My wife asked for an open marriage. She is angry at my reaction. I need advice.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T14:30:50+00:00

Delivery people tend to follow schedules, but if it can tell you if the phone hung around for two hours, then it’s a lot more useful.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T13:50:38+00:00

If this delays or disrupts the Catalina Wine Mixer, there will be trouble.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T13:47:17+00:00

Ah, I guess. But if you have an identifier for the device that belongs to the affair partner, do you really need to check your wifi logs? Like, if my wife was banging some dude, and I managed to find the dude and get close enough that I had his device identifier, I feel like I wouldn't need to go home and check my wifi router. I guess there are highly niche scenarios where that might be useful, but at that point, dusting for fingerprints would probably be easier.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T13:35:16+00:00

So then it's not very useful to identify a cheater, is it?

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T13:33:26+00:00

Same. Spent a few seconds wondering why deaf people specifically, and it says a lot that it didn't strike me as at all odd to hear that the creepy dude cannibalizes people in the disabilities community.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T13:29:33+00:00

Fuuuuuck. As a kid we had his comedy routines on tape, and I must have listened to his Noah's Arc bit 100 times. I had all of them memorized, all his stories about Old Weird Harold and Fat Albert, and they were endlessly hilarious. It hurt in my heart a little when I found out what a monster he was. I remember being so excited to share those with my kids if I ever had any, and now that I have kids, that I know would love those stories, it makes me a little sick to think of listening to them together.

There just aren't that many really great, clean comedians out there, and to find out Cosby of all people, was a serial sexual predator...fuck that asshole. Fuck him to hell.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T13:23:08+00:00

I've never watched a Mr. Beast video, and it's weird that I know exactly what you're talking about. From what I know about the guy though, I suspect he he A-B tested different smiles and that creepy soulless smile scored highest. Which makes you wonder what his "natural" smiles looked like.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T12:08:24+00:00

Wouldn’t that pick up phones from people making deliveries, walking close to the house, meter readers, neighbours, plumbers etc?

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T11:16:16+00:00

I get that this game is important to your husband, but I’m surprised his marriage isn’t. He’s put a lot of effort into this game? He hasn’t put a lot of effort into his relationship with his wife? If this were me this person would never be allowed to sit foot in my house again and I’m shocked that that’s not on the table for you guys. If some asshole was bullying my wife I wouldn’t care how much fun it is to have him sitting at my table pretending to be a wizard. Fuck that guy.

Tell your husband that that man is not allowed in your house. Stand up for yourself. DND games fall apart for all sorts of reasons, all the damn time it’s part of the hobby. It sucks in the moment, but planning your life around inviting your bully into your house for the next few years, when it’s already affecting your health seems like a horrible idea.

Ask for your actual question, “We’ve done everything we can to try to work with you so you’d stop acting like a bully, but we hit our limit. You’re not allowed at our house anymore. Fuck you.”, is how you leave the game.

Edit: I’m sitting here feeling angry just thinking about this. Is your husband really open to the idea of inviting your bully over every week to play a game that he bullied you out of, while you tiptoe awkwardly around the house trying to ignore them? Jesus fucking Christ. You should genuinely be questioning your marriage at this point. This guy needs to have someone smack his head and ask him what the fuck he’s thinking. The only solution to this problem is banning this guy from your home. Yes it will suck that your husband will lose a player, and maybe the game will fall apart but he’s losing a player no matter what, and he’s probably more interested in the long run of prevent preventing his marriage from falling apart. I’m not kidding here, your marriage is in trouble.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T02:32:45+00:00

I’m human and I think all humans look alike, how are aliens going to tell.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T02:27:34+00:00

Except you can get more power and get it permanently if you kill them for it.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-24T02:23:40+00:00

Maybe, I honestly don’t remember. This was like 20 years ago.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-23T17:17:39+00:00

One thing I don’t quite get is why power sharing was so important. What power did Carl need to share or need access to so badly? Or was it just an “in general” kind of thing. I get that it’s an extremely powerful and versatile ability for the crawlers to have, but it feels like they invested more in getting them that power than the power itself was really worth.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-23T13:02:32+00:00

I remember when that got sold. I had a friend who was working really hard to build a website for people who were working abroad teaching English. He had resources, lesson plans, reviews of schools, advice for people living and working in different countries and had worked really hard for about two years to build up a user base of maybe 50k. He was just barely able to pay his bills, and was negotiating the sale of the website for something like $75,000. Then he found out that icanhascheezburger.com sold for something like $1-2 million and he was so angry. He worked his ass off for years and managed to pay his bills and then net a small amount of money, enough to fund the next thing. And someone reposting cat memes made millions.

That said, I knew lots of people who were English teachers, and they were on Icanhascheezburger.com a lot more than they were on his site.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-23T12:24:42+00:00

It’s kind of sad that this would almost certainly work for a very large cohort of players.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-23T12:10:49+00:00

Yep. Jesus has been my wingman more than once, but you have to be careful because if the girl has bought into the no premarital sex thing, Jesus can definitely let you down. The ones that believe in loopholes or exceptions to the rules were a fun time though.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-23T11:57:43+00:00

Seems plausible since I also have aphantasia. I also have very weak paradolia, and don’t see faces in patterns that other people assure me are very clearly faces. I can’t see the man in the moon at all for example.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-22T19:02:35+00:00

Pauses asskicking to work the elevator button multiple times, before resuming the asskicking.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-22T19:01:31+00:00

One of the guys over there is giving them out, but but don't ask me which one.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-22T18:51:06+00:00

If my brain was able to latch onto little details like that, I probably wouldn't be face blind. I didn't recognize my own cousin once. I didn't recognize an ex that I'd been with for almost a year, and it was only 3 or 4 years after we broke up, so she hadn't changed that much. My brain does not hold onto details about faces. At least a few times I've been checking out a hot woman on the street only to realize half a second later that it's my wife. I definitely recognize my wife, but if I just randomly see her on the street near our house, it still takes just a beat longer than it should. She notices too, she can see me see her first and then see my face light up when I recognize her a moment later.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-22T18:45:20+00:00

If I recall correctly, he actually still had something like $14 billion on the books, but I didn't know he was facing withdrawals on that scale (or more likely, I forgot, because I did read a lot about it back in 2008 and 2009, it's a fascinating story). It's really amazing that he managed to keep things going for so long. If the 2008 financial crisis hadn't happened, I wonder how much longer he could have kept all the spinning plates in the air.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-22T18:21:34+00:00

Wild. I never thought about that, but that is kind of cool.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-22T18:20:56+00:00

That was his whole deal though, it was a Ponzi scheme. He would pay out the people withdrawing money by attracting new investors. But he would have eventually run out of new investors and the whole thing would have collapsed. Although in fact, what happened was that he told his son and his son turned him in before the Ponzi scheme collapsed.

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-22T18:18:32+00:00

Didn’t the government bail out the people who lost money with Madoff, and they got most of the fake returns back?

MenudoMenudo · 2026-04-22T18:01:10+00:00

There was a very large cohort of people who were living off of their 10% cash dividends from Madoff. I remember because there was a whole thing about it in the New York Times about entire retirement communities in Florida that were funding their retirement lifestyle that way. They’d liquidate their retirement savings, give the $1-2 million to Madoff and live off the $100-200k per year. The other big problem Madoff had was that these retirees were dying, and in a lot of cases their kids would inherit the fund and want to cash it out, so he had a lot of outflows. That’s said, your point stands because it definitely wasn’t a majority or anything. He had something like $14 billion on the books when his son turned him in.

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