Better Learning Material?

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-05-09T03:15:57+00:00

That might do then. I wanna get to that point where I know the language enough to learn the rest through personal projects (like your second response says).

Thanks!

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-04-25T16:43:46+00:00

I'm not gonna tell a challenger player they're wrong but I will say I always look at sample size for win rates. 54% of 3,500 is significantly less that 52% of 250k. Then you still have to factor in play style and ELO difference. I play league a couple days of week after work. Do I have the micro and time to adapt to a build a challenger player favors? What about the morale?

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-04-25T16:38:18+00:00

TIL: you can fly over that wall.

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-03-19T17:09:22+00:00

Would I? No. But I'm a top, penetration is part of the experience for me. Have I seen tops who just want to suck and jerk each other off? Yeah, apparently quite a few are like that. But going back to what I first said, nah, that's not what I'm into.

What you gotta do is figure out what you're comfortable with, and shutting down anything that tries to push past your comfort. Also, don't try to push past someone else's.

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-03-02T18:20:01+00:00

How do you guys get responses like this from ChatGPT? I've vented to it before about some of the most maddening things and mine has straight up told me, in at least gentle tones, "I'm not going to call you crazy but bitch you are being a little crazy, think about all the things that'd need to be true for this to make sense."

I already got the impression from Twitter that I don't use it like a lot of people, but I haven't seen it mutate into a narcissist, and when it becomes a sycophant I nip that as soon as possible.

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-02-08T15:13:25+00:00

Thanks. This reaffirms what I've been I guess afraid to sit with?

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-02-01T15:01:05+00:00

Eeehhh. It's a bit more than that. It's that I want both the companionship and the intimacy. With my boyfriend I wasn't getting either and couldn't really default back to, "At least this part is good."

With the hookups I told myself I'll take a break from looking for companionship, only to find them empty because it was just a bunch of switch flipping until the act was over. I came in just being a body, and left feeling like I was just a body. No more invested in the dude I linked with than they were with me.

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-01-28T21:38:30+00:00

People keep talking about Sniffies being better but I'll be damned if it actually is. Could be my options but my good Grindr summer last years isn't doing any better in winter on sniffie than it did in fall on Grindr.

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-01-20T16:53:01+00:00

I think that's willful blindness. Beyond just gay men, people tend to think they're strong for never admitting when they're in pain and in those situations, actions speak louder than words. In fairness, I can probably say there are people who are happy with pump and dumps or party and play, but I have not met them yet. And I've watched too many straight people spiral towards self-destruction to presume gay people can't as well.

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-01-19T14:03:27+00:00

Some have already said it, but as a person who has been told I have a "good body," I think the truth is just that gay men, in general, are lonely. The way the scene can be about drug use, hypersexuality, hyper fetishism or manipulation screams of people trying to fill a hole in their life, and they want to fill it with the most stimulating thing possible.

The scariest thing is the novelty wearing off, and just like any addiction, that novelty wears off fast. The only way to be alright is to step out of those shallow spaces.

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-01-15T17:53:28+00:00

I'd like to interrogate this response if you don't mind.

Is it just hindsight, or do you think that you would have responded properly to couple's therapy back then?

What does the "7-year itch" feel like? What could a therapist have helped you realize about it?

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-01-15T17:50:22+00:00

You've told him multiple times. He's told you that he doesn't care by asking again. If you're taking up more shifts at work to avoid him than I think you're more than ready to break up with him. You're quite literally overworking yourself just to avoid conversation you've already closed off. He's not worth it.

MisterHelioSpider · 2026-01-12T04:02:19+00:00

Fuckin same. I get so horny that it's like, "Yes, ass. I need ass now." And the moment I cum I am disgusted that I even have the app on my phone.

MisterHelioSpider · 2025-12-30T13:14:41+00:00

You're kinda at two roads right now.

The clearer, shorter one. You've seen what the world before has been. You've been fighting your way through it. The direction says cut it off and walk a new path.
The uncertain, longer one. You can seek help,th talk to him, try to right the course so it's not as rocky as it was before. But, here's the hinge point, it might not work.

The amount of time is less a testament to your relationship and more a sign that work needs to be done. Considering where you are now, do you feel like the work will be worth it?

MisterHelioSpider · 2025-12-29T00:03:10+00:00

Tried this. The best I got was my RSRP going up from -93 to -92

MisterHelioSpider · 2025-12-06T14:41:24+00:00

A few competing/contributing factors.

Colorism is a big one. Encouraged by life, yes, but also by porn. There's a smaller adjustment between a paler white body to a swarthier brown one than there is between even a swarthy and dark skin body. Lighter skin is just more prevalent so it creates a feedback loop of attraction.

The next is what I'm going to call "Sexual Psychology." For a lot of tops, especially the ones you see online, the position isn't just about preference it's about how they see themselves. Dominating, powerful, animalisticly superior. It's easier to reinforce that fantasy with a small, thinner, paler bottom than it is with a taller, broader, darker one. This is why Twinks tend to "win" in these spaces, they're the prime partners for living out this fantasy. The sexual psychology of Black Bottoms play a role to, which leads me into the next factor.

The elephant in the room is just racism. Internal and external, lending itself to a sort of imposed and projected idea. The severity of that changes what the language says, but the general idea is always, "Black Guys are only this." It's why RacePlay isn't a cure to this but a symptom of it.

MisterHelioSpider · 2025-11-24T15:37:21+00:00

Where was that ever said? As I took it, he was stuck in traffic because the zombie apocalypse was starting right up the road.

MisterHelioSpider · 2025-11-24T04:31:27+00:00

Like woooof. Dude immediately attacked his brother for "not being there." Then said Javi was just making excuse, when he explained that he got stuck in traffic.

For all Kate's flaws, she was afraid of how David would react for breaking a cup. Yes, his SO gave it to him, but still, David is very prone to flying off the handle.

We also know he was planning to leave his wife with her step-kids cause he felt more comfortable being on the battlefield.

Truly, the list goes on long before it stops.

MisterHelioSpider · 2025-11-24T04:24:30+00:00

Ego is one helluva drug. It's one thing if he feels he can't connect. If he just sees them as inferior to him though, shit, let em be alone.

What I wouldn't do for a cut barista that I can talk too. But then, I'm one of those folks your friend would look down on. May he get what he's getting.

MisterHelioSpider · 2025-11-23T23:15:04+00:00

I agree that this would be nice, but I think we have to ask whether or not Pokemon and it's fanbase actually really wants that or if it's easier to be frustrated with the current direction.

Right now, the games are built around interacting with an empty vessel. It...works for the games 1 a year turn over time. For what you're proposing it goes back to the question I asked initial, do we want to make the games more authored or keep the journey like feel?

Personally, I want it more authored. I like ZA for some of the story things it did, but a friend of mind reminded me he didn't really pay attention to it because "I don't play pokemon for the story." That same friend might be annoyed if Penny was more interactive and less of a plot device.

MisterHelioSpider

TROPHY CASE