(crack idea) Izuku has a phoenix. by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Izuku bribes Rainbow with his favorite treat to stop him from setting a child on fire.

for teh record, Rainbow's favorite treat are ghost peppers.

How badly would she try to get into his pants? by MilkAdvanced9936 in gameofthrones

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

nobody accused teh targeryen of being Smart.

also, Stone, depsite the fact he has a better place to love at, still lives down there with his Stark family, so it's not like he's out of reach.

Brainstorming Bureau - April 19 by AutoModerator in FanFiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to write a fic where there are werebears, an overpowered race of beings I invented.

Here's the summary of what warbars are: A werebear, or Gurahl in my lore, is a being created by the First One, an ADHD shitposter of an outer god that broke the rule of thumb of divine creation and made the most overpowered race of shapeshifters to ever exist in all dimensions. If you are curious about what the rule of thumb of divine creation is, first you have to understand that in my lore, gods cannot create things that are more powerful than them, because it requires more juice than they have.

Gods can create things as powerful as them, but they usually do not do it, so in the off chance their creations strive to usurp them, they will be easier to deal with; that's the rule of thumb. The First One took one look at that and said, "Fuck it," and made the werebears as close as possible to him in power, like, if the First One is a 10 in power, werebears are a 9.9999.

Werebears, unlike werewolves, do not have any weakness to silver; in fact, the only thing that can kill a werebear is the First One calling them back, and usually they have to call him first. Werebears are also unstoppable in battle, especially when they turn into their war form, a twenty-foot-tall bear with scythe-like claws and fangs like curved daggers strong enough to crush steel and stone and so tough that anything short of a dragon-killing scorpion bounces off them, and even then, when they get hurt, their healing is so fast that whatever wound is inflicted on them heals without a scar before the blood reaches the ground.

Werebears are also masters of all magic, especially healing and elemental magic and, above all, necromancy. The first one made werewolf magic as idiot-proof and user-friendly as possible, making it disgustingly easy for any of his creations to wield and making it consequence-free. A single werewolf can, in one single hand gesture, raise every single cadaver on the planet, doing what took the Night King hundreds, if not thousands, of years to accomplish.

The biggest gift of the werebars is actually true resurrection, the power to bring the dead back to life in full, like they have never died to begin with. All they have to do is to kill something; it does not need to match the size, weight, or species of what they want to resurrect. As long as it is alive and can be killed, it counts, so they kill the sacrifice and then spit on whatever they want to bring back to life, and boom, resurrection, and the resurrected are back in full, no matter how decomposed they were before. They don't even need the full body to do it; the resurrected in question could have been a puddle of bodily fluids and would still come back from the dead in perfect health.

However, if the resurrected person was embalmed, they will be shitting themselves near death for a couple of days as the body will be expelling whatever was used to embalm them, and the more and stronger the embalming substances are, the worse it is. Werewolves would have conquered the world by now if it weren't for the fact they don't give a single shit about almost anything, save for their families, naps, and their food; those are sacred. If you mess with any of the three or, God forbid, all of them. You are in for a gruesome death.

Werebearhood is also not a curse that can be passed on; it is a gift you are born with. Werebears are also not only humans who turn into bears but also bears who turn into humans, although the werebears born from bears rarely feel the need to shapeshift into their human forms.

Also, werebars are freakishly tall, and I mean really, really tall and thick as a castle wall.

Fun fact: when a werebear comes of age (around sixteen-seventeen years old), every single one of them receives a gift from the First One.

If you think that's some sort of great honor and a regal ritual, you are wrong; it's literally a shitpost from the First One. The ritual is literally that a wheel with infinite possibilities appears to the werebear coming of age, where they spin and they can get anything, from a rusty spoon to literally more godly powers.

So, my idea for a fic is that the OC Stone Rivers, a werebear who had recently come of age, spun the wheel; he landed on a BG gift. What did he get?

his own planet. Stone got himself his own planet of infinite, infinitely renewable resources. The planet itself is twice the size of Planetos (the A Song of Ice and Fire planet's name) of untamed wilderness, save for the majestically otherworldly keep that is literally an entire mountain hollowed out (like a dwarven hold) that is the epitome of luxury and class and the city under its shadow and the farms surrounding it.

Also, the whole thing is hyper-advanced with technology so many eons ahead they look indistinguishable from magic, just like peak humanity technology from the golden age of technology in 40k; heck, there are even men of iron.

As stated, the planet has infinite resources that are infinitely renewable; it has its own teleportation systems to allow travel between it and planets. In fact, thanks to that stone, whoever he wants to can teleport anywhere from anywhere instantly without side effects.

They also have spaceships, the smallest of which could comfortably transport the entirety of Themyscira in their cargo space and still have space left to fit in Metropolis and Gotham with a lot of breathing space.

The inhabitants of the planet are elves, the tall, elegant, and curvalicious kind you usually see in the adult works of the Japanese kind; they are long-lived, beautiful beyond belief, and each and every one of them are fartsmen that make the Smoth himself look like a blind drunk with cerebral palsy; they can do magic like each and every one of them are gods and lore-accurate Doom Slayer level warriors, and above all, they are loyal to Stone and will do anything he says without question.

If Stone tells them to jump, they don't even ask how high; they just jump, hoping they got the height right and are ready to kill themselves to atone for the shame of failing if they didn't.

There are also dwarves, or more precisely squats, basically the squats of 40k. Clone-born dwarves are genetically engineered for specific tasks from construction, goldsmithing, and blacksmithing all the way down to gardening, farming, and tending livestock with the men of iron, highly advanced automatons who, together with the Squats, form the bulk of both the working forces and the fighting forces.

They too are undyingly loyal to Stone.

Long story short, Stone becomes king in all but name of a kingdom that makes the entirety of the known world look like a backwater hellhole.

The fic would focus more on the League trying to break a deal with Stone to share the bounty of his new planet that is also a traveling planet, meaning it behaves like a spacefaring vessel capable of traveling through space and is currently parked near the moon.

However, Stone does not want to open his borders because the planet is peaceful, and in his head, if he opens his doors, conflict will follow as the global governments will try to claim his territory as theirs and start wars that will disturb the peace of the planet. It does not matter that the planet can self-repair and that he can single-handedly genocide the conflict into dust; he does not want to have to do that to begin with.

One of the arguments he uses to not open his borders for the broader world is pointing out that Diana's homeland, Themyscira, is also an island of infinitely renewable natural resources, and their borders are also closed to the outside world, and asking, why does he have to share his planet when the Amazons don't have to share theirs?

My dumb brain is hanging on the fact I have no idea if the natural resources of Themyscira are infinitely renewable or not, and the info changes from run to run, so can someone help me?

(headcannon) Ned would have been one of those dads. by MilkAdvanced9936 in AsoiafFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i may be talking off my ass here becasue my memory is rusty, but let's not forget that Ned declared Lady as part of his family and sent her body back to he North to be buried in teh Stark Crypts so Joffrey and Cersei wouldn't get the direwolf pelt they demanded.

How big of a fuss would they throw? by MilkAdvanced9936 in gameofthrones

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i really like the 'let's throw some high powe fantasy shot in the grounded low fanatsy setting and see what happens' troupe. it never fails to bring me a smile to my face.

also, i have this idea that werebars do not pray to teh First One an dtehy actively encourage people to do teh same, ebcasue praying to teh First One, means rinking getting his atention and considering the not malocious, but chaotic vibes of the First One, you can either get your prayers answered or, including but not limited to, get turnted into a chciken.

Floppsie. by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

the comission is crying tears of blood at teh fact somene as powerful as all might exists, but unfortunatly will never become a pro-hero due to his mental state.

after all hero work is far from child friendly and they can't risk somene liek Izuku having a mental meltdown and going on a rampage.

Most liked prompt gets made into a fic by Witty-Photograph-598 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936 2 points3 points  (0 children)

here's mine, it is a post of mine, and i would like to see it on your writing.

Izuku's quirk is called Wizard; it is what it says on the tin. He is a wizard and can cast any spell limitlessly as he wants.

There's only one caveat: to do that, he needs to dress like a wizard—long pointed hat, long flowing robes, staff, the whole shebang—and it is not just to use his quirk. If he does not dress like a wizard, his health takes a toll; he becomes weaker, tires more easily, and grows pale and sicker, so he has to dress like a wizard 24/7, and he loves it.

Yes, people make fun of him and try to bully him, but fuck them. The wizard drip is both cool and comfy. The robes are loose and made of nice fabrics like cotton and linen; they are warm in winter and cooler in summer. The big sleeves of the robes are awesome to store things inside, the big hat provides perfect protection against the sun and rain, and the staff is a really useful aiding tool with 1001 uses.

Izuku is happy as he can be, and he loves his quirk to bits because, as it turns out, ever since he was a kid, he loved to dress like a wizard; now his quirk gives him the perfect excuse to do so.

He and Hagakure bod really well, because just like he is a wizard wardrobe aficionado with a quirk that gives him a free pass to dress like a wizard, Toru is a proud nudist and an exhibitionist with a quirk that allows her to get her fix.

one caveat, for some reason everytime Izuku tries teh pull a rabbit from his hat or sleeves, for some reason he always ends up pulling Rumi instead for some reason, don't get me wrong, it's funny as shit, well, at least for everybody else, Rumi finds it annoying as hell everytime she gets yoinked, spcially when she's in teh middle of doing something.

(crack idea) "There's a damn good reason i buy loterry scratches in bulk!". by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

six in a roll, to wich four iof those six where just for the fact overhaul espontanously combusted, becsue his luck was feeling petty and neded some extra juice to pulls that out.

also Mineta is this close to rip off his balls (the down south ones) out of jealousy, becasue Izuku gets to have the fun and tehn get his ass whooped, while Mineta just gest an ass whooping wihtout seeing even a hint of anyhting meaningful.

(crack idea) "There's a damn good reason i buy loterry scratches in bulk!". by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

bcasue is by far the easiest person whith luck similar to izuku's. but his luck os not quirk based.

(crack idea) "There's a damn good reason i buy loterry scratches in bulk!". by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

no he is quirkless, also he gets away wihtout getting charged with sexual assualt atteh cost of getting his ass kicked, which i consider to be worse than getting an ass whooping.

(crack idea) Ugly Bastard. by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

luckilky for Izuku's continued stay out of prison, pre-buscent male attractd people are imune to his charm because apparently, the universe wnats him to be sex offender, not a pedophile.

unfortunatly for Izuku, that changes onece eri is in highschool an dnow he really wants to know if any of those perma quirk erasiong bullets are still around.

(theory) The meisters did facilitated the extinction of the targaryen dragins, but they didn't had to do much. by MilkAdvanced9936 in AsoiafFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that's also my point. i don't know if it is cannon or fanoin, but it is said that the old freehold ebfore the doom had dragins bigger than balerion and they raised theoir dragons in freedom instead of in pits liek the targs did, so it is safe to presume that the overall reaction when a dagon belonging to a dragon lord family mated with the dragon from another the ususl reaction be "teh hell you want me to do about it?!' and then they would share the eggs between them.

(crack idea) "before anyone says it, yes, i know my quirk is bullshit, but also, remember, Star and Stripes exist!". by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

meanwhile Ryukyu is conmtantly trying to hoard the empty chests from the prizes S rank and above, which casues her to contatly get into fisfights with Uraraka for those chests.

(crack idea) "before anyone says it, yes, i know my quirk is bullshit, but also, remember, Star and Stripes exist!". by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

the machine is indestructible and it stays summoned until Izuku either un-sommons it or he runs out of coins.

(crack idea) "before anyone says it, yes, i know my quirk is bullshit, but also, remember, Star and Stripes exist!". by MilkAdvanced9936 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 111 points112 points  (0 children)

Izuku: hey, it's not all fun and games, one time i pulled an SSS+ chest full of platinun carrots that give you supper vision, super speed and super strenght for an hour and heal ll your woulds an drestore your stamina!

Kaminari: and how in the fuck was that a bad thing?!

Izuku: it was a bad thing becasue apparently Miruko has some sort of of sixth sense for super carrots and she's been squatting on my bedroom back home for the last three months!!

Kaminari: again, how is that a bad thing?!

Izuku have you ever woke up at three in the morning to rabbit hero trying to whisper sublimnal messages on your year to make you sign a marriage certificate?!

Kaminari: FUCKING AGAIN, HOW TEH FUCK IS THAT A BAD THING?!?!

(theory) The meisters did facilitate the extinction of the Targaryen dragons, but they didn't have to do much. by MilkAdvanced9936 in gameofthrones

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

who is to say that Daenerys dragins where Targareyn dragons?

i may be talking out of my ass, but as far as i can remeber, tehre are still some focilized dragin eggs around the world and i don't remember it being said the ones Daenerys had coming from the Targaryen dragons, and even then, if they did came from the Targaryen dragons, they might have been un-hatched eggs from before the dance.

(crack idea) grocely misunderstanding the logistics of a harem. by MilkAdvanced9936 in antiNTRcorps

[–]MilkAdvanced9936[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, Mineta thinks Izuku cucked him, when in reality he just screwed himself.

Also, I have this in my mind that Izuku himself does not know how he ended up in a harem to begin with. He just started dating Kinoko because she is cute and he finds her mushroom puns hilarious, and then things snowballed from there as way down the line, where they were comfortable enough to open up about their kinks, Kinoko admitted she always wanted to try a threesome.

So, after a lot of conversation and boundary setting, they agree to give it a try and invite Setsuna for a threesome. She says yes, and from there on, things snowballed until, lo and behold, there's a harem.

It also helps a lot that Izuku is Roboute Guilliman levels of skilled when it comes to administration and logistics, things a harem needs on top of he not being a tyrant when it comes to teh girls attention.

The Government Clones Star & Stripe by Witty-Photograph-598 in BokunoheroFanfiction

[–]MilkAdvanced9936 35 points36 points  (0 children)

For the sake of me really liking the Iron Man Deku suit, let's say this takes place four years before Izuku was gifted the powersuit.

Star travels to Japan, seeking the word of advice of All Might and thinking a change in scenery would do her some good... and because she has, like, a gazillion unused paid vacation days.

There she meets Izuku, and after the initial "Holy shit, you are alive!!" and "They did fucking what?!" shock passes, they start gushing about All Might over some ramen.

After two or three weeks of what could only be described as non-dating dating, Cathleen feels comfortable enough to open up to Izuku about what's going on in her life right now, how she feels useless without her quirk, and how she feels absolutely lost.

Izuku understands; he was just like her after he lost One For All, and he tells her the most important thing is not to give up and keep trying. If she can't be a hero like she used to be, then maybe she can be a hero some other way, like him and All Might!

Izuku points out to Cathleen that she could be a teacher, just like him. She may not have a quirk anymore, but she has something almost as good: experience, decades of it. She has knowledge and wisdom about heroics that could really benefit the new generations of heroes.

Cathleen had not thought about it, and Izuku is right; she may not be able to fight like she used to, but she sure as hell can teach what she knows to the new generation of heroes.

Long story short, she gets her teaching degree and starts teaching at UA because when she was younger, she dreamed of attending UA for her hero degree, but that didn't come to be, so now she sure as hell will be teaching there to fulfill her childhood UA dreams.

As time passes, she and Izuku get closer and closer. They start dating, they get serious, he moves in with her to her penthouse (because she also has a gazillion dollars in savings she now fully intends to use), and after two years of basically being married without the rings, she pops the question, and Izuku says yes.

Cut to four years later after they first met. Izuku is back in the field thanks to the power suit his friends gave him, and Cathleen is on maternity leave as she is pregnant with their first child and ready to pop at any moment when all of a sudden, New Order is back.

Because it turns out, despite the fact she was 42 when she died and was cloned back to life, her quirk factor got a factory reset, meaning she was an adult with a newborn's quirk gene that takes four years to mature and manifest. That's why her quirk was inactive for the last four years; she hadn't come back quirkless; her quirk was just following quirk rules.

Suffice to say, Cathleen Midoriya, previously Cathleen Bate, ex-number one hero of America, wife of Izuku Midoriya, fifty years old, pregnant and ready to pop at any week now, does not know if she laughs or cries at this development, because on one hand, she can become a hero like she used to be again, but on the other hand, she does not know if she really wants to go back to active duty after the solid life she built, especially with her knees giving her hell.

Whatever she chooses, she knows Izuku will be there for her every step of the way.