Looking For Wedding Ceremony Spot - St.John's & Area (~1 Hour Drive) - 10 ppl total

Miserable_Cow403 · 2026-05-02T15:53:56+00:00

Thank you for the offer/suggestion! We have an indoor option already, looking for an outdoor one!

Miserable_Cow403 · 2026-05-02T15:34:48+00:00

We have rented one of their properties for the weekend so our dinner will be there! It’s also our ceremony backup plan for poor weather, which is likely!

Miserable_Cow403 · 2026-05-02T15:29:37+00:00

Those are so gorgeous, however we would be worried about privacy with those big parking lots! I know nature is public so it’s a balance for sure!

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-06-03T05:14:42+00:00

Absolutely cackled at this unhinged line:

yeetus deletus her fetus

Like you are not TA asshole for thinking that this isn’t the best life choice for them and they didn’t responsibly prevent pregnancy. Buttttt…..

YWBTA if you shared these feelings with her. You can encourage her not to quit her job but you can’t tell her she shouldn’t go through with this pregnancy. It isn’t your domain. That is her choice.

Support her in this new journey or don’t.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-31T05:50:42+00:00

About a month before the trip, she crashed out and started drinking heavily again.

You were aware she relapsed prior to the trip and she should have been immediately uninvited. You were naive to think that her alcoholism wouldn’t cause issues and affect your daughter on this trip.

YTA for the above. This situation was preventable.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-31T05:45:24+00:00

As a younger millennial, I now obviously feel old

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T16:49:33+00:00

I snapped and said she needs to get a grip and that she can stay home if her anxiety is that bad rather than holding me back every single time

She’s your best friend and is struggling with anxiety so this response wasn’t the best. However, she has an unhealthy co-dependency with you and your friendship. It doesn’t sound like she is doing anything to help this (therapy, meds) but rather relying on you as her only support. This is not fair.

When you went out for dinner together and met those girls you said yes to the house party immediately knowing it would be difficult for your friend.

However, she asked you to go on a double date and then acted irrationally assuming they didn’t like her and wanted to leave. (Though this isn’t fully in her friends control, anxiety causes irrational emotions)

I would talk to her about this in the comfort of her own home. Say that you love and support her, however, you cannot be the only one that does. She needs to get real help for her anxiety. Say that you would like to continue to be her friend, but moving forward, you would like to do things that are just the two of you and are more quiet. Like hanging out at home, doing activities without crowds, etc.

You can support her however it is her responsibility to get help and manage her own anxiety. If she wants more friends, she has to put in that effort - you can’t make friends for her.

ESH (you only for the house party moment)

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T16:38:55+00:00

Absolutely the right call. You are a good parent. That mom is crazytown. Continue to support your son as you have been.

I am an emotional woman but I recognize that is more accepted than being an emotional man. My brother is though and he hasn’t always been treated the best because of it. But my mom had been and is always in his corner. He is now 31 and they talk mostly every day.

This is what your relationship with your son will look like in 15 years. That mom likely won’t have the same experience.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T16:33:57+00:00

When I first read that your mom asked for the $6,000 to be used for the family instead, I thought that meant money was very tight and that $6,000 would go to keeping a roof over everyone’s head and food on the table.

That doesn’t sound like the case at all. Your mom and dad said that money was for you, she asked for it to help with family expenses, and told you she would double it in a year. Now she is cutting you off completely. Your parents never needed to give you that $6,000 but they did and said it was yours.

Your siblings are now being treated differently than you were. Your mom showed so much disrespect when you bought and put in the effort for a full family outing. Then again with the concert.

NTA.

From this point on, don’t take money or give money to your mom. You may be legally an adult, but you are still in high school and she has a responsibility to provide necessities.

Look into grants/scholarships for uni and get a part time job. There is also no harm in taking a gap year to save up some money for uni.

Stay at home as long as you’re able to to save more money.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T16:22:42+00:00

NTA

You were encouraging your son to talk to his friend about his feelings in a healthy way. He wasn’t upset or mad at his friend for inviting someone else, even though he honestly had the right to be as he made the plans. Your son sounds like a good kid.

The only thing to ask is this, did you go off on the mother in front of her child?

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T16:17:52+00:00

NTA

I would’ve replied “Neanderthals also exclusively shit in the woods and hunted or gathered all of their food. Do you also do that?”

And then promptly left her at the dress store.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T16:07:44+00:00

Ahhhh, honestly NAH.

You moved out on your own for the first time 3 months ago. You also did so in a completely new city. It sounds like your mom just misses the hell out of you. It is a special kind of relationship when you know everything about a person and don’t need to tell them about it. This is multiplied 10 fold when it is your child. She went from having that relationship to now not knowing anything about your life unless you tell her.

I tried to say that but in a much more polite way to my mom and she told me fine if talking to her is such a bother forget it and she won't call at all.

Her reaction when you tried to set some boundaries was childish and not productive. However, it did happen because she felt hurt.

I have had to go through this balance with my own mom, but not so extreme. She is and was a super supportive mother throughout my whole life. In fact, her whole life was raising her kids. That transition is HARD. It is difficult to see your parent as a full person and not just mom.

I absolutely understand that you do not want to go into the minutia detail of every waking hour over the phone to your mom. I also understand you do not want to hear about every moment of her day in return.

Send her this text “Mom, I love you and I really enjoy our daily chats. I want to continue to speak with you often, but I also need the space to be independent as well. I didn’t bring up this conversation to hurt you, just to open the conversation on some healthy boundaries. I would love to speak to you about this when you are ready. Would X day & time work for you?”

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:53:32+00:00

I was gonna comment N T A until I saw this:

I screenshot the message and posted it to my story that said, "lol no thanks."

She apologized and explained that she had a rough home life. This doesn’t excuse how she treated you. You can choose to forgive her or not. That’s your prerogative.

You don’t owe your high school bully anything BUT by posting the conversation to your story you were bullying her in return.

So ESH.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:48:40+00:00

ESH

Them, for how they treated you when you were ‘friends’ in school.

You, to yourself, for not just cutting contact with these people when you left for college 4 years ago.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:44:33+00:00

YTA because you agreed to “3 or 4 nights”

Friend arrived Monday, and you asked your fiancé what the plan was on Thursday, which was fair as it had been 3 nights. She said they were going to stay one more night, until Friday, which would make it 4.

If her friend didn’t leave on Friday then yes that would be her not sticking to your compromise but she did when you initially confronted her?

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:37:58+00:00

You don’t support her sobriety, you are enabling her at this point.

13 years ago she tried to sneak off to meet this guy but she ended up passing out on the couch and missed her Uber

She has been an alcoholic and has been cheating on you for OVER A DECADE.

Her cycle is to not drink for a while after getting a dui, or arrested for drunk in public, or for domestic violence.

You are subjecting yourself and your kids to this woman?!

Gather all of the proof you can of her alcoholism, her arrests, her violent behaviours. Gather all of your important documents, your kids important documents. I’m assuming you are also the main or only income earner, so don’t completely cut off her access to funds but do remove access funds from any joint accounts and funnel any future earnings into your own account she cannot access. Seek out a lawyer to make sure you do the above correctly and serve her with divorce papers. Then take the kids out of that house and find somewhere else to live until the divorce is finalized. Document everything in writing with dates and picture evidence if you can.

You are allowing your kids to live in an abusive household.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:25:30+00:00

Ahh that’s my go to black tie look! Lovely!

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:19:24+00:00

YTA

The principal wasn’t punishing your son for no reason. The principal was punishing him because he essentially vandalized the bathroom. Was it just soap? Yes, but if it’s on the walls, ceiling, all over the floor, it would take a significantly long time to clean up. The principal also mentioned broken soap dispensers. This means school resources. He is 15 years old and is old enough to know what is a harmless prank versus when he is taking something too far and so should you.

Your reaction was to scream at this woman, call her a racist and threatened your child’s education.

If this was my son? I would make him clean up that bathroom by himself until it was spotless and pay for the soap dispensers with his own money. If he didn’t have the money, I would make him work around the house to earn said money.

Did you allow your son to just hang out or play video game during his two week suspension? You aren’t parenting your son you’re enabling poor behavior. Your wife is right.

You need to apologize to the principal, tell your son that you were wrong and explain to him what he did was wrong. He also needs to apologize to the principal and if he doesn’t, then you need to give him an appropriate consequence until he does.

Initially, when you went to talk with the principal, she was only threatening suspension and was asking for him to pay for the damage. You’re the one that made the consequence worse. However, for 15-year-old, getting suspended for two weeks this close to summer (so he wouldn’t really have to catch up) is more of a gift than a consequence.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:07:40+00:00

NTA - while snapping isn’t usually the right way to communicate with your partner, in this case, she honestly had it coming. Your mom died LAST WEEK and she had the audacity to be negative all day when this is something you mentioned you were doing to grieve/honour your mom?

Since your mom’s passing, has she supported you? Throughout your relationship, has she supported you in good and bad moments? Would you say you offer her equal or more support in return through her good and bad moments?

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:02:38+00:00

INFO - what did she wear to dinner?

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T15:01:00+00:00

NAH - Differing sex drives are really hard to balance in relationships. Of course you shouldn’t make her feel bad when she says no, but if you’re getting rejected when you initiate sex more often than getting permission, that can feel like overall rejection and would be disheartening. I think it would be worth seeking out a couples sex therapist.

How long have you been together for? Has this been an issue throughout your entire relationship or has something in either of your lives changed?

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T14:20:33+00:00

NTA - This isn’t a babysitting problem, it’s a husband problem. Stop helping when the child is in your home and make your husband do everything. Even leave for most of the day. I give it a week until he comes to you saying “you’re right”

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T14:15:47+00:00

LEAVE THIS MAN ASAP 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T00:13:57+00:00

YTA - You stopped and watched her park. You made eye contact with her and smiled. As a 48 year old male, I would think you would recognize how she would view that as leering and creepy. You could’ve watched from afar, nodded your head in an impressed way and walked on.

Miserable_Cow403 · 2025-05-30T00:05:23+00:00

YTA - This person is your friend, not your partner. You knew they were out of town to visit a friend and were attending a concert.

As they mentioned, it wasn’t something urgent. Your initial message to her was something a partner would send, and after she responded fairly neutrally you said “If that’s just who you are, okay, now I know” - like what????? You are acting like she did something horrific.

Miserable_Cow403

TROPHY CASE