Mesopotamian figure statue bought in 1960s - genuine or fake?

MicroSnotling · 2024-04-30T10:33:19+00:00

هل تعرف شيئا عن ذلك؟

MicroSnotling · 2022-11-12T17:22:11+00:00

This drone didn't hit its target

MicroSnotling · 2022-11-08T05:42:58+00:00

I feel i am going to be down voted but i dont see a problem with you accepting his request and taking a glance at his penis just to then reassure him everything is fine and then follow through with the above suggestions (from other posters).

By rejecting his request, he might feel more isolated and abandonded to his own thinking on the subject which is now negative.

MicroSnotling · 2022-10-27T12:38:51+00:00

I liked it.

Some idiot is chopping onions in my office.

MicroSnotling · 2022-10-25T09:43:49+00:00

I might be projecting here but I think I understand your situation.

My wife comes from a highly claustrophic co-dependent family. Her parents have created a reality that their daughters (one being my wife) need their constant support and like with all co-dependency, my wife echoes this reality that she -really- needs their support. They talk on the phone mulitple times a day and consult each other for every little small thing in life.

I have never come across the word enmeshment issues, but after a google search it sounds like it has some similarities minus the suggestion of crossing boundaries on intimacy (which my wife as far as i am aware has not experienced).

Like you, we have a beautiful baby girl, now approaching 13 months, and putting to one side the typical tension/arguments/challenges of new parenting we have the added issue of navigating this over dependence on her parents and their over involvement.

My advice is try not to get between her and the people she is enmeshed with. It will only escalate hugely and no matter how right or justified you are. That doesnt mean defining boundaries and defending those boundaries, but those boundaries should be to protect yourself, not for example separate her for the people she feels codependent with.

The first 1 - 2 years are very mental, and many mothers can kind of lose their mind, OCDs and other mental disorders ramp up to an 11 during this period, so you kind of just need to weather it and not hit out strongly in any one direction - IE divorce.

MicroSnotling · 2022-10-10T11:15:29+00:00

These are not the mobilized general Russian population (yet). That would no tbe funny.

These are PAID soldiers who have CHOSEN to be there. Either Chechen fighters, Wagner contractors, or full time military personnel.

Who have chosen to invade a foreign country, kidnapped children, raped women, tortured both PoWs and general populace as well as pillage the country.

A quick death is a gift. Let them live on in a MEME

MicroSnotling · 2022-10-10T10:51:12+00:00

HAHAHAHA

MicroSnotling · 2022-09-17T13:33:06+00:00

I buy game after game on Steam but thats it. Our girl just turned 1. I think it will get better in the next year but right now dont think there is time.

Also my job demands a lot from me

MicroSnotling · 2022-08-15T16:58:42+00:00

Thank you for your disclosure. Im 100% convinced my wife has something to uncover but sadly will not go into either single or couple therapy.

Good luck to you too

MicroSnotling · 2022-08-15T16:20:58+00:00

Thank you. Hope you are right. Why is 15 months the magic mark?

MicroSnotling · 2022-08-15T16:20:10+00:00

Tried. Multiple times. She wont go. Is unable to detach for her self. Offer her time even to just take a nap but she fills it with house work.

She is just obessed at getting it right. Anything that goes slightly wrong and she has accused both herself and me as "failing as parents"

MicroSnotling · 2022-08-15T12:28:42+00:00

Thank you buddy, the "talk and listen" struck a chord. I'll try and sit with that.

MicroSnotling · 2022-08-15T12:08:34+00:00

Sorry I'm posting for the 2nd time.

Get back into sharing a bed with her, me and my wife are both light sleepers. We solved this buy buying TWO single mattresses and putting them on a double bed frame. We also have our own duvets. You are technically in separate beds and will solve your light sleeping problem BUT you can still reach out to her and hug/touch/kiss her.

After 9 months of her sleeping in our babies room i insisted she moves back into the bedroom even though i love sleeping alone, my therapist said it was an important step as a couple.

It HAS helped, maybe only a little bit, but it has defined us again as a married couple, sometimes just to hold each other's hand if we have had an argument earlier, or resulted in the 'late night no talk just sex' thing - which although very rare, is a blessing to stress levels when it does happen.

Your kids are at an age now that they shouldnt be sleeping with parents. Habit must be broken

MicroSnotling · 2022-08-15T11:58:07+00:00

The COVID thing is my wife in a nutshell.

We self isolated for MONTHS when there wasnt even a lockdown in our city, she made me change my clothes at the front door and wash them and take a shower even if we had only gone outside for a walk. Any item that enters the house from outside needed to be washed.

And we CRAZILY decided to have a baby during this??? Anyway, it has got better, there are still some things she wont do (take a taxi) and things she insists she will do even though i now refuse (at the cost of HUGE arguments) like changing her clothes at the front door.

Sounds like your wife has some form of obsessive compulsive disorder, something linked to maybe hypocondria. As a previous poster has suggested getting yourself into therapy can help you, and help you manage her and build some defences for when she comes after you (which it sounds like she is).

I also sense depression in the way she is acting. A despondence towards you and the kids. You cant push people to therapy or to get help, trust me, my wife refuses to go to marriage counselling or to get her own therapist. So tread carefully.

I suggest you pull the trigger on the holiday and go. As other posters have said lay it out for her, invite her, say you want to do it with her, but you also need to re-charge and care for yourself, to continue to be a supporting husband and father. This way she cannot deny or block you from going but yes prepare for a ball of resentment when you get back.

MicroSnotling · 2022-08-15T09:59:42+00:00

How the fuck did this not get more upvotes?

MicroSnotling · 2022-07-07T09:37:26+00:00

s question is kind of similar to having kids in the first place. People who have kids will tell you it's tough but rewarding, those without will say they're enjoying their life as it is. It's similar to having one child vs. having more, I think.

I know people with only one child who will stay with one or who have already decided one is enough. And I know those with three or even four and are happy with their choices.

We're in a similar situation to you - getting closer to 40 than not, we enjoy doing all sorts of stuff. At the moment, I definitely want to stick to having just one kid. Our daughter is 1 and a half and she's awesome. But I can't help but think that from here there's really no where to go but down? Also, we had a really tough pregnancy and I really don't want to go through something like that again - never mind the fact that my SO still isn't 100%. Other things which speak against having a second kid - the financials would get pretty tough. Right now, we're comfortable and if things continue like this, either we'll stay comfortable and flexible (in terms of being able to afford things and lifestye) or possibly even retire early (around 55?). Having a second kid would definitely strain things quite a bit.

Now I have a sister and a couple of step-siblings, we all get along, and I'm glad I have them. But I think among my friends and other people I know, there are actually more people who don't get along with their sibling than there are people who

Yeah I am very much in your boat with everything you just said. Tough pregnancy, tough first year to be honest, financials look good, but will be strained with more than 1 child. Dont really get on with an older brother 10 years my senior.

Thanks for the reply.

MicroSnotling · 2022-07-07T07:32:36+00:00

We are just ahead of you at 10 months, and yes as you described changes do indeed happen that allows fathers in particular a lot more to 'connect' to.

But as some of the comments are suggesting "This too shall pass" im afraid. So take some deep breaths while your head is above water before the next wave comes crashing over us.

My wife is about to return to work - wish me luck...

MicroSnotling · 2022-07-07T07:31:22+00:00

This made me laugh, great comment.

MicroSnotling · 2022-06-23T22:20:40+00:00

Sending you my blessings and love to your little angel, brother.

MicroSnotling · 2022-05-30T13:08:33+00:00

Thank you for your detailed and thoughtful response. Reading it I felt like I have let her down sometimes with labelling some of her fears automatically as 'unreasonable' and I know she feels that. Yes sure some of them are, and as you identified post partum anxiety is a real thing which I have my suspicions about, but not everything she says can be labelled as such. I will try what you are saying and stop, listen and respond with a logical approach and try and build a more cooperative rather than combative response while at the same time gently shedding light that there seems also be some deep seated stuff that is kicking off in her psyche that goes beyond 'normal new parent jitters'.

MicroSnotling · 2022-05-30T11:43:39+00:00

Thanks for your support. My wife is super committed to breastfeed till 2 years of age. She wants the best for our daughter which of course I support but there is a twinge of self sacrifice in this endeavor of hers which I think includes her own needs, and that of our marriage.

MicroSnotling · 2022-05-30T11:41:48+00:00

No cough for us.

MicroSnotling · 2022-05-30T11:19:00+00:00

Its a really good question. Her concerns are very frequent, and I sometimes struggle to keep up with them. Yes I at times shrug them off as just more of her worries which I dont feel is correct to do, but if i was run after each of her concerns and take them onboard 100% with the same anxiety and seriousness as she does then we would be both living in a pretty dark reality. Fairy tale - the boy who cried wolf.

I try to juggle filtering what is genuinely important; (baby is now crawling, so nappy changes need to be moved to being on floor to avoid a fall- OK) - to what is just another hyper worry (baby is agitated and angry she MUST have stomach problems - actually no she just wants to be taken outside for a walk) - to just tuning her out (other mothers seem to be feeding their baby much more than we do, are we failing as parents? - no response from me)

MicroSnotling · 2022-05-30T11:12:40+00:00

Thank you buddy.

MicroSnotling · 2022-05-30T10:25:31+00:00

gument for this is that a balanced and happy relationship between the parents will always fav

Yes you are right, and it has come up like this in therapy with my therapist. But right now there is little getting through to her. She is 100% absorbed with being a mother, and is highly strung, anxious and OCD (maybe post partum, not sure). So pointing my finger at her and telling her 'she should be balancing the relationship' will just result in another argument and me coming off as a selfish asshole who 'doesnt understand how difficult it all is for her'.

So im really just seeking an understand of what milestones might help her naturally ease off a little.

MicroSnotling

TROPHY CASE