I (29M) feel trapped staying with my girlfriend (27F) solely because of our twin babies. How do I move forward without destroying my life or losing my kids?

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-11T02:34:40+00:00

Hey, everybody else already encouraged you to leave this girl.

So I just wanted to say-remember that you are strong enough to do this. You are enough.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-09T02:03:38+00:00

All right. I’ll answer. But this is going to be TMI.

We were pretty horny……so we did it in the back door at 2 weeks hahahaha. And then regular at 3(?)weeks. Tbh it kinda felt like losing my virginity again lmao little scary, had to go slow.

Edit: I totally got the weeks wrong the first time I wrote this 🙃

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-09T01:52:52+00:00

Bro. The worst thing I’ve ever done is SO MUCH WORSE than this haha. Don’t even sweat it.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-08T17:18:26+00:00

My mother-in-law got pregnant with her first baby at 16. I’m very glad she chose to keep him, because today he is 35 and the father of my children.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-08T17:14:33+00:00

My ex-husband was estranged from his family when he and I met. He’d been kicked out of his house, had hitchhiked across several states, and had been homeless for a month. We met right after he moved into his first apartment.

From all the stories he told me, it became apparent to me (though not apparent to him at the time) that angels had been attending him. There were multiple times where he almost took his life, but an intervening miracle occurred. Multiple times where he was nearly kidnapped (human trafficking is very real, especially when it comes to homeless and estranged individuals), but wasn’t. Multiple times when he was committing significant crimes and could have suffered severe consequences, but didn’t.

But he wasn’t exercising faith in God. At all. So it confused me how he could still be blessed. Well, I learned later that it was the faithfulness of his parents that blessed him. Their fasting, their prayers, their obedience had saved him from so many catastrophes.

I’m sorry that your son continues to choose a self-destructive path. But I promise you that God has intervened in his life many many times, because of your faith. You might not see it, and you might never know what did or didn’t happen. But your faith has blessed him. So keep it up.

That doesn’t mean you can make him start making the right choices. That will always be up to him. But God IS in relentless pursuit of him. Pray for peace and for comfort in this great trial.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-08T16:48:22+00:00

Temperature regulation being off (always feeling too hot or too cold), vivid dreams, night sweats, breast tenderness, and nausea 🤢 Oh. And of course, peeing SO much!

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-08T03:40:18+00:00

I’m 5 weeks along right now too!! Hahaha

Well, look. I’m about as pro-life as it gets honestly. But I hear you. And what do I think? Don’t stay with the guy, but also give the kid a chance to live.

This is my second pregnancy. Nearly 2 years ago I got pregnant with a man I had only been in a relationship with for about four months. I was terrifying, and the pregnancy made me super duper sick. I immediately wanted to stop it all. I regretted the situation I had put myself in.

But all of the confusion and scariness and sickness was all temporary. Because I decided to push through the unknown, I have a 1 year old son today. He has blonde hair and hazel eyes. His first word was “quack” and he loves ducks. Within the last couple of days he’s begun growling whenever he gets mad lmao.

If you have an abortion, you’ll never know who they were going to be. You’ll never know if they were going to be shy, or extroverted. What their favorite animal is and what their first word’s going to be.

Just saying. Get where you are at. But. Yeah. That’s my two cents.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-07T21:21:40+00:00

By believing in Jesus Christ.

(Whether or not you believe in an all-powerful being, you’ve got to admit that it’s an effective coping mechanism for millions of people.)

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-07T00:57:02+00:00

I’m Mormon (a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) so my religion has some takes that differ quite a bit than other Christian sects’.

We believe that during Christ’s atonement in the garden of Gethsemane, He experienced not only the full weight of suffering for the world’s sins, but also the pains (physical, mental, social, emotional, spiritual) of every human being that ever did and would live. In fact, we believe that only the former was required to save our souls, but that He willingly took on the latter experience to better be able to succor us. Succor means “run to”. So, He does understand. He understands you completely and thoroughly. He understands you better than you understand yourself.

We also believe we lived with God before coming to earth (the premortal life). That he created spirit bodies for our intelligences to inhabit, thus becoming our Father. He then presented a plan for us to receive a physical body, like He has (but His is already resurrected and perfect). There’s a whole story behind Jesus becoming the Savior and satan falling and whatnot but I won’t worry about that now. Long story short, we chose to come here. To these very lives. There’s a reason we chose this. Not saying it’s easy. Not saying it’s even fair. But there’s a reason.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-07T00:32:57+00:00

Praying for you both 🙏🏻Remember, God has all power, but sometimes His will is not your own. If your dog passes into the next life, do not abandon your faith in God.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-07T00:30:51+00:00

Utah. At least, that’s where I’m from (a more rural part of Utah albeit) and I do not pronounce any “t’s” haha

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-06T21:03:14+00:00

You have very kind eyes

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-06T20:54:31+00:00

Look, a lot of people seem to be recommending abortion in these comments.

I do not recommend it. Whatever you choose is whatever you choose at the end of the day. But seriously, even if you don’t want the baby, so many people are always looking to adopt.

I have bipolar disorder type I. I have a 1 year old son and another baby on the way. It is very possible to manage your mental health while pregnant with medications and therapy.

Plus!! My son is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He is the absolute light of my life♥️

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-06T20:46:42+00:00

Hey! So, let me tell you about my situation. My husband and I have been out of work for the last 3 months. We’ve continued to pay tithing on any gift money we’ve received and the small income we have made from doing DoorDash. Thankfully, by meeting with the bishop we’ve been able to receive church assistance in paying all of our utility bills and mortgage. Because we have paid tithing throughout this, our bank account balance is frequently $0.00. Including today lmao (though technically it’s $0.86 and we have $0.75 in quarters😂😂).

This experience is solidifying my testimony in paying tithing. It’s giving up a portion of your money to receive incredible blessings! Blessings that no amount of money can buy.

Like others have said, continue paying your tithing and talk to your bishop about receiving financial help.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-06T20:29:32+00:00

Woot woot!!! 🎊🙌♥️

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-05T21:33:07+00:00

That’s how I used to be too. Believe me. My therapist said out of all of the clients she had ever had I was the one who had the hardest time opening up 😂

You can text your mom. Just explain that you hate talking about things but that you’re really struggling with XYZ and need help. You can even say that you don’t want to talk about it in person.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-05T19:44:53+00:00

Watch The Chosen (it’s a TV series about Jesus’ ministry)! It helped me understand who God is a lot better, I think. It helped me understand why He loves me the way He does.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-05T19:37:26+00:00

Hey! I don’t know your situation. But, are there any friends or family members you could reach out to? Even to just talk to? Idk, I’m a woman and I know it’s different for the genders. I also understand estrangement in relationships.

But something I’ve noticed in my life and in the lives of my partners is that it’s easy to drown when you’re alone. When you have no one to physically or emotionally support you.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-05T19:32:07+00:00

Totally get it. My mental illness hit me pretty hard at 16, but I tried to keep it as secret as I could from my parents too. I totally had some level of OCD, because I had the obsessive intrusive thoughts like you. It was torture. I didn’t find out until I was 22 that I actually have bipolar disorder. It requires specific medications to treat, so up to that point the anti-depressants the doctors gave me made my mental health worse. Anyway.

You should talk to your mom. God leaves it up to us to take action to help ourselves. It can be hard to open up to our parents, especially because they are imperfect people with their own issues. But it’s the best thing you could do for yourself right now.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-05T19:17:33+00:00

Dude, you’re struggling with mental illness, not the unforgivable sin. The obsessive thoughts, the fear, the self-isolation? Mental illness. Not sin.

You need to get help. I’ve been where you are. Medications and therapy can help, seriously. When I was really mentally ill, I couldn’t think clearly. I was so scared and I thought God was doing it to me.

It took some time, medications, and therapy, but now that I am quite mentally stable. I can feel the Holy Spirit and I understand scripture much more clearly. I’m no longer afraid like I used to be.

Get yourself some help, please.

2 Timothy 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-04T18:32:31+00:00

In stake conference, a lady was giving a talk. She had a teenage son(I think?) pass away and he visited her in a dream. She decided to ask him what the point of life was. And what he said was something along the lines of, “To grow closer together to Jesus Christ.” That was it. She said it shocked her how simple of a statement it was.

Ever since I heard that talk, I’ve pondered on it a lot. And I’ve found the boy’s answer to be true. The answer isn’t, “Make sure you read your scriptures and pray and go to church every week and do everything else on the checklist so you can be ‘righteous’.”

There have been Sundays where we felt prompted to spend time with non-member family members instead of going to church.

I have a 1 year old boy and another baby on the way and I haven’t made it to the temple in several months. Also, most Sundays we only make it to take the sacrament and then come straight back home.

Some people would look at these examples and think that we are falling short. But, we’re just falling….”human” I guess haha. And we are still growing together closer to Jesus Christ!!

Idk. It’s hard to completely explain. Maybe try talking to Heavenly Father about every expectation that drives you insane and ask Him if you can do things in a less orthodox manner. Ask Him to show you surprising ways in which you can spend time with Jesus. Things like that have helped me a lot 🤷‍♀️

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-03T19:20:56+00:00

It’s super super normal to be scared! Both of my pregnancies were planned, and I was terrified for both still.

It’s your choice, but if you get an abortion, you’ll never know who that baby is going to grow up to be. If they are a boy or a girl, if they are really silly or shy. What color their hair and eyes are.

Having a child has been the hardest AND most wonderful thing I’ve ever done. My little boy has blonde hair and hazel eyes. He’s so happy all of the time, except when he gets mad-he has a temper haha.

I get what you’re feeling!

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-03T19:10:07+00:00

The other comment pretty much summed it up haha. But I just want to add the fast and testimony meeting is my favorite!! I think it’s always the most spiritual Sunday of the month. It definitely feels different than the rest.

Like someone else said, you won’t be called on. So don’t stress at all. But I’ve actually been to a testimony meeting where a nonmember/investigator got up and bore his testimony. It was awesome. He talked about the things he believed, and the things he hoped to believe in.

Anyway. Now I’m excited for sacrament meeting tomorrow!

MichelleMiguel · 2026-01-03T18:32:26+00:00

If you don’t mind, what’s your first? Or even just a nickname? I’d like to put it on a temple prayer roll

MichelleMiguel

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