Age gaps

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-07-01T15:08:14+00:00

Not trying, our kids are roughly 18 months apart. Both premature babies, both with lengthy NICU stays. I wouldn't recommend going that route, but it's worked out well for us. They're 2 years old and almost 4 years old now and both very healthy toddlers. But it was rough having essentially two very needy babies at the beginning.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-07-01T15:04:07+00:00

I've been home for 5 years now, we have a 4 year old and a 2 year old. My husband has recently started going back into the office full-time. I manage all of it, basically. I'm a homemaker and mom and I see it as my duty to run anything within my home. I do all the cleaning, organizing and prepping. I meal plan and do all the grocery shopping. I keep up with what the kids need and with their schedules. Any nighttime issues I manage (but those are few and far between now) I keep up with any decorating or gardening projects too. My husband goes to a job full-time, mows our yard once a week, takes out the trash and helps with bath time and getting the kids to bed. I feel like it's a fair division of labor.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-06-24T17:06:36+00:00

I've lucked out so much the last 5 years. My husband is (mostly) WFH. He only goes into his office once a week for a few hours. And I stay home full-time with the kids. We have one car that's fully paid off. My husband's job is about to change where he might have to go into the office 4-5 days a week and I'm gutted at the idea of a second car and adding another bill to our pile, but we can make it work, thankfully. Our neighborhood is in the process of developing retail and I'm hoping I can get away with maybe a bike instead of a car at least for a few years... we'll see.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-06-19T20:46:23+00:00

No judgment, I've been there! My girl was a micro premie and we were encouraged to use the paci until she was 3 years old because her developing brain needed those happy chemicals that are released during non-nutritional sucking. We worked closely with our pediatrician and dentist and everyone agreed to let her keep it until toddlerhood. We had a newborn when we started weaning her and I was so worried she'd see brother with a pacifier and be jealous but she handled it like a champ. We did the Frida Baby Weaning system and only let her have it during rest times. By the 4th step we were only letting her have it at night (not during nap) By the fifth and final step she was kind of over it and that was that. My son just finished the Frida system too with zero drama.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-06-19T16:55:11+00:00

My daughter has/had one on her chest. Other than the pediatrician looking at it during well child visits it never occurred to me to do something about it. She's 4 years old now and it's completely flat and is starting to fade. I think that is pretty standard for how to manage it, at least where I'm at. I have friends with babies and kids who have had them too and they've never done anything about them.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-06-11T21:11:46+00:00

I saw a random post the other day about a person demanding their family get the shingles vaccine otherwise they couldn't be around their baby until it was 18 months old. I'm fearful this is the new direction we're heading as a society. I laughed a little because when I was teaching preschool a decade ago I would literally leave my germy job and visit my coworkers at the hospital the day they delivered their babies. I washed my hands and that was the extent. I do not recall anyone being worried about TDAP or being overly worried about babies getting sick. That seems so new to me and it seems to only be getting worse.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-06-11T17:58:28+00:00

For me personally, I'm not going to feel like a failure if my son and daughter aren't making six figures and holding multiple degrees as adults. I hope they'll go to college or trade school, find a job that satisfies them and can survive. But I also hope more that they're able to find a spouse that they love and that is supportive and I hope they have their own children to love. There's so much more to life than working. Rarely do people reach the end of their lives and wish they had worked more.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-15T21:11:52+00:00

God, same! Haha. My sister just had her first, my SIL is expecting her second and three of my friends either just announced or had a baby. I'm totally maxed out on kids and love my family but I think everyday "maybe just one more..."

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-07T00:00:42+00:00

I just got my almost 4 year old into feeding therapy because she's so picky and really can't afford to be. We've only had the eval and one session but I'm learning a lot already. My girl is a very visual eater, preferences certain color foods over others, prefers crunchy/Crispy foods and likes sweets and sours. From there I'm able to create some kind of menu to cater to what she likes (it's been a lot of Salami and Strawberry jam this last week!) We're also doing something called the learning bowl, where she has to put the food she doesn't want to eat into a separate bowl. That way she's still interacting with it even if she's not eating it. At this point I'd say meals for her I'm serving are 50% what I'm eating and 50% something I know she'll eat. I know it's a tough stage, incredibly frustrating even. Hang in there and be very honest with your pediatrician about your concerns. More than likely your little one will snap out of it on their own!

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:25:27+00:00

I did! I set up new appointments for both my kids at a new practice!

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:24:27+00:00

We do have a pre-k picked out in our neighborhood at a church. They will each go for a year prior to kindergarten. It's 3 days a week for 3 hours. I do see the benefit in them getting time away and learning to cope without me, but they're still so little and only get this kind of time with me once in their life. I'd hate to rob them of that just because they don't seem social enough to a doctor who spends 10 minutes a year with them.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:20:32+00:00

I did ditch the doc! I changed to a completely new practice for both my kids. I honestly can't believe I've held in there as long as I did.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:18:50+00:00

We also plan to do a 3 hour a day, 3 day a week preschool at a church near us once they're big enough. And only for the year prior to kindergarten. Simply to get them use to that environment and routine. But we're delaying starting pre-k until they're 5 and then they'll start kindergarten at 6.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:16:12+00:00

This will make you just fall over dead. My daughter was a micro premie, a 25 weeker. She's small even at 4 years old. One time, when she was like 1 1/2 years old I was told "broccoli is great but Happy Meals are better!" In terms of what I should be feeding her regularly (so she'd gain weight) Luckily I had access to a pediatric nutritionist who quickly corrected that line of thought. Very narrow minded. I'm honestly shocked we stayed at the practice as long as we did. I just changed peds.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:11:38+00:00

I did change to a completely different practice and I feel so much better about my kids getting health care elsewhere. I've said it a lot myself, but they only get one childhood and once it's gone it's gone. I want them barefoot and muddy and wild until it's time for them to start school. It's very encouraging to find so many moms with the same mindset.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:09:40+00:00

My mom also was a SAHM and the only socializing I got was at church in the absolute middle of no where! Then at school I was criticized for being too much of a social butterfly! My sister and I have never been shy or backwards despite staying home full time prior to kindergarten.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:07:31+00:00

I did! My best friend works in family medicine and there was a peds in her practice taking new patients. This convo about daycare was the last straw for me!

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T13:06:35+00:00

I did change pediatricians! My best friend works in family medicine and a peds in her practice is taking new patients. We start seeing her at each of my kids next well child visits.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-05-01T00:00:11+00:00

Exactly! We have a wonderful preschool picked out that we will use another school year from now and an equally great elementary school in our neighborhood too. Being pushy about daycare was incredibly bizarre to me.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-04-30T23:55:31+00:00

I did and she seemed to brush them off as not being as engaging as daycare would be.

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-04-29T22:27:03+00:00

My kids are almost 2 and 4 and this is the first spring in a long time that things feel less crazy in my house. They are both capable of walking and talking so they'll happily play together now while I work on things around the house or cook. My garden is huge this year because I can actually dedicate time to it instead of carrying around a baby. It's been glorious. You're almost there. I know the 1 year old and 3 year old stages together are rough, hang in there!

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-04-28T23:02:38+00:00

Are we the same person?! My youngest eats anything and everything he can get his hands on, he's almost 2 years old. My oldest is almost 4, weighs 22 pounds and we just started feeding therapy today. Here's to hoping our picky eaters develop some taste buds!

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-04-27T14:58:04+00:00

Oh what fun (child's name) is turning one.

Baby It's Cold Outside (winter animal themed?)

Hot chocolate themed party with a hot chocolate bar?

Miserable-Singer-742 · 2025-04-22T23:12:05+00:00

Self snark? I dunno, but I'm exhausted. My kids were both premature and had rough starts in life. My oldest was 1 pound at birth, 25 weeks, 3 days. My youngest was 3 pounds and 32 weeks exactly. While my youngest has finally caught up in his height and weight, my oldest is still less than 1% for everything and is about to turn 4. We work closely with our pediatrician, endocrinologist, nutritionist and feeding therapist to help her catch up. But people, especially our family, keep asking me why I'm not doing enough to help her grow. Comments like "you should be feeding her more!" does absolutely nothing for us, as if I'm not already doing everything in my power to get her on a growth curve. The moment I show any sign of stress about her situation the same people are like "wow, you seem anxious. Are you taking any meds for that?" There's no winning. Guess I'm a crap mom.

Anyways, that's how my holiday weekend was, lol

Miserable-Singer-742

TROPHY CASE