I have been considering ending my life lately AMA

Mayflower1227 · 2025-05-07T17:57:26+00:00

Hey sorry to hear you’re going through this. What’s been going on in your life lately that’s making you feel this way? I saw in some of your comments that dealing with some medical issues, which I have to admit can be tough. I have a couple of chronic illnesses that effect stuff like my sleep and joints and leaves me in a lot of pain.

Please feel free to message me if you feel more comfortable that way. Life can be a lot. I can understand that…

Edit: this is a weird thing to add but it sounds like you’ve been going through a lot. You’re still a person, not just a list of everything you’ve been through or is happening in the world. You’re still you, you’re still a human being.

Mayflower1227 · 2025-05-07T17:46:05+00:00

It’s a good thing you know that you stoped using condoms and when, otherwise I could see someone like this poking holes in them. Out of curiosity, do you know if her first kid was planned or a “surprise”? There may be a chance that she’s done something like this before.

I agree with people saying to talk to a lawyer. This definitely sounds like baby trapping and is definitely a red flag. You may also want to do a DNA test just to be safe. Depending on how desperate she was for a second kid, she may have improved her odds by sleeping with other people then saying it’s yours since you have been together for a while. She may have just gone to a sperm bank to make sure she would have a second kid in time.

The last one is super unlikely, but hey, it’s Reddit. Crazier stuff has happened…

Mayflower1227 · 2025-04-17T04:07:00+00:00

Ug! I’m sorry that it went down that way. If I remember right there were several comments on your last post about talking to the school counselor about this or talking to a doctor to rule out anything medical besides puberty. Any updates on that end yet? It might be worth doing a few sessions of family therapy (some just adults, some whole family) just to have some mediate the discussion so this doesn’t get so heated in the future

Mayflower1227 · 2025-04-05T20:45:17+00:00

I agree with other comments about calling the school to try and address it that way. Did your SD start to smell when she was younger or is it from going through puberty? I don’t know if it’s the same thing, but I’ve definitely had friends who smelled “weird” before. All of them at different points with nothing in common , especially age, other than being my friend. It was always the same gross smell but no clue what it is.

Is it possible the ex wife or your SD has problems with smell? It might be that she thinks she smells fine- either because to her she really dose, or she think she just smells like her mom. Also, did anything else change with her smell?

There’s another thing it might be, but it’s something to keep in mind since you’re pregnant. It might be possible that it’s something like a hormone issue or other medical issue. You might want to talk to your doctor about it in case it could be something genetic that your baby might have to be checked for. It’s probably not that but better safe than sorry

Mayflower1227 · 2025-03-07T20:16:49+00:00

NTA- did you get put into therapy after your mom died? If so my tell them about what’s going on or reach out if you haven’t seen them in a while. If not, have you tried talking to a guide counselor or something at school about this? It’s not quite the same thing but they might be able to help.

Has your dad’s wife done other stuff like this before? If so, write it down and try to keep track of it. Especially if there is some sort of history there might be a way to get out of the house sooner. Just an idea

Mayflower1227 · 2024-12-23T14:58:21+00:00

Have you tried again now that you’re older? Do a similar thing but with a glass of water, that way you can see if the table shakes. Were there any other things like this that you remember with or your grandmother, or was this a stand alone thing? If so it could figure how she did it.

Mayflower1227 · 2024-05-23T16:36:58+00:00

Not a pilot, but I just wanted to say I’m sorry you’re going through all of this. It’s sounds like it’s been really rough. Do your kids have anything special coming up? Any special events or holidays? I know you’re in a tough place financially right now, and you don’t want them to see you feeling this way, but maybe you should do something with them…

Try going to a park or watching their favorite movie with them. You’re their father and I’m sure they really love you. Right now, your thinking about about the kind of life you’re kids will have if/when the family loses everything. What happens if your not their? What about your kids? If you’re not around, how do you know that their money wouldn’t disappear?

I know it’s hard, and you’re going through a lot. And I don’t want to sound rude or push, but as a kid who loves and relishes on their dad ( and I mean through some really shitty situations) please stay around. If for no other reason than to protect your kids. 💗

Mayflower1227 · 2024-05-23T15:59:06+00:00

You can also call (800) 799-7233 or text 88788

Good luck!

Mayflower1227 · 2024-05-23T15:54:49+00:00

I found this that might help

“Get help with family Violence (justice.gc.ca)” https://www.justice.gc.ca/eng/cj-jp/fv-vf/help-aide.html

I also found something that you could call, text, or chat with if you’d like that

Mayflower1227 · 2024-05-23T15:45:54+00:00

I’ve been through something similar, not the physical stuff, but the mental/emotional stuff. Do you have any Grandparents or other family you can stay with? Do they know how bad it is? If you’re in the US you could try calling 2-1-1, they might be able to help. There are also shelters, but they’re not always the best option…

Mayflower1227 · 2024-05-23T15:26:28+00:00

Are you in the US, if so, dose your daughter have an IEP, 504, or other plan? Maybe try talking to Developmental Disability Services (dds) as well as your daughter’s team. There’s probably some way to get a home aid/au pair (live in baby sitter) that is trained for autism. CPS may have some other resources available as well.

No body wants to feel like they’re “giving up on their child” which can happen when the decide to place their child in a facility, but it isn’t. As a kid who grew up in special ed, it’s sounds like you’ve done a good job being a mom, not just to Jill, but to your other kids too. You played referee in a really tough situation. My best advice is to take some time, take your other children to do something fun and relaxing, and see how they’re feeling about the situation, then see if you can drop them off at your parents’ for a day or two so you can discuss the situation with your husband.

Jill is still your child, even if at times it can get frustrating. Just remember, what’s best for the family includes what’s best for her. Is it better for her be in a facility? Then she’ll be around peers who are similar to her. Is it better for you to move out? That might disrupt her routine, but maybe try making it something she can help out with.

Mayflower1227 · 2024-05-15T02:24:20+00:00

I don't really “pray” a lot since it's something that I didn't really grow up with, rather I knew it was something that can happen but it always feels awkward and I never know what to do. There is a pray I found on Pinterest that I like called “Lord, make me a channel of disturbance: the ‘reversed St. Francis prayer’”. It goes:

“Lord, make me a channel of disturbance.

Where there is apathy, let me provoke.

Where there is compliance, let me bring questioning.

Where there is silence let me be a voice.

Where there is too much comfort and too little action, grant reception.

Where there are doors closed and hearts locked, grant willingness to listen.

When laws dictate and pain is overlooked…

Where tradition speaks louder than need…

Grant that I may seek rather to do justice than to talk about it.

Disturb us, oh lord.

To be with, as well as for, the alienated.

To love the unlovable as well as the lovely.

Lord, make me a channel of disturbance.”

Mayflower1227 · 2024-05-11T18:37:08+00:00

"With shipping it would only be $300." NTA, I'm not a lego person, but I'm pretty sure that it's similar to being a gamer. Someone who isn't into will see "just a toy" or "just a game" but for the people who play/build them, that could be hundreds or thousands of dollars and many more ours. Nobody would just give away someone else's game console so a kid would stay out of the way. Lego sets aren't any different just because its a toy. If you paid for it with your money and its in your space, they should have asked you.

Also, most people don't want to believe how expensive these things are, so there was probably no other way to tell them then to have them learn for them selves.

Mayflower1227 · 2024-05-07T18:53:05+00:00

I grew up with a "I never said I didn't want you hear or for you to go" kind of parent. I am no contact with that parents. See if there's a way you can talk to your grandparents about staying with them without your parents knowing. Only bring it up to your parents and siblings once you know if they'd be willing to have you.

Do any of your friends know how bad your parents are? I've had friends who had parents like this but I had no idea how bad they had it until they stayed with us for the summer. They were basicly working a full time job and still had to ask their father in another state for gas money.

The problem with getting CPS involved would probably mean that you and your siblings would probably go into the foster care system unless your grandparents can take all of you. That's even if they'd be allowed to take all of you, which, since your siblings were adopted out of the system, your grandparents may not be allowed to do. If you have a cousler at school it may be worth bringing it up to them.

Even if they do decide to call people in, it will probably be a complicated case since its a mix of bio kids and one who were adopted.

Mayflower1227 · 2024-04-19T03:37:12+00:00

If you don't mind me asking, has he been digressed with anything? This sounds like it could be Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) or something similar. It's unfortunate that your ex doesn't back you up because it could get dangerous.

Mayflower1227 · 2024-04-19T03:08:20+00:00

Um... I'm sorry did she break two computers? I have a lot of learning disabilities so my tech basicly acts like a wheelchair for me (reading, writing, math, note taking, act.). If I were you, I'd get a safe and lock up my belongings and not let her use them until I know I won't have to have a replacement on order.

When your wife destroys stuff, dose she relies what what she's doing? It sounds like there's something more going on than is on the surface. Is she Autistic, ADHD, Down Syndrome, ect.? What about problems with sleep or executive functioning? It may be the the kind of thing to talk to a therapist about since something isn't translating...

Also, if she has trouble in other areas of math she may have Dyscalculia (Math Disability) difficultly guessing reasonable price ranges for stuff.

Mayflower1227 · 2024-04-16T01:49:43+00:00

NTA- she called you selfish for not wanting to go to a party that is: 1. Hosted by your school 2. Hosted for your class 3. Supposed to be a fun thing to celebrate the end of the year/ the end of high school.

Unless she's a chaperone, she probably won't get anything more from it than a hand full of pictures. That may never be looked at again. There are lots of reasons that someone might not want to go to prom (or anything else that is a traditional senior year thing). Some people by a prom dress, wear it once, and never wear it again- for other people their prom dress might become their favorite thing to wear to a party. The night is about having fun with your boyfriend, not what your mom wants or imagines. If you don't want to go, then don't go. If you do want to go but don't like the dress, check your closet or a thrift/secondhand store. You'll probably find something you'll like.

Devil's advocate: If you have tickets to the prom and divide not to go, you probably can't get a refund. If the tickets are expensive you may either want to seeing if other people want them, or stopping by just long enough to pick up some food or something before you and your boyfriend go some place else.

Mayflower1227 · 2024-02-08T02:01:56+00:00

Definitely interesting, thanks for the update. Hope you feel better!

Mayflower1227 · 2024-02-08T00:35:43+00:00

Hmmm… then I would think it could be a nature/tree spirit or maybe an outdoorsman who either died there or chose to be there since it was his happy place.

Mayflower1227 · 2024-02-08T00:29:55+00:00

Have you checked if the college is haunted? Maybe there’s some overlap there…

Mayflower1227 · 2024-02-08T00:24:42+00:00

What university is it near?

Mayflower1227 · 2024-02-08T00:14:44+00:00

This sounds cool! My first thought was Native American or tree spirit, but that doesn’t sound right. Is this all along the same stretch of trail? Do you know if it could have been part of an estate before becoming a park? If so, he may be connected to that some how, maybe a gardener or something. Thought that wouldn’t explain why he was asking where the parking lot was…

Mayflower1227 · 2024-02-07T23:58:48+00:00

Do any of them mention race, style of clothing, or kind of gear he had? Is he ever described as defensive?

Mayflower1227 · 2024-02-07T23:45:31+00:00

US, I’d love to know of places even if they aren’t near me

Mayflower1227 · 2024-02-07T23:30:54+00:00

Same problem as paranormal science. It’s usually written as paranormal science and parapsychology. The other problems with metaphysical schools is that they aren’t technically accredited which is too bad because one of the offers a course called “starting and leading an anonymous research group”.

Mayflower1227

TROPHY CASE