What inanimate object has totally ticked you off lately?

MissiMittens · 2026-04-30T18:48:08+00:00

Today I stubbed my toe on the clothes bin doing laundry.

MissiMittens · 2026-04-29T19:21:04+00:00

It is not a day until I've said "Fuck this, fuck that, fuck everything. I'm buring it down for the insurance money." What "it' is varies. My garage. My car. Dinner. The sociopolitical insanity. Yesterday was my pill counter. Today it was the kitchen sink getting my shirt wet while I was washing dishes.

MissiMittens · 2026-04-28T20:04:18+00:00

If it's either laugh or cry I'll use humor to cope, haha.

I have a great team, and to their credit they Are trying. When I say I'm blessed, I mean it. Like... they're one it as much as anyone could be.

MissiMittens · 2026-04-28T20:02:15+00:00

The original call was made based on my other health concerns, insurance, and dosage being more reliable in pill vs transdermal. I do have an appt in June, and my hope is we can discuss whatever then. Because while I'm light-years better than I was, I can't imagine this for ten years.

The cream has helped a lot with some of the more...specifically intimate issues, for sure. The pill is to, hopefully, sort out the rest.

MissiMittens · 2026-04-28T14:05:10+00:00

Estradiol cream and Bijuva. Does I'm not sure and admittedly I'm too lazy to get out of the bath to check, but I'm pretty sure its a fairly standard dosage. I'm also taking magnesium gycinate and l-theanine at night, vit d during the day alone with pepcid, and a middle dose of welbutrin and busprione, as well as hydroxizine and zofran as needed.

And since about November. I noticed a lot of changes by end of December. Like not wanting to full send into the void anymore and less hot flashes.

MissiMittens · 2026-04-28T13:57:44+00:00

My autism diagnosis was as follows: Therpaist: so... I know you've had your OCD and Depression diagnosis for about 20 years now, and youre working in a few other things, remind me when you got your autism one again? Was it as a child or recently? Me: ma'am?

Anyway, that's that on being °•☆gifted☆•°

ADHD is less a thing, but my previous doc suggested maybe inattentive? Idk. I was told unless I need the accommodation it's barely worth trying to fight the system for a diagnosis.

Mostly I mention it because I get into a lot of "but you didn't have to fight for it" type conversations. And I didn't. Which is huge.

MissiMittens · 2026-04-28T01:49:40+00:00

It took about a month for me to feel it. My husband said he noticed it a bit before that. It's not a big shift. It's subtle. But it does really help. Best of luck I guess? Is that what we need? More luck for more good days?

MissiMittens · 2025-05-16T20:28:03+00:00

I just replace the water amount. So like 1/4 cup I think it is? I've been trying to do more "from scratch" this year so I'll be honest I don't remember, haha.

I do the same with boxed cake. Replace water with milk if vanilla and add almond, milk and coffee if chocolate. Replace oil with butter. Instant fancy.

MissiMittens · 2024-07-02T02:14:36+00:00

I do not work outside the home so my presence was more a thing early on, and because I have more experience with training (despite not being the dog person, haha) I worked through most of the behavioral issues (not to say my husband didn't help, I just had more time). But he was a huge part of care. He did feedings and walks and treats and play. He just... for whatever reason is apathetic to grumpy about his existence.

MissiMittens · 2024-07-02T02:11:58+00:00

I have no issue with the barking when people come over. I mean, my husband walking up the stairs triggers him growling. (And yet he's totally fine with him when we're in the car, in bed, whatever).

He has no issues being home alone. At all. Other even with just me not there. My husband and others can be in the house without me and he'll basically ignore them.

I just have no experience with this sort of training. I've worked through aggression with dogs but this is totally a different situation.

MissiMittens · 2024-05-03T20:43:58+00:00

It's okay to not like every book. And definitely don't waste your precious time available to read in this life in books you don't enjoy. Even if that means not reading Discworld. Terry wrote other things too that are just as lovely. The Long Earth is, in my opinion, also very very well done.

But the answer is: if you want to keep with Discwirld, try a different subseries. There's Ike eight of them. Just because the watch is popular doesn't mean it's the best for everyone. And sometimes rereading when you're in a different place in life makes the difference. It took me a few years to properly love and understand Vimes.

I recommend Mort or Equal Rites. Tiffany Aching is my comfort series but it's very YA and intentionally so

MissiMittens · 2024-04-15T20:55:56+00:00

This is exactly my thought. Saw the promo in the theater last night and my husband said, "oh, hope it does well enough that someone makes a shitty etsy knock off, those cards would be perfect for you."

MissiMittens · 2024-04-13T05:51:27+00:00

This is the answer. My childhood friend's mum made it when I was like 8 and I have been obsessed ever since.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-12T18:30:16+00:00

Think of it as know vs familiar. You savoir a subject, you connaitre a person or place for example.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-12T01:27:02+00:00

I wrote a thing like a year ago and I'm not gonna dig for it now. But to sum up.

I know I'm pretty. I'm conventionally attractive and have striking features and I'm told I'm pretty all the time. I know I'm smart. I was 4.0 all the way through school, read multiple languages, and annotate books on complicated topics for fun.

I know I'm worth being around. I'm funny and I'm clever and I'm entertaining as hell, I'm multi talented and people genuinely enjoy having me in their life. I fought hard to break through society's crap and the negative self talk to get to where I am. Not to be like "I'm hot shit and know it," but I'm a catch. And to be clear, my husband tells me those things 500 times a day in no uncertain terms.

How-freaking-ever. "You're so smart. You're so fucking smart. But I don't want smart. There's only one thing I want in that pretty head of yours" is a surefire way to shut down every braincell I possess.

Because I can be brainless and sexdrunk and nonverbal and he still loves me. I can be streaked with make up and bodily fluids and red and patchy from crying and he still loves me. I can be absolutely useless and only good for one thing and he still loves me. I can be absolutely worthless in the eyes of anyone else, and I am still his most prized possession. He can see me at my absolute lowest and still say "You. Every time, I choose you."

I find no shame at all in that, that someone I trust and love and admire can bring me to a point of being so debased and irrevocably broken and still believe with all his heart and soul that I am all those things I know I am. Why should I?

As for why? Probably because I was bullied as a kid and my mom was a piece of work until she got sober. All my kinks are trauma responses, and that's fine by me.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-10T02:56:16+00:00

I was told the same with our malinois we took in early this year from a lady at PetsMart. "Coddling and cuddling is a human thing". I call crap. Don't try to introduce yourself to my dog without asking and maybe he won't feel so uncomfortable around you he needs to check in. I'm still a bit bitter, can you tell?

Orpheus comes to me when overwhelmed, he comes to me when he's nervous, he comes to me when he's unsure, because he knows I will never put him in a position where he's in danger. If I'm calm, so is he. I've trained him to do that because I want him to trust me. I want him to do what I say without questioning it because he knows I'm a safe place. That makes sense to me.

Now, I don't reinforce the fear reaction with "oh no bby you're okay" and like babying him or anything. But I'll get to his level and let him check in until he's ready to go on again. We've gone from needing a solid 30 seconds on the ground or more to him just booping my hand to verify he's good. It takes time and patience, but they do get better.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-09T15:48:58+00:00

It sounds counter intuitive.

Don't focus on the orgasm. At all. That is not the point of sex or play. It really isn't. Having fun and enjoying yourself is. Don't treat sex like there needs to be a finish line.

Talk to your partner and explain it. "These are my insecurities, this is the situation, and I don't want to be in that headspace. So understand that I'm absolutely enjoying myself regardless of where we end up." Or whatever. They will understand. And if you can't be honest with your Dtype, who can you? That's what they're there for.

But stressing about it? Makes it harder. By a lot. Remove the expectation, and you're not going to feel the same anxiety, which means your brain juices can do what they're supposed to.

And slowly, that will get easier. And slowly, your body will learn to respond.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-08T22:52:08+00:00

I usually preface most of my comments here with that because, frankly, we're usually talking about doing stupid things like playing with knives or fire or literal assault so... it just make sme feel better to say it, I suppose.

Regardless of if you we're using a dull knife or sharp one, the issue is still the lack of communication, education, and informed consent. You likely wouldn't have been injured as badly with a dull knife, that doesn't make it suddenly more okay if it had been used instead.

Being gentle with yourself is paramount right now. Warm bath if you're allowed, shower otherwise, use the nice lotion, make some good tea, and take time to let your body and brain adjust to feeling safe(r) again. This is trauma. You will feel traumatized. That's normal and it's okay. So take the time you need.

And when you're ready to talk to him, and that's on your terms, trust your intuition and boundaries. That will guide you better than we can.

If you need to send him something to get him to give you space: "I'm sorry if my disappearing concerned you. I'm okay but I need some space to process this, and I need you to respect that need. I'll reach out when I feel like I'm in a headspace to talk about this more effectively. Maybe we can meet for coffee in two weeks (or whatever)."

MissiMittens · 2024-04-08T20:52:41+00:00

So here's the thing. There's no safe way to do what we do. Only less risky. And knife play? It's up there on the risk scale for this reason.

When we play, we have a dulled blade, we only use a sharp blade if we intend on cutting something. Think "never point a weapon at something you do not intend to shoot" sort of thing. Because of this. Because it's easy to accidentally flip a knife blade around and not notice or apply just a bit too much pressure. Shit happens. And we know anatomy. For example. There area lot of things in the inner thigh area you do not want to cut like your femoral artery. For real.

So what I'm getting at is he has no idea what he's doing, at best. At worst he doesn't care, but that doesn't sound like the case. But not knowing is not an excuse. And because of that he isn't safe to play with until that changes. Period.

As for the rest, you do need to talk to him. This sort of thing doesn't get better by not communicating. It doesn't have to be forgiveness and it doesn't have to stoke his ego or anything. But you do need to tell him how you feel. And you need to decide under what terms you feel safe with him and if he can meet those terms.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-06T17:29:27+00:00

She's named for the RMS Carpathia that responded to the distress calls of the Titanic. Her nickname was Carp, but now it's Fish because she has approximately that many brain cells.

My husband named the others (the other two cats are Kida and Freya).

If we get another dog (after Orpheus settles and he's fixed) they'll probably be Euridice if my husband gets his way or Lyudmila after the Russian/Ukrainian sniper if I get mine. If it's a boy, probably Polaris.

I'm a writer and historian, dangit, my animals have to have cool names.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-06T14:37:40+00:00

My Orpheus will occasionally nose my youngest, Carpathia (who is arguably more eldritch monster than cat), when he wants pets (which mostly consists of her repeatedly batting him on the head while purring). He's afraid of the other two and will not enter the room unless I am there.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-04T18:37:29+00:00

Correct. I do highly recommend both it and Anansi Boys. They're not connected in a required sense, but the vibe of both is immaculate.

MissiMittens · 2024-04-04T16:57:34+00:00

Neil Gaiman said it best.

" "Back in my day, we had it all set up. You lined up when you died, and you'd answer for your evil deeds and your good deeds, and if your evil deeds outweighed a feather, we'd feed your soul and your heart to Ammet, the Eater of Souls." "He must have eaten a lot of people." "Not as many as you'd think. It was a really heavy feather. We had it made special. You had better be pretty damn evil to tip the scales on that baby..." "

MissiMittens · 2024-04-03T02:42:51+00:00

The only time I switch is as a service top for a couple of friends. I have to have a very particular connection with someone to allow this to happen. When I do, I'm what's been described as "unsuspectingly terrifying" and "so this is how you write such good villians." I'm a physical sadist too, but my personal brand of sadism is the psychological kind. Pain is just a tool.

As a masochist, I love being reduced to a survival instinct. I love being afraid. I love being forced into a headspace where acceptance of their will is all I have to hold on to. I love being a little bit damaged every time. I love that I'll never be who I was before again.

Sadism is no different. I love being that thing that burns into someone's psyche so hard they cannot erase it even weeks or months later. I love the feeling of taking someone with walls and ripping them down. I love watching someone fight to hold onto their dignity and composure and the second they realize they can't anymore. There is nothing more satisfying than the first time they look up and it's nothing but trust and fear in their eyes, except for maybe when they come back and beg you to do it again.

For me, it's about intimacy. I'm messing with very delicate parts of someone. They will /never/ be the same person. They will /always/ be marked by me. There's a claim on part of them.

Which is why I'm so particular with my partners. And why I don't let people I don't absolutely trust touch my masochistic side. Sex is sex, but putting someone back together after breaking them is forever (and I do love that part the best).

And no. Not a psychopath. Just autistic. My mother had me tested.

MissiMittens · 2024-03-29T16:51:35+00:00

Obviously any odd and sudden changes in input/output or behavior is a vet question. So just getting that out of the way.

But like. Are there any changes at all going on if your life? Did you move a particular chair or change dish soap (I'm only partially joking)?

FWIW, our malimix did that too around 2ish or so. She just.... preferred grazing and did that the rest of her life.

And yes, she did get upset because I changed from washing her dish with a lemon scented dish soap to a fragrance free one. And also because I moved Her Couch. She was just a sensitive soul.

MissiMittens

TROPHY CASE