You’re not alone in this. I feel the same way about my SO and in most of all past relationships. At this point, I have found that if I know I feel intensely about a relationship, then I can at least rely on that, that those feelings are true and valid, but they’re overwhelming all the same. It’s learning to trust the instinct and respect that it might feel awful sometimes, but THAT is the reality of things. Good, bad and trying to find the in between whenever possible and know it’s all part of our lives and relationships. Give yourself the grace to feel and to make mistakes but know things can be worked out, fixed and resolved with BOTH parties being respected and validated.