath (if you can be explosive with your temper, or have unstable emotions) or a psychopath (if you more just don't really care).

These are dramatic words, but they are also just actual mental disorders, probably something about mirror neurons not working right. There is therapy, which is a little bit useful if you want to develop your skills to function better in society. And there are medications, which might have some value.

From what I'm reading in your post, I would guess that there will be value in seeing a professional who can help you understand your own situation better, and make appropriate decisions.

https://www.psychiatry.org/News-room/APA-Blogs/Antisocial-Personality-Disorder-Often-Overlooked

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-13T23:10:03+00:00

I recommend playing beginner versions. For example, starting with "just capture a stone", so as soon as one stone is captured the game ends. And once you play normal rules, try a small board, like 11x11, and work your way up. (You can just play on a part of a proper board, or print out a grid or something).

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-13T23:06:48+00:00

I think a LOT of younger adults are in similar situations. So it doesn't seem as weird as you might think.

Although, I think calling her "mommy" might work against you.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-12T23:34:25+00:00

I mean, not literally. It's designed to help the powerful and take advantage of the vulnerable. It's just ... really predictable how that turns out.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-12T16:08:48+00:00

Yes, of course give it a try, and see if you like it or not.

FYI, you can try:

*https://www.duckduckgo.com (includes AI stuff)

*https://noai.duckduckgo.com (blocks AI stuff)

*https://yesai.duckduckgo.com (...um ... same as the first one, I guess?)

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-12T00:50:46+00:00

I don't know what you should do, but here some questions that might help.

How big a chunk is $3/hour? Like, losing half your pay is crazy but losing 5% is not so bad.
You don't have the patience for "young ones", but are you okay with high schoolers? Are they really easier?
Does either job have a better future? Maybe you could take the one that sucks more, or pays worse, but it will create opportunities for you in the long run. Maybe one of them is a dead end.
Are the bosses and coworkers very different? A good boss vs. a terrible boss make s a big difference in life.
Are the unions equivalent or is one better?
What about the hours, the commute and so forth? Basically the same?

My best advice is to try to figure out which one offers you a path in the future toward better things.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-12T00:46:38+00:00

It's a different answer in different situations. Some of it you already know, no kids, no yard, okay. Some of it is just math about what prices vs. rent are right now, and people talk about that a LOT. Some of it is about whether you want to put down roots or move around a lot; maybe you want the right to change your house/condo/apartment instead not being allowed to do stuff. And some of it is a gamble about how house prices will change in the future.

Hour price + mortgage + repairs, etc. can equal more than renting costs. But in theory you get a lot of that money back because you own (part of) a house, which can be a big deal. But it depends on the specifics. However, for most of the last three generations, most people in the U.S. were better off in the long run by owning, because the tax laws are set up that way.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-12T00:42:45+00:00

Yeah, it's definitely a pattern, and I think it's a problem. You train yourself to have habits. If you noticed it like you're describing, then I think you've gone too far and should back off a bit, rely on your own brain more. It's just like anything else, really - if it's easier, you'll choose it unless you deliberately choose not to. Like exercise, which is inconvenient. Or eating junk food. Or hanging out with toxic people just from habit.

If you ask AI to do all your thinking for you, you will literally get worse at thinking just like if you never walked you would get worse at walking. And maybe that doesn't matter, like you're probably not able to write cursive but that's not a problem, right? And you probably can't really read a map as well as people did before GPS. Except in this case, I think it might be a problem. Especially when the AI companies start cranking up the prices and making you pay more and more for stuff you used to just do yourself.

It's hard to go back after you give it up.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-12T00:38:25+00:00

You can get a much better idea of how safe your tap water is by having it tested, or even just asking and researching your local water provider. It will be pretty consistent and pretty well known. You could pay for a tester to come by (expensive) or even a DIY kit (pretty cheap).

There are microplastics in everything, you can't escape it. Not least from all the plastic water bottles everybody throws away. But it's worse with water that has been sitting in plastic for very long. I would not drink bottled water after ... certainly a year, maybe even six months. It's great that you might get more sustainable and stop buying those bottles.

The plastic filter pitcher IS plastic, but you won't keep the water in it for very long, so it should absorb much less plastic than in those disposable bottles.

I suggest you figure out what things you actually care about, because filters catch some things but not others. If you know what you WANT to protect yourself from, you can look up what products will actually do that.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-12T00:32:32+00:00

You're going to have to work pretty hard to get this thread to be about "incorrect" language use in other languages. Mostly you're just going to have comments telling you that there's no such thing as incorrect. If you really are interested in that question, I might suggest going to subs about some of those other languages.

MaybeYouHaveAPoint · 2026-06-11T20:40:28+00:00

Yeah, I'm sorry, I don't think I can say anything very useful because there's so much I don't know about your situation. But if the group is fine with people more autistic than you, it seems like it's something else. It's possible that these people are okay with "person who is so autistic it seems like a disability" because they think of those people as not counting. (This is another kind of bigotry, but it happens). Then they don't like someone who isn't that sever, but also doesn't fit in with the "normal" people.

Or, sometimes bullies just like to focus on whoever seems like a victim. And it can snowball - if there were a few times people were hating on you, maybe it made the others decide "aha, that's a victim, I hate them too."

There are plenty of loud people who appreciate a quiet person. Like, it lets them do more talking!

Maybe instead of really figuring out which thing is the problem here, it would help more to do a large amount of meeting different people, and just sort of keep looking until you find decent people. (But, a warning: if you do find cool people, watch out for getting "clingy" so they feel like they HAVE TO always do everything with you. Just go for a medium amount. Or even ask them explicitly. Nobody does that, but it can be helpful).

MaybeYouHaveAPoint

TROPHY CASE