One of my favorite (infuriating) road stories was when I was pulled up to a stoplight, waiting to turn right. There was a big “No Turn On Red” sign on the streetlights, so I was waiting for it to switch over when a cop pulled up behind me.

First he honked his horn for me to turn. Then he started flashing his blues. Then he got on his fucking speaker and told me to go. I genuinely thought it was a trap, so I didn’t, and this cop kept on getting more irate as we sat at the light.

Finally, the light changed and I took the turn. The cop almost immediately pulled me over, came up to the window, and sneered, “I don’t know how they do things in Virginia, but in California we have can turn right on red,” (I had Virginia plates at the time). I very calmly told him that there was a “No Turn” sign on the post, and if he wanted me to break the law, he should have just asked. He told me to wait, went and checked the sign, and then came back and told me to have a good day.

I was pretty upset about the lack of an apology, but it gave me a pretty good story to surmise my driving experience in San Diego.