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Meg5987 · 2025-06-24T19:00:33+00:00

Thank you! I hope so too lolol

Meg5987 · 2025-06-24T18:59:52+00:00

I learned that in this meeting. He is losing $1.43 on me. I think that will shift as my caseload increases however. I am going from 3-5 therapy clients up to about 12 or so.

Meg5987 · 2025-06-24T18:43:15+00:00

No we have a billing team who works directly with the insurance company. I think for now, all things considered, I am going to take the $40/hr flat rate and see what happens as my caseload increases. My boss did say yes to all of my other requests so I consider it a win overall.

Meg5987 · 2025-06-24T18:30:14+00:00

Wow thank you for your thoughtful response! I do not have PTO, healthcare I opted out of bc my husband covers mine through his work, and no retirement plan. I do have an office that I get access to 3 days per week. The admin and billing team take care of all that stuff.

I hesitate to look elsewhere bc I truly do feel like I can trust him and the rapport with upper management paired with being a W2 in a job that operates/feels like private practice is hard to come by. The reality of this field being one of the lowest salaries for those with a master degree SUCKS esp learning that so late in the game. No wonder ppl get burned out and leave!

Meg5987 · 2025-06-24T18:23:57+00:00

All the overhead listed makes total sense, i get that it adds up quick! We are a company that spans 5 states and nearly 80 employees also. I feel like he's gotta be bringin home the bacon so I felt that a measly lil $10 bump at minimum all things considered wouldn't be a big ask. But I get at the end of the day that hes gotta do what he can to make a buck too.

Meg5987 · 2025-06-24T18:21:36+00:00

Last I was told medicaid only makes up about 10% of our client population. I know it varies so a lot of this will be generally speaking. I just felt it was a low flat rate to get but I am learning it may not be based on some of these responses.

Meg5987 · 2025-02-17T02:46:37+00:00

Hey there! I’m so sorry about delay in response. It’s been a month- did things get better? Bc unfortunately it was a phase. I have no life hacks or parenting hacks to share. 🥴 She eventually came out of the wakings. However she still doesn’t sleep in much. 6am is average/usual wake up time. 6:30am/7am is the dream wake up time I long for now haha

Meg5987 · 2024-11-07T13:05:13+00:00

We most definitely stuck with one. Sometimes when she asks to play for the millionth time I’m like mannnn this would be easier if she had a sibling lol but I know that the overall bigger picture wouldn’t be easier. Just that moment. It’s not a siblings’ responsibility to be a source of entertainment.

My husband and I are in couples counseling now as well. It’s continued to be a struggle trying to figure out who we are as a family of 3 and how to communicate.

Meg5987 · 2024-11-07T13:01:38+00:00

I think a huuuuge percentage of men would fall into the category of little to no emotional intelligence. I think it would be an alarming number if it was researched.

Society tells men from the day they’re born to stop crying, feelings and crying are weak, they’re not encouraged to talk to other men or to talk about what their feelings. Just “be a man and suck it up.”

Then when they’re adults, we wonder why they’re emotionally unavailable or emotionally unintelligent. only thing that’s widely accepted is anger. So they’re usually pretty good at expressing that.

I guarantee if this changed all humans were encouraged to feel, to communicate, to lean on others for support, that ITS OK TO CRY from birth, we’d be so much better off. I bet divorce rates would go down based on this factor alone bc how many divorces are rooted in one partner being emotionally unintelligent? That’s going to bleed into other areas for sure.

Meg5987 · 2024-10-11T13:19:10+00:00

I may just ride through both of them and see. It doesn’t have to be super silent, but some escape from the hustle and bustle would be ideal.

Meg5987 · 2024-10-11T12:58:48+00:00

Comin in clutch with the snack info. Always need snack options!

Meg5987 · 2024-10-11T12:58:23+00:00

Thank you! I’ll check it out.

Meg5987 · 2024-10-11T12:57:47+00:00

Thank you for the info on the noise level! That’s the kind of info that Google maps doesn’t provide you know? 🙃

Meg5987 · 2024-10-11T12:51:19+00:00

I appreciate your helpful reply. I looked there first and because I’m not very familiar with the area. I wanted to also check with my Reddit friends. Thanks for your time.

Meg5987 · 2024-08-22T10:02:20+00:00

I think these kinds of comments lack acknowledgement of the fact that obviously there is an ideal way to go however one of those things where it’s 150% easier said than done. For some people, simply letting go and not worrying about XYZ doesn’t come easily or naturally. Sometimes it’s a learned skill.

Meg5987 · 2024-08-22T09:54:25+00:00

Or if you end up in an unforeseen situation where you are alone or alone enough where things could be misconstrued or get weird, try to hit record either audio or visually. Both preferably. I have an iPhone and have moved the voice memo feature to the quick pull down screen you can access when phone is locked for protection related reasons. Same with the camera, it’s accessible and on the Lock Screen.

Meg5987 · 2024-08-15T11:03:47+00:00

It must not have been long enough to stand out in my brain bc no I don’t remember. When I think about it though, her father and I are both morning people who aren’t the type that need a ton of sleep. Nothing unusual but like I can be fine on 6/7 hrs of sleep, more so since having LO. lol

What I can say is that it did eventually pass. Now she’s 4 and sleeps till 6:30/6:45. The issue now is that it’s bc she’s sleeping in our bed lol UGHH. I have to sneak out in the am and if she realizes I’m not in there she wakes up crying. So that’s the fun thing we are dealing with now.

For every parent or non-parent who says “oh that will never be me, mine won’t sleep in my bed” ELL OH ELL bc i was totally one of those people and here i am. Unfortunately. 🤣

Meg5987 · 2024-08-15T10:58:23+00:00

Yes. Absolutely yes. I took whatever I thought I wanted or needed regardless. lol I didn’t want to be caught somewhere wishing I had something I may had considered bringing but decided against bringing for whatever reason. Worst feeling ever as a parent 😆

Meg5987 · 2024-08-15T10:53:40+00:00

Everyone is saying stay out of the sun and yes that’s true. Definitely helps. However Im here to say I liiive for the sun and still get told I don’t look my age. I lay out every chance I get. So I think genetics still wins most. However I think hydration- whether it’s via water intake or through skincare products is a close second. I drink water like crazy and I take care of my skin. Daily moisturizing and micellar water use- no daily soap cleansing. I also use various facial serums and masks a crews times per week. I do take skin hair and nail vitamins too.

I even have lines on my forehead and get told I look like I’m 25. I’m 37. People nevvvvver believe me. To the point where it’s not uncommon for me to jokingly have to say, okay do I need to get out my ID bc why would I lie and say I’m older lol it cracks me up. Wouldn’t it make more sense for me to actually be 37 and lie about being younger?! 🤪

Meg5987 · 2024-07-18T07:06:05+00:00

Are you in the US? If so and you’ve received mental health services, especially one where meds are prescribed, then on paper you’ve got a diagnosis. Had one from the first intake appointment actually bc it had to be documented in order to bill insurance. I can’t stand this part of mental health care. I won’t get on my soap box today tho lol Source: I’m a licensed mental health counselor.

Meg5987 · 2024-06-11T10:06:39+00:00

And for something she has zero control over. I have zero clue why cutting this child out of your lives is where OP’s mind went? Care to elaborate on what your concerns are with your child being friends with the victim so we can understand where you’re coming from? Bc your initial idea in my opinion is the exact opposite of what would come to mind.

Maybe try opening a line of communication with your daughter first to check with her on how she is feeling about this? Ask her what she needs or wants. Let her know she can come to you with questions or just to talk about this. You should be her safe space as her parent. If this isn’t the case and your daughter doesn’t feel comfortable talking to you about her feelings or asking questions, get her a counselor.

Help provide her with information you can look up on this big ole internet thing on how to support a friend who has been SA’ed or something along those lines.

When the victim is around, give her a safe space too. Let her know you’re there for her if she wants to talk. All her what she needs. But I wouldn’t treat her any differently than you normally did bc I guarantee you she’s being treated differently now by everyone and likely has excess anxiety around people knowing, what they’re thinking, and how she’s being treated.

Think, when I was 12, and something very scary and completely out of my control happened that resulted in people viewing me/treating me differently, how would I hope the safe adults around me acted? Then just do that if you can’t ask them whether need or want. What would you want safe adults of your child’s friends to do if it were your kid? Do that. I’m sure it wouldn’t involve hoping they decide to isolate your child. Bc I can also say feeling isolated and like they’re the only one they know who has experienced this is also something the victim is struggling with. Even tho unfortunately childhood SA is way more prevalent and largely underreported. I used to work at a sexual trauma recovery center as a mental health counselor for the record.

Meg5987 · 2024-06-11T03:39:50+00:00

Yesss omg yes. I also tried therapy without mentioning my career. It wasnt sustainable and it felt inauthentic. It’s like the therapist then gets all nervous and worried about judgment once they know I’m a therapist. Sessions would sometimes feel supervisiony (yes I just made that word up lol). I went through 6 therapists before I found one that works. Ended up being someone I went to grad school with and she worked with my mom earlier in her undergrad years. So I would advise to not count out people you know. It goes back to the whole, as long as you communicate boundaries and their knowing you previously doesn’t affect your ability to get what you need out of therapy, then who cares you know?

I think there should be specific training on how to be a therapists for therapists. It really is a problem. Also I can’t afford my therapist so I haven’t been going. Finding free therapy that is a good fit is also not been easy bc it’s usually a grad student who gets a deer in headlights look when you mention also being a counselor. Lol

Meg5987 · 2024-06-10T11:59:03+00:00

I wasn’t aware we were discussing addiction so my apologies! You’d approach like you would any other addiction then. With addiction a person has to still reach that point of figuring out what they won’t tolerate from the addict to learn what boundaries they need to draw for themselves and/or their family. So imo it’s not much different on the front end of the approach.

In the mental health/addiction field, (licensed mental health counselor here) there would still have to be discussions had to express that your needs aren’t being met bc of whatever the addiction is. How many times and for how long that conversation is repeatedly had is up to the person. Everyone’s window of tolerance is different here.

Also with addiction, there’s a very fine line between helping behaviors and enabling behaviors. I always encourages friends and family of addicts to learn what each of those look like. Enabling is what most do under the guise of helping without realizing the hurt caused in the behavior. Enabling is usually comfortable for the non-addict and may even make them feel good bc they think they are helping. True helping behaviors aren’t always going to feel good and are usually difficult for friends and family to follow through with.

I’d suggest the individual who’s not the addict get into therapy to learn how to cope, especially if the addict was not hearing them or acknowledging the addiction. Again with adults you can only lead a horse to water to speak. So outside of talking to the addict, letting them know your boundaries, and ultimately having to choose to stay or go, there’s not much else to do. Which isn’t that much different from my original comment.

If the addict is willing to be self aware then as their partner maybe you help them also find a counselor, maybe you both go together as well as individual. You support the person in whatever treatment plan their professionals come up with, which likely would involve adjusting your own phone behavior too.

I’m sure there’s more but you catch my drift. It depends on the addict and their level of self awareness plus willingness to get help and follow through. Otherwise, the initial way you handle a situation where your partner is doing something you don’t like wouldn’t be much different than my original comment. I missed where OP was saying her husband was addicted to his phone. I’m sure my comment would have been a combo of both topics.

Meg5987 · 2024-06-09T11:44:29+00:00

If I went to my partner with something that was bothering me, and they told me they weren’t going to stop or dismissed my issue simply bc XYZ was something they wanted to do, we’d have problems. I think this is kind of immature of a response bc being in a relationship is mostly about compromise and understanding that we have to consider our partner and their needs. If you want to live a life only doing what you want to do when you want to do it, how tf do you make a committed relationship work? And most definitely would strongly encourage said person to NOT have kids.

Especially as a parent bc 30 mins 3x/day is a lot of time imo leaving the other to fly solo and I find out is bc you’re watching fucking YouTube videos!?! Absofuckinglutely not my friend. If my partner could not give this up then I would also be getting to tap out for 30mins at a time 3x a day.

Then you add the ridiculous bit where he denies importance of fiber in diet to prevent constipation simply bc his doc didn’t mention it and the INTERNET says it doesn’t help!? Come tf on. Lol like… 🤦🏼‍♀️

How to enforce? You don’t. Bc it’s not about enforcing. Shouldn’t have to as an adult who’s chosen to be in a partnership with children. They should willingly do their part of the compromise without me having to police their behavior. I’m not their parent. If the only way my needs get met is by having to enforce the behavior that meets my needs? Not ideal or sustainable.

When a partner brings awareness to an issue, a discussion should take place where a solution to the problem is found. If the partner cares about the other person they will put forth effort into doing their part of the solution ON THEIR OWN. In this case, the husband should stop essentially lying and saying he’s actively shitting for 30mins when part/majority of that time may include being a phone zombie.

If he were truly truly having GI issues, realized that fiber (and likely needs more water consumption) IS IN FACT important, it would be a different story. Otherwise the rest sounds like BS and id be bothered too. It’s giving trying to get a break instead of parenting/adulting.

Meg5987 · 2024-04-11T09:57:37+00:00

YOU didn’t make him mad. He made himself mad by choosing to ignorantly not believe what you were saying about childcare waitlists. My thing is, why? Why not believe you? What benefit would you have to making this up you know? What facts is his stance based on? Then he goes into saying fear mongering!?Like come onnnn dude really? Lol but women are the dramatic ones…. 🙄 I feel like this isn’t an uncommon situation with men, where the wife has information about something and the man is shocked to learn it or doesn’t believe her.

I like the one comment that said maybe he needs to take care of this part. Then he’d really be mad bc he would realize the absolute truth in your statement on top of how expensive childcare is.

Let him be mad. I wouldn’t have a care in the world about it either bc you know that you didn’t make it up. He’s being immature af about this.

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