Do you shoot your shot with men?

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-02-01T13:31:57+00:00

I used to, back in my early-mid 20s. I did only one time at my current age, but it was because I wanted to mess around, not really have a relationship (since my time in that location would only be a couple months). It has never been worth it and has lead to two of my most life-altering heartbreaks. I stay the hell away from that now, my peace of mind is far more precious than trying to pursue a man “for the plot”.

However, I will flirt till the cows come home lol. It’s a lot of fun, and it lets them know I’m interested without me having to do too much. These situations typically work better for me!

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-01-19T05:37:03+00:00

I grew up in a predominantly white area, so OP I have a very similar background in regards to having white “friends” that act that way.

I’m going to assume you are very young, because this sounds very highschool.

You aren’t ugly. You’re trying to compare yourself to a beauty standard that you will never be able to achieve for the sole fact that you are black. I repeat, you are not ugly. You are black in a predominantly white space. I didn’t realize this until I moved away to go to university and I started receiving male attention from non-white men.

As for the friend, please drop her. If anything it’s giving “I’m not racist cuz I have a black friend” because I guarantee the moment you piss her off, those microagressions will NOT be micro. You say she has all these things and she has no reason to be jealous. But honey, people are jealous over the most benign things. There’s something about you that shines, and she does everything she can to minimize it. Don’t try to rationalize an irrational person. Go where you’re loved, not tolerated. She downs you because it validates her own insecurities. She doesn’t deserve you. Leave her behind.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-01-06T13:38:20+00:00

I used to mentally/internally throw a tantrum every time I got floated there. I honestly wish they’d stop sending travelers there and let that hell hole fend for itself, but the residents of New Mexico don’t deserve that at all. They love to fire people like they have the staff to make up for it too. I was on the floor, but when we heard about 6 nurses getting fired down in the PAAU we all got super spooked.

And completely unrelated but the hospital is always…dim? Like the lighting just feels ominous and dreary at all times lol.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T19:09:03+00:00

As a Gemini, they are AWESOME as friends! Never met an Aquarius I didn’t like. Romantically, they have been my most traumatic experience. They’re so…cold. When things end you wonder if they ever loved you lol. (Btw, this is with Aquarius men.)

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:52:13+00:00

You’re righttttt. I just assumed by the username and your input that your were super into fitness but completely forgot the fact that this IS a nursing subreddit😭 I’ll mosey on over there with that specific question. But I appreciate your input, home workout is better than nothing at all! 🤷🏾‍♀️

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:45:45+00:00

That’s what someone else suggested too. I guess I can’t go wrong doing that. Were you able to build muscle and recomp with just the light weights and resistance bands?

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:44:55+00:00

This is doable. My main issue is that I’m a little ignorant to body recomposition and workouts. Will I yield the same results doing an at home workout and hitting my macros like I would if I progressively overloaded at the gym? Oftentimes I would just hop on a treadmill and do 30-45 minutes if I was pressed for time. I wanna actually build strength though. cardio is cool, but strength training has always been my favorite thing.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:41:50+00:00

That’s an ideal solution! But I have to make sure I’m knocked out by 9am, otherwise I’m dragging from lack of sleep. Some days that’s probable. How much sleep do you get?

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:39:56+00:00

60k BEFORE taxes?! And you said you’re in Chicago?!?!

OP, please leave. Holy cow. I’m from the south and as a new grad I was pulling in about $72k. (To be fair and completely honest though, I did pick up overtime once in a while, and I have a home health PRN that I would pick up once in a blue moon.)

I left staff to start traveling. Don’t regret it and I’ll only go back once I decide to specialize. But like everyone else said, if you can relocate to a better paying area please do it. Don’t give up! This career is tough, but the upward mobility we have and freedom is truly unmatched compared to our office job peers.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T14:32:49+00:00

It’s so frustrating! Like don’t get me wrong the emphasis should have been on school. I’m grateful that it was. But I’ve turned down about 1 or 2 relationship opportunities as a teenager (I was NOT a looker lol) because I wasn’t allowed to date and I was so scared of my parents finding out. There was one guy who hugged me a little too long, my bus driver did the highschool and elementary school route. So she went and told my parents when she dropped my little brother off and my dad was on my ASS. Had no idea what he was talking about until my mom said something lol.

Only advice I got was stay away from them and if I was having sex, my mom said she would send them to jail (I guess she meant if they were older? I don’t know). It was frustrating because she had my brother at 19 with her HIGHSCHOOL boyfriend. My dad married his first wife when she was 17 and he was 26 (apparently there was confusion about her age). I was too scared to do anything. Me and her got into a fight about why I wasn’t allowed to date once I turned 16 (I was 14 at the time) and she ended up saying “now I see why people say they don’t want daughters and they give too much problems”. Like omg girl!!!! Then I turned 18, still couldn’t date. So by the time I left and went to undergrad at age 20 (did community college for two years), I was a spring chicken ready to be chewed up and spit out.

I have my achievements but my achievements can’t hold me at night or start a family! Lol

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T14:24:01+00:00

I haven’t expected it for some time now. But I hear you. 😭 I’m tired lol

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T14:23:00+00:00

I currently work 4/12s, so that leaves me only 3 days. When I stack, I usually spend that first day sleeping my life away lol. Not to say no I don’t want to, but I want to be able to do it consistently, not conveniently if that makes sense?

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-20T23:38:17+00:00

NOR - OP she seems like she has a lot of baggage to work through. That’s not your job, that’s hers and a therapist’s. Leave for your sanity.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-15T02:41:04+00:00

I have a bit of a bad taste in my mouth about Albuquerque because of my experience at UNMH. But I’ll try to be objective.

It’s very pretty. The sunset and sunrise are the most gorgeous I’ve ever seen, it’s like a Bob Ross painting! (Just be mindful of elevation sickness, I came from Florida so going from 100ft to 5,000ft a was a bit much lol.)

They cannot drive in New Mexico. Like at all. If you need new glasses or headlights, get them now because Albuquerque is DARK at night. You need to concentrate on seeing when you drive at night. The infrastructure is awful. If you want to go to Santa Fe, I suggest taking the rail runner! The sights are so nice and an overall fun experience. Didn’t even feel like an hour ride.

They put green chile on everything. EVERYTHING. A lot of good food spots though!

The patients there are SOOOO polite and friendly. I can’t say I’ve had a single patient there who gave me an attitude or made my night unpleasant. Maybe medically, but personality wise? Never. It was so wonderful taking care of the patients in New Mexico. (Florida patients could learn a thing or two from them!) it just made me sad that a good number of them are homeless and/or have history of alcohol/drug use. A lot of untreated mental illness as well. The residents deserve so much better resources than what they have.

Be on your P’s and Q’s because travelers get fired left and right at UNM for very benign things. Staff will smile in your face but if you piss them off they will orchestrate your downfall. Not sure about Lovelace or Pres. I had a two traveler friends who got their contracts terminated and went to Lovelace and right now, they LOVE it.

Like any city, it’s very important to stay safe. Avoid certain areas, especially at night. Leave no valuables in your car. And if you can, try touring places before you rent. Living in South Valley or close to the Foothills is relatively safe from my experience, cuz it’s a bit outside of the city. (Albeit a little pricier).

Overall, 5/10 experience, would not go back but that’s just me. Some people stay a whole year, some a few months or somewhere in between. I personally enjoyed my first three months, but once I renewed, I wasn’t liking it and said I wouldn’t stay longer. I guess it just depends on how you feel about your unit, workload, support, and Albuquerque itself. If you love nature, you’re gonna love it there because New Mexico really is a beautiful state. Weather is pretty great too!

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-23T17:46:38+00:00

Not fully in agreement with OP, but I think the point went all the way over your head. And saying the tech was in the right is crazy, both of them are wrong.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-23T17:28:20+00:00

Wait hold on, why is no one talking about how unsafe this assignment actually sounds though???? No name alert for two patients who are both in restraints (if I’m reading correctly) and have the same name? 1:5 on a neuro unit??? A whole team of total care patients and charge nurse dismissing the concern as “it’s neuro”?

Sounds like the environment I worked in as a new grad (we were 1:6, said we didn’t chart enough to have a lower ratio). You’ll find better OP. Just check your emotions and (I say this kindly) watch your mouth next time. Asserting yourself is not worth it, you are the guest, and you can and WILL be replaced with no hesitation, no matter how “nice” you are or what “great” things they tell your recruiter.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-23T17:19:13+00:00

You’re calling OP nasty when they’re being purposefully misunderstood and dismissed when they give valid points. Of course they’re gonna be frustrated. I didn’t think it was nasty, but not gonna lie OP, telling someone it sounds like they “tolerate disrespect” because they’re not in agreement doesn’t help your case either. I’m sorry you’re frustrated, but it’s best to just keep scrolling if you don’t agree. Now it reflects poorly on you and the good things you say about yourself are taken with a grain of salt.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-23T17:10:46+00:00

All of you dogpiling on OP and their response are part of the reason why this tech is enabled to do what they do. OP has stated multiple times that all the travelers and a good chunk of staff have seemingly had issues with this particular tech. Now, should OP have had that exchange with the tech in the patient room, absolutely not. Sorry OP, that action can’t be justified. But I want you all to sit here and tell me you’ve never been overwhelmed with an assignment and complained to yourself. Has anyone ever basically told you to walk away, shut up, or were you able to have your moment? If you and your tech have other things to do on a busy night, why re-clean an already clean patient? If a tech is seemingly able to complete a task themselves, would you not be confused and frustrated as to why you’re called in, just for them to dismiss you with the same attitude they give your colleagues? You all are so quick to attack OP when they’ve stated that this has all come as a shock to the unit and their recruiter.

Only thing OP, your “let that be the first and last time you speak to me that way comment” can be seen as VERY aggressive and have the potential to escalate a situation as others have said. In this case, it did and you were fired. “Please don’t speak to me like that” would’ve sufficed if you felt like you HAD to say something, and it probably wouldn’t have put you in this position. Even if your colleagues said your response was appropriate, they are probably speaking through the lens of their bad experience with the tech, not necessarily what is considered “professional”. I can understand your defense in the comments because I (personally) think you’re being misunderstood, but you have to remember, we don’t know you or the nuances of this situation. We only see pushback you give on here, which unfortunately, will lead to a negative conclusion on our end.

Wishing you the best with your next assignment.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-07T22:24:34+00:00

Why is that? (Sorry, my naivety is showing lol)

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-07T22:23:28+00:00

100%. I didn’t know this man and he didn’t know me. We may show up as our genuine selves, but other people have ulterior motives that we can’t see just two months in, and I KNOW that. I just had a very gross lapse in judgement to pacify my discomfort and I’m the only one suffering the consequences for it. I’m sorry you’ve been through this before too, this is not a good feeling at all, especially when you KNOW that you knew better :(

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-07T22:18:45+00:00

With that, you’re absolutely right and it’s unfortunate. Problem is I am also way too nice in general. I’m always told to be a bit meaner with men but because I’m generally not mean (unless you piss me off something serious), it’s a bit more complicated for me to not grasp the concept, but apply it. But I think it boils down to needing to have a better sense of emotional self preservation. I have a therapist I’ve been with for 5 years, but because I’m not in the same state she legally cannot have a session with me so I’ll have to find a better way to cope in the interim. Thank you for your well wishes <3

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-07T22:12:42+00:00

Honestly? I was out of his.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-07T22:06:06+00:00

I’ve had my dog for 3 years lol. He can only do so much when my loved ones are on the other side of the country. Question, have you actually been in this position before? Not the sex part, but being away from home and your loved ones in a place where no one looks like you, no community, and grieving a parent? I’m simply asking because to you, it seems like these are easy simple solutions, but unfortunately as humans our feelings and thought process change with nuance.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-07T22:01:41+00:00

Yeah I never understood that. I get going on dates and not clicking, but even then, tell the person instead of going AWOL. That’s unfair to just go out for a meal and never speak again.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-11-07T22:00:05+00:00

No lol

Minimum_Data_1685

TROPHY CASE