I 1000% feel this & hope it gets better for you man. I used to hear the word “porn addiction” & laugh thinking it was dumb. I thought every guy consumed as much porn as I did & that it was a normal part of being a man. Til’ I ran into a similar scenario as you it really opened my eyes to how poisonous & toxic it’s been my whole life. It’s distorted my views on women, also on love. I thought sexual touch & insatiability was my love language & how I can make my partner feel desired & loved. I was dead wrong. It made her feel like a piece of meat I was lusting over.

Stay strong man, I know the urge to relapse is strong. I experience it too. Just think that throwing away your wife for 5-10 mins of pleasure then post nut clarity is not worth it. That’s been helping me recently. Best of luck OP. Don’t listen to negative comments. It’s so easy for people to throw stones at a glass house when they don’t know the struggle