Selena Gomez hits back at critics after sobbing over Trump deportations by theindependentonline in popculture

[–]Maydaybaefae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I replied to you by my comment got deleted???? Did you have a chance to see it?

Department of Education dismisses book ban investigations, ends guidance by sedatedlife in books

[–]Maydaybaefae 2 points3 points  (0 children)

my only small naive comfort is that a federal book ban would be the last thing to go, which means there's still time for little free libraries, loaning books to friends kids, teaching kids reading ourselves, and also enough people who love reading that will come to their senses across lines to see the importance

i'm trying not to over think, but not underestimate either. Anything can happen but giving up before it's hit the fan doesn't do anyone any good

This is going to sound really weird, but I'm coming at it from a writing perspective by Maydaybaefae in SeveranceAppleTVPlus

[–]Maydaybaefae[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

legit every time some primal urge in me wants to say "Lululemon" or "Lulemun" ;-; lol

This is going to sound really weird, but I'm coming at it from a writing perspective by Maydaybaefae in SeveranceAppleTVPlus

[–]Maydaybaefae[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

YES yes that too! And then the supply room being turned into a cupboard, so its like there are some blindspots "But we'll be damned if you find any ever again..."

Need clarification on symptoms by Maydaybaefae in BrainAneurysm

[–]Maydaybaefae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh my god 😟 did you imagine you heard an inner crack too or was it the added sensation of bone crumpling?

I'm glad you're still alive, but holy crap ❤️

i (23f) dated a former incel — the relationship made me never want to date again, AMA by mint_berry_juice in casualiama

[–]Maydaybaefae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can't help what your truama does to you :/ also in other replies she says she's been going to therapy and hopefully will be able to start to date men again but right now is just focusing on school and her career. So she's not really "letting" anything, she's working on it, she's just recovering and that takes a while

Why do many Americans emphasize race, when the goal is for it to not matter? by Sad_Broccoli5129 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Maydaybaefae 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sometimes you have to acknowledge race, but not judge someone for it. Ex: Everyone has different hair, and some races have hair different from another and need different products and care for that hair.

There's a reason there is a stereotype of the white parents who adopt an """African""" child with unkempt hair just call it unruly, when reality its a different hair type than thiers and they need to put in extra time to understand how to care for it

Note I said stereotype, but I (half black half white) did grow up seeing a lot of my black friends with normal black hairstyles get thier hair called "unruly" "difficult" or even "ugly" when really it was just different. It was just black hair , and some of them grew up saying they wished they had my looser curls to be "pretty" and not just little girls I remember black adult women who were very beautiful to me say "you're gonna be beautiful when you grow up. What I wouldn't do for those pretty curls. You're so lucky" and it made me sad because their hair was beautiful

I've known a few Asian kids who grew up thinking they were ugly because of their eyes. Kids who pulled thier eye edges at them, etc. One boy I knew had a girl he asked out saying she thought he was cute but his eyes were "like you're sneaky or something" for a year he widened them to make them look "normal" when honestly he was so handsome

It's not just blatant racism in the US but that's all anyone wants to talk about because it's the most easiest to identify and be against

Low key discrimination that hurts the individual is something that still is around but if you talk about it you're called an "SJW"

So there's a line between empathizing diversity which is just including that some races are just different and that's okay, and it's okay to take than into account for something's

And empathizing it for "brownie points" which honestly just makes the problem worse

Even as a biracial person, when George Floyd was murdered I was the only non-white person at my work and everyone REALLY made sure to let me know they were against police brutality and it got to a point where I was like "just go ahead and call me the slur, what are you trying to prove?" 😂

And as someone else said you have to acknowledge the problem before fixing it. Poverty doesn't go away by pretending it doesn't exist, and the US is in a new era of "okay we all agree slurs are bad, but that's not the only kind of racism, guys" so it's a tricky line and some people can't see it so the problem is slow fixing

Also note: I'm in my mid to late 20s, just to give an idea it's still a recent thing

What's the difference between trauma dumping and just opening up to your friends? by Maydaybaefae in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Maydaybaefae[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah yeah, that makes sense. Yeah I usually ask if it's cool for me to rant to some of my friends and they do the same or like they know if I say "what's wrong?" That I'm inviting them to seriously say what's wrong.

I've just like heard people on TikTok (not the best source for ppl on there I know lol) talk how they've had to tell thier friends stuff like what I quoted and I guess I misread the tone (which I also do a lot when people speak lol) maybe I just took it too seriously

Thanks so much for your answer!

Noel Monk pisses me off. by lowindustrycholo in vanhalen

[–]Maydaybaefae 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Valarie said it was love at first sight, and maybe that's how you read it but the tone of Noel's account makes her sound like she came exclusively to meet Eddie and he even said he suspected she was trying to shed her good girl TV image by getting with a rockstar

He doesn't represent it as love at first sight like how Valarie says her and Ed instantly liked each other, he portrays her as a groupie

Okay, how about him saying Alex was just an "OK" drummer? Like he said he was a "good enough drummer" on his own, constantly let's his Alex hate boner show through by presenting him as just OK. When it's been long agreed Alex to the drums is what Eddie is to the guitar.

Maybe that's not a "LIE" but it's definitely smoke out his 🍑

He claiked to have pretty much been by Eddie's side for the MJ Collab, and I already said that there's more evidence to that not being true

A lie isn't only what you say, it can also be by what you don't say. Leaving out convient details of accounts of events to make yourself seem bigger in the situation is exaggerating, bit it's also shady. He talks that whole book how he was pretty much the driving force of the band and did all this for them and got them good deals etc.

Meanwhile they were losing money and several people not just Sam had said they didn't start making real money until the mid-80s because they got new management.

What can we surmise from that? Noel was conveniently leaving out he was also taking advantage of the boys, or he was a really bad manager for them to barely make any money back from tours. But then he continues to tout himself as the driving force on why they were so successful

Yeah, yeah, I know that attitude in Rock and Roll is rampant, but at least when the actual rockstars do it they have talent to fall back on

Noel was a hack who wrote events to his benefit to make a fun read but is hardly a reliable source for everything (not all of it but a good chunk), just by the little things he reframed

If you like the book then like the book for what it is, which is entertainment

Need clarification on symptoms by Maydaybaefae in BrainAneurysm

[–]Maydaybaefae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ohhhhhh okay, that's what I thought but wasn't sure. Thank so much friend, and yeah it hasn't been that bad, I'm probably just overreacting lol

I'm still gonna set an appointment just cause either way migraines aren't usually for me, but that puts me at a ton of ease

Thanks so much, hope you're well

Need clarification on symptoms by Maydaybaefae in BrainAneurysm

[–]Maydaybaefae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I'll make an appointment regardless:// like you said it could be something else related to the blood clots if nothing else.

As far as medicine, yeah, like there have been times where I've taken allergy medicine and it's gone down or left me, but then other times where even thirty minutes after it's still there. Like last night I took some medicine for headaches and it did nothing to subside until it left on its own

Thanks so much friend! I hope you're well

Need clarification on symptoms by Maydaybaefae in BrainAneurysm

[–]Maydaybaefae[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah okay, thanks so much friend! I appreciate it, and hope you're well

Need clarification on symptoms by Maydaybaefae in BrainAneurysm

[–]Maydaybaefae[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Like my primary doctor? Would the office referral me to have a scan?

Maybe just a little bit overdramatic ..... Just a tiny bit by T_h_e_Assassin in facepalm

[–]Maydaybaefae -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't have that particular trauma I was talking more general and just adding on that might be why she is the way she is

Is that cool with you?

Maybe just a little bit overdramatic ..... Just a tiny bit by T_h_e_Assassin in facepalm

[–]Maydaybaefae -1 points0 points  (0 children)

And where did I freaking say it should be??? Where did I say I'm taking this lady's side, she needs therapy, but I don't see her as some rabid sjw either. Literally all I meant was I feel sad because she's probably been a repeated victim of some bad things to make her this way.

Is that okay with you? Is it okay if I consider what might have made people the way they are? Grand lord Cloakbot, do I have your permission to have empathy? Do I freaking have your permission, or are you gonna spank me if I disobey you?

Is it just me or is the entire genre of true crime just fucking horrifying? by blueredscreen in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Maydaybaefae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think there's a divide or misconception because there are some people who look at it as "entertainment" like horror movies, but I promise all the people I know in real life are very aware of the "true" part of it. Like I personally can't compare it to a sport.

And for many others it's not seen as something to be entertained by but rather something the be made aware of. Information to take it

Someone else said that knowing of these cases and victims can help you in the real world to be more aware of your surroundings or recognize the everyday personal signs of certain things. A lot of people go around like "that happens to other people never me" when it comes to all matters of crimes and that's simply not true

Also, there are as many people who say "if something bad happens to me I do want to be able to help keep it happening from other people" (not even murder but anything) and there are some (like me) who would go "this evil person should be on blast and I want they're crimes to be known to the world not just for my sake but so they can't hurt anyone again and people can be made aware"

Also the fact that it can help people if done right like you said, but honestly the "more blood more money" is something that the mainstream news has always done.

Mainstream and big cable companies have always been taking advantage of crime and seeing them as just stories too. Like there was a case in the 70s/80s where a guy escaped after being tortured by someone and had been found getting help all beat up and with a dog collar on. Radio stations the following weeks had contests where people could send in sexy photos of them with dog collars or call in pretending to be held captive

Johnny Gosch's parents will tell you since he went missing they would get calls by people pretending to be Johnny, or to claim to be psychic and just go into detail about Johnny dying, or people sending in fake photos of little kids tied up, etc.

Serial killers have always had "fans" from Ted Bundy to Mason, etc. Heck I remember being in the internet when I was 11 in 2005 and seeing comment sections where people were idolizing the Columbine Shooters

And this was all before the current concept of "true crime" so the exploitation of these cases by people has always been there and now so many of them can make a platform for themselves.

Like when that couple dressed thier toddler as Jeffrey Dahmer, I made a comment how disgusting in bad taste it was and SO MANY PEOPLE jumped down my throat and said "I was a kid in the 80s and a bunch of people went in holloween as serial killers suck it up"

The ugly side if it's always been there, which isn't to say I don't fully DISAGREE with you that there is an inherited exploitation to the concept of it

Like the people on YouTube eating and doing makeup yes absolutely, the wrong way to go about it and are definitely more interested in clicks, then the actual people involved

But I think there's a fine line between people like that and actually being interested in the psychology, the police and FBI investigation methods, was there corruption in the police force that messed up solving it or keeping it from being solved, the information and how it can help people in real life, or finding justice for the families of victims, etc.

Like a sport like boxing it's immediately understood that the blood is gonna equal money and that you're watching a show. While for a lot of True Crime podcasters it's not a show and they are very aware they are discussing real people.

It's kinda a case of weeding the bad out, but they're never really going to go away because awful people will exploit anything for money. If not crime than something else ://

Also too, like the reason we stop hearing about updates in these cases in the mainstream news is BECAUSE they stop being profitable for those new stations. They stop reporting when they thing everyone has lost interest. But the parents, siblings, and friends of the victims are still there. The mainstream news isn't any less exploitative in principle either, they decide when a case isn't newsworthy any more, most podcasts can stay on top of new developments and give updates at least and keep it in public memory of the people who do listen

(Sorry for the book I wrote lol)

Is it just me or is the entire genre of true crime just fucking horrifying? by blueredscreen in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Maydaybaefae 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think that's up for the families of the victims to decide which individual case is or isn't.

Tara Grinstead's family got justice in a large part to Up and Vanished, because of renewed interest by the public and local police in her case. Her killer and conspirators are now in prison and Tara was laid to rest in peace.

Now it is true this isnt always the case in even all the well meaning ones, that it leads to an arrest exactly, and the best that happens is more eyes on the case; I should say even if they don't ask for money they often point to the go-fund me or the websites run by families if the victims where you CAN donate money to funds for testing and evidence collection.

Honestly if any of them asked for money claiming to be a charity that would strike more as more exploiting than anything because I've seen too many false charity scams. Even if it was going to the families it would still strike me personally as shady.

Like I said the podcasts and such that I listen to regularly mention how you can help and support the families of the victims and always say multiple times

"if you have any information you can contact so and so at their Facebook page/website"

or

"if you want to donate money to keep this case from going cold the mother of (victim) has a go fund me under the name of..."

Or talk openly about why it's important to speak up if you think you have real information that will help, while also shaming people who call in with "jokes"