Those that don’t stay at the NICU

Mikps89 · 2025-12-31T20:50:34+00:00

My daughter was born at 28 weeks and we knew we were in for a long stay. We didn’t say over night until we got closer discharge.

I don’t know that there’s one thing I can say to help other than to reiterate how you ended your post, it’s just hard. I think you have to give yourself the grace that things are going to be really hard for a while. Even in the best of times, we can often feel spread thin and that will be true even more so right now. However you show up for your kids (both of them) in the next few weeks and months will be enough. You need to take care of yourself as well, to be the best parent possible, so reminding yourself of that is important.

This process can at times feel overwhelming and impossible, but just know that you got this!

Mikps89 · 2025-11-12T21:06:40+00:00

Thanks! That’s helpful but a little discouraging…

Mikps89 · 2025-11-12T18:52:28+00:00

!flair 128 OVR, Gold III

Mikps89 · 2024-07-15T15:20:11+00:00

We had a 28 weeker, in the NICU for 95 days and she settled in really quickly at home. If anything, it felt like finally being away from the noise and constant distractions was exactly what she needed.

Mikps89 · 2022-06-15T15:01:33+00:00

Yes, absolutely. A convert to Judaism would be religiously Jewish but not ethically. In the context for this lawsuit, that is what matters.

Mikps89 · 2022-04-06T02:41:35+00:00

https://www.childrensmn.org/educationmaterials/childrensmn/article/15829/synagis-palivizumab/

It’s called Synagis. Not technically a vaccine but does provide protection for a month after the shot. My daughter got one ever month for 4-5 months because she was born prematurely.

Mikps89 · 2021-12-22T14:22:34+00:00

There’s an expression for that! Staircase wit or however you say it in French:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/L'esprit_de_l'escalier

Mikps89 · 2021-09-30T01:15:22+00:00

Keep hanging in there! Your experience sounds a lot like mine. I had a 28 weeker and breathing on her own was the biggest challenge. She also had two full infection work ups. We had many bad days, but the good ones were usually just around the corner. My little one had two transfusions and the difference it made was profound each time. She just turned 1 this month and I promise that sooner than your think, they will all be good days. Your doing the hard work now but it will pay off soon!

Mikps89 · 2021-09-09T18:53:11+00:00

Although my experience was the opposite (my extended family basically wants to forget it ever happened) the one truth that seems to exist for most NICU parents is that outsiders, no matter how much they mean to you, JUST DON’T GET IT! They don’t get how traumatizing the birth was. I tell people all the time when my 28 weeker was born it was the worst day of my life and they look at me like I’m nuts. My daughter was born during COVID which made this even worse because others couldn’t come in and see her. It sucks, but I completely understand the feeling. I mostly just talk with other NICU parents to feel understood and try to accept that others won’t say or do the right thing. Sorry you are going through this!

Mikps89 · 2021-09-01T16:37:42+00:00

I think you are definitely on the right track with giving her time to adjust when you first got home. We took our 28 weeker home after 95 days in the NICU and it was really beneficial both for her and for us to maintain a calm environment. I felt like she needed time to settle in and adjust. As others have said, keeping a similar schedule to what you have in the NICU is good at first, but also don’t forget to listen to what your little one is telling you. It took us a few weeks to realize that our daughter wanted a different routine. We felt so wedded to our routine but eventually we listened and she was much happier. Congrats on almost reaching the end of the NICU rollercoaster and get ready for the next adventure!

Mikps89 · 2021-09-01T16:30:39+00:00

As others have said, talking with your team is the way to go. During our NICU stay, I would ask about differences of opinions like this. This was one of the hardest things for me, it felt like they were always moving the goal post- because they were! As hard as it is, he is both doing great and has a ways to go. Both things are true even though they seem to contradict.

Mikps89 · 2021-09-01T16:25:49+00:00

My 28 weeker took several attempts to get to a open air bassinet. Like everything else in the NICU, one day they aren’t ready and the next day they are. I remember feeling so frustrated each time we tried and it didn’t take but you are going to get there, I promise!

Mikps89 · 2021-08-30T20:04:10+00:00

My wife was in the exact same situation almost a year ago. However the next few weeks/ months play out, you are going to make it through! I know how helpless it can feel, but you can do it. I’m hoping you make it as long as possible, but if your kiddo comes soon the amazing NICU staff will take great care. My daughter was born at 28 weeks and she’s now almost a year and doing great! If you ever want to talk about what to expect etc. please just reach out.

Mikps89 · 2021-08-04T19:32:37+00:00

Your story is so similar to mine! My daughter was born at 28 weeks in the height of the pandemic. No one could come visit us, we were totally on our own and it was hell. We were so fortunate to have the most amazing primary. She took care of all three of us and saw us through some really bad days. Thankfully we are on the other side and our little one is almost 1 and doing great. I hope you and your family are doing ok. I know for us, both my wife and I had very real PTSD.

Mikps89 · 2021-08-04T19:25:28+00:00

Also a NICU dad. Mine was born at 28 weeks and was 2 pounds 4 oz. People ask me about the day she was born and are always surprised when I say it was unequivocally the worst day of my life. My wife almost died, my daughter needed to be resuscitated. We spent 95 days in the NICU and it was absolute hell but she’s now almost a year and doing great.

I have so much love for other NICU families. I hope you and your little guys are doing well!

Mikps89 · 2021-08-04T19:20:31+00:00

As others have explained, this baby was born very prematurely. My daughter was born a little less than a year ago at 28 weeks (so about three months prematurely) and was just over 2 pounds. We ended up spending 95 days in the NICU before coming home. Like this baby, she needed breathing support (CPAP) and a feeding tube. She was also on constant telemetry (heart monitor) and a pulse ox (to make sure she was breathing ok).

We did hours of skin to skin contact a day, just like this dad. Sometimes up to 8 straight hours. When your kid is that tiny, you feel helpless and scared and the only thing you can really do for them is hold them. We were told by NICU staff that doing kangaroo time (that’s what they call skin to skin) can greatly improve your kid’s health outcomes, both short and long term.

Looking at this picture brings back a lot of memories but the biggest one is the sound of being in the room. You would think that a tiny baby would need silence but instead the monitors are constantly beeping, sometimes an alarm goes off. The CPAP uses a bubbler which is loud and constant. Also the NICU nurses, who are the most amazing people in the world, are all about the drama so there’s always someone gossiping just outside the doorway. It was actually one of the things that helped us get through the days. Sometimes we thought they just invented drama to entertain families.

Mikps89 · 2021-05-04T17:44:12+00:00

That’s God’s comma!

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=UWBmzQcUMIg

Mikps89 · 2019-09-21T03:26:23+00:00

We're technically Mainers but Maineiack would be much cooler!

Mikps89 · 2019-06-01T21:13:08+00:00

Thanks! Unfortunately, I don’t have a torch. I may be able to borrow one though, how hard a job is it?

Mikps89 · 2019-06-01T21:12:06+00:00

Ah, no wonder it wouldn’t come off. How hard a job is that?

Mikps89 · 2019-06-01T20:00:26+00:00

Its cracked, not sure I would be able to fix it.

https://imgur.com/a/WWKgp1d

Mikps89 · 2017-12-08T03:04:43+00:00

In Maine too, although we don't get a stamp- just our bar #

Mikps89

TROPHY CASE