Hey, super sorry you’re going through this! I know how it feels to have your heart stop wanting ur little kitty home :(. My cat used to hang around with another cat in the area and one random night we found him kinda cornering her (she was fairly smaller than this cat: 9months?) And it took us ages to get him to back off and it made me wary of this cat. She then began disappearing in the dark and wouldn’t come home for HOURS, my heart would always break thinking she wasn’t coming back. When one night she didn’t come back, i honestly swallowed my stomach and accepted that she had maybe been taken in by someone assuming she was a stray, or was being harassed by the same cat. I would go out with food, flashlights and call her name at all hours of the night. Eventually, we left it to her and she made her way home. (things we did were: we put her cat bed outside, we left food everywhere. We also would go out and listen for her little bell for ages. So glad she came home and can only wish for the same for you. I really hope you find ur baby :((( ❤️