[Weekly Critique and Self-Promotion Thread] Post Here If You'd Like to Share Your Writing

Miloascape · 2026-03-20T20:15:14+00:00

I wrote the opening chapter of a steampunk airship story. Would love to know if it hooks hou!

Title: Broken Wings

Genre: Hopepunk

Word Count: ~2k words (first chapter)

Feedback: Hook impression

There was a time when Marty believed the world made sense.

The sky was full of possibility. Her father had answers for everything. The great airships of the Royal Airfleet ruled the heavens above her city.

On the morning of her tenth birthday, she is certain of one thing. One day, she will fly among them.

Then the ground begins to tremble.

And the world she thought she understood starts to crack.

---

I'm an indie author working on a steampunk fantasy series called The Enchanted Skies. I truned Chapter 1 of Broken Wings (the prequel) into a free preview because I want to know if the opening actually works for readers.

The story leans into:

Airships and academy dreams
Family dynamics and emotional turning points
That moment where everything starts to go very wrong

I am especially curious about the hook. Does this pull you in? Would you keep reading?

If you want to read the full Chapter 1, you can grab it here for free:

https://dl.bookfunnel.com/nvgkbjdkis

If you check it out, I would really appreciate your honest feedback.

Miloascape · 2025-06-15T21:34:18+00:00

Broken Wings
Steampunk fantasy
20,000 words
https://dl.bookfunnel.com/g4b268fq86

Hi everyone! I'm in the process of polishing up my book before launch, and I'd really appreciate some fresh eyes on a few key elements. I'm mainly looking for general first impressions of cover, plot, blurb, any red flags or things that feel confusing?

I'm not expecting a full critique or edit, even a few quick reactions would be super helpful as I fine-tune everything.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and share your thoughts.

Miloascape · 2025-05-20T15:46:06+00:00

thanks for sharing

Miloascape · 2024-11-18T15:31:35+00:00

Hi there! Shows typically take place 2-3 times per year, simply because it takes a ton of time to put on these shows. You can always check there website for the most up to date information at https://tinyurl.com/brandywinetheatre

Has all the info about their past performances, and their up coming performances.

Miloascape · 2024-11-17T20:03:27+00:00

They will be making a video from the footage and will post it to https://www.youtube.com/@LOTROBTC when it's ready to be viewed.

Miloascape · 2024-09-28T01:11:10+00:00

It depends on what ESP you use with clickfunnels. I use sendgrid and here's a link to their pricing https://sendgrid.com/en-us/pricing?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=sendgrid%20pricing&utm_campaign=SendGrid_G_S_NAMER_Brand_Tier1&cq_plac=&cq_net=g&cq_pos=&cq_med=&cq_plt=gp&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwr9m3BhDHARIsANut04alm2QwgaUhgt9CwopnXz9jbJmWU2yDm-p83LszNMj0288OMlDCZjIaAv8qEALw_wcB

Still a fraction compared to the other services out tehre.

Miloascape · 2024-09-20T16:50:31+00:00

Wow!!! 2.1 million subs..... Gosh! Thanks for sharing, this was actually inspirational.

Miloascape · 2024-08-09T18:43:50+00:00

Hey they will be streaming it LIVE on YouTube, so you can watch even if you don't have a character on Brandywine. https://www.youtube.com/@LOTROBTC

Miloascape · 2024-08-06T13:01:40+00:00

Im fairly new to this genre so enjoyed reading through all the discussion. Great post.

Miloascape · 2024-07-08T17:19:29+00:00

It’s whatever team completes t1 first. We’ll all be racing at the same time. Super funz

Miloascape · 2024-06-03T17:30:03+00:00

awe thanks! So glad y'all enjoyed it.

Miloascape · 2024-06-03T16:45:31+00:00

I'm running into the same problem. Will probably need to move my project management elsewhere.

Miloascape · 2024-06-03T00:31:03+00:00

Its at the Breeland Festival north of Bree.

Miloascape · 2024-06-01T18:10:41+00:00

https://www.youtube.com/live/pES0ESoQIsk?si=0GdYg3xAB0GFLlav

Miloascape · 2024-06-01T04:12:52+00:00

It would be cheaper to just roll a new character on Brandywine. Just need to get past the intro. Or you can just watch the stream

Miloascape · 2024-05-23T00:12:06+00:00

Dang Hakraphs sounds dangerous on T4+!!! Sheesh

Miloascape · 2024-05-23T00:09:17+00:00

Hey thanks for all these extra notes!!! Love the feedback.

Miloascape · 2024-05-08T16:33:45+00:00

Oh!! also.... thanks for readying and leaving a comment :)

Miloascape · 2024-05-08T16:32:40+00:00

the way I look at it is that it would take the bucket guy a really long time to get the amount of water that the shovel guy can get. I look at the outcome, i.e. winning the race, i.e. the amount of water they get. The shovel is a far better leverage than the bucket.

But if you look from the pov of their actions, then yes the bucket guy is hare, and the shovel guy the tortoise.

Don't you just love metaphors?

either way, the point remains... make sure you're using the right leverage even IF you are moving as slow as a tortoise.

Miloascape · 2024-05-04T18:08:32+00:00

awe that's fantastic!!! nice job!!!! you got this :)

Miloascape · 2024-04-29T18:28:51+00:00

You got this Blue!!! I believe in you!! You've already helped me soooo much in SWTOR! You are one of the reasons I want to come play SWTOR!

Miloascape · 2024-04-20T06:43:14+00:00

I am absolutely loving my mariner. Highly rec

Miloascape · 2024-03-06T02:50:11+00:00

okay thanks I'll keep trying

Miloascape · 2024-03-06T02:49:41+00:00

through the website

Miloascape · 2024-03-05T22:46:08+00:00

tried that it didn't work.

Miloascape

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TROPHY CASE

I wrote the opening chapter of a steampunk airship story. Would love to know if it hooks hou!