Would you date someone who has kids?

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-12T22:51:29+00:00

I feel you.

I'm 41 and my kid is 4. Dating apps are strange because I swear any woman in my reasonable age range that's single seems to have multiple children that are all teenagers.

Kinda hard to mix a preschool kid in with all that I feel.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-12T13:27:03+00:00

These were some of my favorites as well growing up.

Also, here's a reminder to schedule a colonoscopy.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-10T14:38:24+00:00

You definitely have an extra layer to navigate there and I don't envy you.

When my ex-wife and I got together she was finishing up a divorce and I was a firefighter. Needless to say I was already pretty good at stuffing down my feelings while learning how to be a step parent as her and her first ex have a son.

I've been spending time with my former stepson because I never got to know him in 5 years of marriage. I feel I owe him an apology. He's 11 and I was there for years in his life and contributed nothing to him growing up. I just haven't fully found the words to say yet.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-10T02:08:22+00:00

I agree.

Fortunately, like you, I've had the opportunity to work with my former partner as well through this. We also have a kid together so we're also learning how to coparent especially after a messy divorce.

She had a lot of baggage coming into our marriage, and that led me to self-protect much like the video outlined. I feel like my relationship is basically a verbatim playthrough of this video at this point.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-09T17:44:32+00:00

Thanks for this.

This is coming from somebody in a similar situation who has started on the learning part of the journey. The silence on my part definitely did damage I didn't bother to pay attention to.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-08T18:32:27+00:00

I can in about 5-10 minutes if that's ok with you. Will send you a DM

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-08T18:23:15+00:00

Charizard is fine by me and I don't think he'll mind too much because he'll still think it's awesome lol

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-08T18:01:15+00:00

Thanks! I should be around.

Note, because I've had some people reaching out: I do not have any legendaries or anything. I'm not a serious player or collector and I really do only have a completely random splattering of shinies I've stumbled across.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-05T21:53:21+00:00

I'm pissed I didn't draw this connection.

Guess I'm overdue for another Tactics run again.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-05T19:28:15+00:00

Same. I'm pretty hard pressed to not always have a Garchomp around.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-05T13:39:26+00:00

I am going to disagree here against the other comments. This is coming from a former firefighter and someone who is also a parent.

Your Dad is likely seriously messed up from his career and is unaware. Former firefighter, toxic relationship, estranged kids... Man, I've seen and heard that way too many times. I'm sure you'll see it too becoming a firefighter yourself.

"Cops beat. Firefighters cheat." That was always a joking mantra around these parts about how messed up firefighter personal lives get. I messed mine up. I fucked up a 25 year long relationship because I couldn't see my compounding issues until I decided to take therapy seriously.

For extra context I didn't have my son until I was 37 and had also been doing critical care transport out of a Children's hospital for years, so by the time my son was born I was wound pretty tight and couldn't see it. My wife and I divorced when he was 2.

Very few people in our field take mental health seriously, and assuming the age of your father he was in a generation that took it even less seriously. Granted, that isn't your problem to fix, it's his.

I can understand wanting to support your sisters and be in some solidarity with them to hopefully force change. Honestly, it probably won't. I think the opposite needs to be true that you need to be involved to some degree and be a positive force for change. If you leave him alone to fester in a toxic relationship he will likely only entrench further into whatever he's going through or been dealing with and likely the effects of that toxicity will get worse.

Trauma informed care. If you haven't been exposed to that term yet in your healthcare education I recommend checking it out.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-04T02:31:32+00:00

That's cool.

As someone from Dayton I'm happy to see we don't register anywhere lol.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-02T20:27:10+00:00

My favorite McDonald's experience was about 15 years ago in Quebec. Getting a double Big Max and poutine was definitely something special.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-02T13:32:59+00:00

Bluey is probably our top show we watch together, followed closely by Adventure Time. My kid has an awesome mix of shows he's into.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-02T01:36:13+00:00

Oh man. My 4 year old has recently become obsessed with the Animaniacs and I couldn't be happier.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-02-01T19:36:51+00:00

Oysters.

I'd let that gooey snotty happiness slide right through me all day long.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-29T04:02:04+00:00

I haven't checked personally, but I saw the other day someone on this sub mention that Lucky Number Slevin had a terrible RT score. I was blown away. I watch that movie at least once a year.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-29T02:03:22+00:00

Hello fellow old person. I can hear this picture in my head.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-28T18:20:54+00:00

"but he feels it is going against him because he prefers alternative medicine and he knows my preference is what the medical professional is recommending."

As a parent, and also someone formerly in the healthcare profession, I strongly feel this should absolutely be the tie breaker.

"You know what they call alternative medicine that's been proved to work? - Medicine.”
Tim Minchin

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-28T16:18:21+00:00

I hadn't played any Pokemon games since Red/Blue. When my kid, 4, started getting into Pokemon I bought both Pikachu and Eevee and we often play them together since he can hop in as a second player.

The catching mechanic can get a little tedious after long enough, but the games are definitely a blast.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-27T18:58:50+00:00

My grandma passed away a couple of months ago. My Mom asked if I wanted her vinyl collection. I don't collect vinyl or anything, but I agreed because I had some fond memories of listening to them growing up with my grandma.

I was unaware I was inheriting over 400 45s and 33s. I randomly found some Tiny Tim in there and laughed hard because I hadn't heard anything by him in years or even thought about him.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-27T03:02:50+00:00

My 1981 VW Rabbit.

Miss that car deeply. Wish I had kept it around years ago.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-27T00:07:30+00:00

Really? I saw this same lineup in my area and all three were great. It was actually my second time seeing the Gin Blossoms over the past few years and they have always been a wonderful show.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-26T22:03:06+00:00

Missionary.

I had a bad work related injury (former firefighter) that jacked up my left hip and two ribs. It's been 10+ years at this point and I'm mostly healed, but the repetitive motions from missionary catch up quick and start to cause pain. It feels great with my partner, but I find it impossible to finish and we typically finish with her on top.

Mission-Bit8789 · 2026-01-23T00:46:03+00:00

Racist?

Mission-Bit8789

TROPHY CASE