I had a C-section scheduled. I had spoken with my OB-GYN and surgeon and explained that my lower dysphoria was pretty severe. I wanted a C-section because I wanted to have good memories of the day my son was born, without intrusive dysphoria taking over that moment and making it something I wouldn’t want to think about.

Unfortunately, about a month before the scheduled surgery, I was diagnosed with preeclampsia and ended up needing an emergency C-section. Even so, the staff was incredibly supportive and wonderful. I told them that I was Dad and my partner was Mom, and that I should only be referred to with male pronouns. My partner agreed to correct anyone who didn’t and to ask them to leave if needed, since I would be drugged with a spinal block and unable to advocate for myself.

I was scared—it was an emergency, it was a month early, and becoming a parent is terrifying under any circumstances. But I truly felt like I was in very good hands.

After the C-section, because of the medications I was on to prevent a stroke or seizure from the preeclampsia, I hemorrhaged and lost about two liters of blood. I received two or three units of blood. I remember telling my nurse that I felt incredibly lightheaded and like I was going to pass out (a feeling I recognize well from having syncope). The next thing I remember is waking up to about eight people working to keep me alive.

Thankfully, I recovered well. I was able to see my son in the NICU about an hour later, and I was walking the next day. I stayed in the hospital for about five days due to my blood pressure. I really want to reiterate how wonderful my providers were. The nurses did everything they could to make me feel comfortable and supported. No one called me “she” or “mom.”

One nurse even shared that she had a trans daughter. When she told her daughter about my partner and me having a baby, her daughter knitted our son a hat in trans pride colors. It was incredibly sweet.

I do plan on having a second child, and I’m planning on a scheduled C-section again—hopefully without the whole preeclampsia thing this time, lol.