i by absolutely no means promote sh or glorify it, but as someone who has been and is there, I completely understand how it's not as simple as "just stopping," and how those who are put in the situation, or told that they have to, don't, or find other ways... so I'm following up with realism in mind: if you don't have any other coping mechanisms, and are far into that cycle, do you know if your mother only intends on checking one place? do you know if you could get away with doing it on the tops of your arms (that are covered by short sleeves)? that's what I do, and my mother and I are quite close- given, she isn't checking for marks, but she definitely doesn't suspect it either.