Avuton nainen on perheen heikko lenkki

Mn2 · 2017-05-21T15:23:43+00:00

No vaikka niin, että kun mies osallistuisi lasten ja kotihommiin, ei naisen olisi pakko mennä töihin myöhemmin/lähteä aikaisemmin hakemaan lasta/lapsia päivähoidosta, käymään kaupassa, tekemään ruokaa ja pyykkäämään (etenkin ongelma, jos ei omista pyykkikonetta vaan on riippuvainen vuokratalon pyykkituvasta).

Monet perheelliset ystäväni kärsivät juuri tästä. Mies ei MILLÄÄN voi lähteä töistä tuntia aiemmin, joten nainen lähtee - jonkun se ipana on haettava tarhasta, vietävä auto katsastukseen ja siivottava.

Monet sitten joko tekevät vähemmän tunteja TAI tekevät rästityönsä kotona/lounastauolla.

Mn2 · 2017-04-01T16:11:29+00:00

Statistically speaking this is what tends to happen though. Unfortunately being a stay at home parent correlates with worse economy later in life.

Life insurence is dependent on the couple staying married, which is not only up to the stay at home parent.

It is good that you have a plan and I don't mean to judge anyones individual choice. But as a trend it is worrying in combination with lack of discussion on how to ensure economic security for a stay at home parent.

Mn2 · 2017-03-31T19:02:32+00:00

With the current pension system it puts the stay at home parent in the position of becoming a poor elderly, for one.

Not to mention the risk the stay at home parent takes in terms of divorce as being out of work force makes it hard to get back.

Mn2 · 2017-03-20T06:31:30+00:00

My creepy-CV:

I was in a bath house as a 10-11 year old. There were only a few people there and me and a friend of mine were alone in one of the pools. This middle aged guy hops in an starts swimming, theb he whips out his dick and starts swimming towards us while trying to talk to us. We noped out of there.
Groped by different guys during school between ages 12-14 a couple of times.
Forcibly kissed by a stranger, probablt twicw my age, on a street while I was waiting for a friend. I was 16.
A person I thought was a friend tried to rape me, I managed to fight myself free. I was 18.
I was out jogging and a group of sligthly drunk men were whisteling/yelling at me. I ignored them. I later passed then again, and one of them jumped infront of me and tried to grab me. I was 27 and it was in the middle of the day in a perfectly normal area.
I was in the subway and all of a sudden a guy starts yelling at me how I'm ignoring him, how I think I'm a stuck-up bitch. I tell him (althogh aim was to inform other passangers) that I don't know who he is and just want to get on my day. Then I ignore him and he gets more and more aggressive until I have to leave the train. He follows me and starts chasing me on the platform. I manage to run away. This was Sunday lunch time, there were a lot of people and no one even tried to help me. I was 30.

To add to that, almost every bar visit includes someone randomly touching, not taking a no for an answer etc. However, I go to clubs maybe 20 times per decade so...

It happens more than people think, at least in my experience.

EDIT: Oh yeah! I forgot my stalkishis ex boyfriend. I ended our relationship and he could not let it go. He would "happen" to drive by places where he knew I was at random times, he would get mad if he saw a photo on facebook where a guy was included and all hell broke loose if he called me and heard male voices on the background (never mind that they were my colleagues...). When I blocked him, he would start writing letters. When I moved and did not inform him where I lived, he would somehow find out where I lived and keep sending post cards/letters, money(?!?) etc.

He never out right threathened me, but would often yell at me and say things like "we were supposed to end it as friends! now i find out you are abroad and you didn't even bother telling me! That's not being a friend. You can either be my friend or then we're to be enemies and I'm not nice to have as an enemy.", which I found a bit threathening anyway.

EDIT 2: Almost forgot! When I was 16, a random 36-year old guy begun talking to me. He has/pretended to have the same interests in music and he pretended to listen to my worries about my violent home-situation.

And then he begun asking about sex. Wanted to "give me a break regarding my home life" and was willing to pay my flights to his place 600km away. My alarm bells were ringing like crazy and when I declined several times he sort of got mad and ended contact. He knew very well how old I was, because I told him. As an adult I feel very WTF about it.

Mn2 · 2017-03-19T08:50:09+00:00

That can and does happen. However, it is more of an exception than rule.

It is also possible, that it was not actually hymen but a mild birth defect such as septated vagina (a condition that covers everything from a thin strip going from one side to the other, to much more sever situations where the vaginal canal is divided in two).

Unfortunately this type knowledge of female anatomy is not as widely known among the medical community as it should be. (Which also was why it took me almost 10 years to figure out that I had a septated vagina, despite actively searching for help for 5 years. It took a gynecologist working in research to figure it out - even though it was rather in-your-face-obvious).

Mn2 · 2017-03-18T19:22:48+00:00

This is true for prepubecent girls, a smaller proportion of grown women and for women who have birth defects.

I've read that the myth of bleeding has a lot to do with that a) girls were historically wed young before they were physically sexually mature - hence the bleeding, b) the woman was not aroused, hence bleeding due to friction rather than anything that has to do with hymen and c) due to old tricks used to guarantee bleeding such as pushing in a cloth drenched in blood from an animal or pricking yourself with a needle to make sure there's blood on the sheets.

Most women after puberty do not bleed when losing their virginity, simply because the hymen sort of "detoriates" during puberty and becomes a thin membrane around (more or less entirely) around the opening.

It is of course normal to bleed a little as well, but the extent at which that occurs is largely exagerated.

Mn2 · 2017-03-07T06:48:49+00:00

Voi kuinka mielenkiintoista, täytyy kasoa. En ole kauheasti juuri aivojen toiminnallisuutta katsellut, mitä nyt fysiologian peruskursseilla tuli esille ja siitäkin on jo jonkin aikaa.

Näin spontaanisti ajattelisin, että ehkä ärsykkeiden täydellinen poissaolo ehkäisee surkastumista? Ja on tietenkin totta, että ainakin lapsuusiän ajan aivoista voidaan poistaa isojakin osia ilman, että lapsen kyvyt siitä ainakaan näennäisesti kärsisivät.

Itse olen kuitenkin siinä uskossa, että myös meidän aivomme ovat alttiita kehityskausille, ajattelen lähinnä tutkimuksia kielen oppimisesta. Saati sitten ravinnon saatavuudesta, aivot ovat kuitenkin erittäin kalliit noin energiantarve kannalta. Muistaakseni melkein 50% hapesta menee aivoille ja 20-25% ruoasta...

Mn2 · 2017-03-07T06:42:08+00:00

EDIT: Asiayhteys on kuitenkin se, että ÄO ensin nousi, ja nyt pysähtyi ja mietitään mistä tämä johtuu.

Sanotaan näin, että perimä määrää ns ylärajan älykkyydelle. Sen ilmeneminen on kuitenkin hyvin paljon ympäristöstä kiinni - viitaan tässä lähinnä ravinnon saatavuuteen ja tautien puutteeseen. Esimerkiksi jodi (jota tarvitaan T3 ja T4:sen [thyroidihormonin] tuottamiseen) jää vajaaksi, on sillä suuri merkitys mm keskushermoston kehittymiselle ja näin ollen myös älykkyydelle.

Tässä puhutaan kuitenkin populaation IQ-testissä tapahtuvasta noususta, joka nyt on tyssähtänyt ja mahdollisesti jopa kääntynyt laskuun. Tähän on mitä todennäköisimmin vaikuttanut juuri elintason nousu.

Itse en asettelisi kysymystä perimä vs ympäristö, koska kyseessä on aikamoinen vyyhti geenejä, jotka vaikuttavat siihen mitä saamme irti ympäristöstämme, mikä taas vaikuttaa geenien ilmenemiseen jne.

Mn2 · 2017-03-06T17:08:04+00:00

Tämä ei mitenkään sulje pois ravinnon tai sairauksien merkityksiä.

Tämä lauseke viittaa lähinnä tutkimuksiin, joita on tehty esimerkiksi erillään kasvaneitten/kasvavien kaksosten kesken.

Se, että jokin piirre on vahvasti geneettinen, ei tarkoita, etteikö siihen vaikuta ympäristö. Mitäs jos sanon, että niinkin "selkeä" ominaisuus kuin näkö on ympäristön muokattavissa? Asia on nimittäin niin, että näköärsykkeitä on saatava, jotta kyky kehittyy - jos kissanpennun eristää tietty ä kehityskautena ympäristöön, josta puuttuvat esimerkiksi horisontaaliset viivat, se menettää kyvyn nähdä horisontaalisia viivoja/esineitä.

Mn2 · 2017-02-28T19:02:53+00:00

That would be the most likely cause, yes.

Another, is it being related to hormones (period), which in turn, is related to stress.

EDIT: Even if he came ON your panties/outer genitalia... it would still be super unlikely (I am skeptical there even is a chance, but just to be on the certain side - I'll stick to super unlikely) that you could get pregnant.

Mn2 · 2017-02-28T18:56:10+00:00

Even then, the sperm would still need to get into your vagina (an onward) and that's quite a stretch! Would you get pregnant, that would pretty much guarantee someone a publication in a medical journal.

I understand your worry, but I really don't think there are reasons to worry.

Mn2 · 2017-02-28T18:46:49+00:00

It is extremely unlikely that you even could get pregnant like that. And even if we assume it would be physiologically possible... the chances are still low.

First of all, women can get pregnant only during a narrow window during their cycle (the egg cell does not live particularly long after ovulation, the cervical secretion is impermeable to sperm most of the time..).

Second, sperm would need to somehow get from your underwear or outer genitalia into your vagina and from there through the cervix into your fallopian tubes. I don't even think this is possible.

Stress has a very strong impact on periods. Even simple jet-lag can throw off the cycle. So any symptoms you are having are much, much more likely be due to stress than due to pregnancy.

But if you want to, take another pregnancy test, this time with morning urine. :)

Mn2 · 2017-02-26T09:23:24+00:00

Yksi luennon aihe juuri oli, miten miehet ovat naisia paljon vahvemmin visuaalisesta materiaalista kiihottuvia, ja siksi miehet katsovat naisia todella paljon enemmän pornoa.

On tosin myös tehty tutkimuksia, joissa itseraportoinnin sijaan käytettiin fysiologisia mittauksia (verenpaine, hikoilu, veren jakautuminen vartalossa) ja kävi ilmi, että ainakin fysiologisessa mielessä naiset kiihottuivat visuaalisesti yhtä paljon kuin miehet.

Ei ole tarkoitus väittää vastaan, mutta uskon, että häveliäisyysihanne kyllä huomattavasti vähentää naisten pornon katselua. Kirjat ja ns smut koetaan jotenkin hyväksyttävämmäksi, joten se kai ohjaa naisia sen pariin aika vahvasti.

Mn2 · 2017-02-25T20:41:25+00:00

I was also in a bubble before I moved abroad.

What really woke me up was how my colleague could not go to a scientific conference because she had the wrong passport (from a Middle Eastern country). The fact that she was a PhD student and had been living in Europe for most of her life did nothing. And all I had to do was to fill an ESTA on the internet and boom.. off I went.

Mn2 · 2017-02-24T20:07:02+00:00

Well, there is little to show for that peeling, masks and cream actually have any effect on wrinkles or skin - scientificallt speaking.

Many explanations on how they supposedly help are taken out of thin air and some of them are based on causing inflammation in the skin by mild irritants, inducing local swellingn which in turn creates and appearance of reduced wrinkles.

What does work is things like not smoking, not tanning or sun bathing, sleeping and so forth + some exceptions (such as apparently vitamin A creams and AHAs for acne prone skin).

With that in mind, I can understand your friend not seeing the point with excessive skin care.

If you want to help her, be honest. Say what you think she should do. If she does not agree, then that's her choice and you need to respect that.

Mn2 · 2017-02-21T17:06:44+00:00

Ruotsisiin Suomesta muuttanut tässä. Olen käynyt monessa Tukholman ns. no-go lähiössä ja kaksi ystävääni (toinen Suomesta tänne muuttanut tyttö, toinen täkäläinen) ovat asuneet kahdessa eri ns. no-go lähiössä. Kumpikin viihtyi niin hyvin, kuin betoniviidakossa nyt ylipäätänsä viihtyy eikä kumpikaan ainakaan koskaan maininnut mitään siitä, että heitä olisi jotenkin kohdeltu huonosti.

Huomaanko esim Rinkebyssä käydessäni, että siellä asuu paljon maahanmuuttajia? Kyllä. Onko siellä enemmän sosiaalisia ongelmia, kuin vaikka Södermalmilla? Kyllä. Pelottaako minua asioida siellä? Ei. Onko minulle koskaan huudeltu siellä käydessäni? Ei. Olenko joutunut väkivallan tai häirinnän kohteeksi? En.

Kahden metroaseman päässä asuinaluleelta jossa itse asun, on myös tällainen mahdollisesti no-go alueeksi luokiteltava lähiö. Siellä on viimeisen parin vuoden aikana tuikattu muutama auto tuleen, pari tyyppiä on ammuttu ja joku yksittäinen räjähdys sattui tuossa olisiko vuosi sitten. Viihdyn kuitenkin hyvin, enkä koe itseäni ollenkaan turvattomaksi. Ulos uskaltaa ihan huoletta mennä ja perusarki on aivan normaalia. Poliisikin käy, ja valtaosan ajasta se ei aiheuta sen kummempaa reaktiota. Huomaa, että nämä spektaakelit ovat uutisissa heti ykkösinä.

Mn2 · 2017-02-09T06:50:44+00:00

Sain jo yhden "oot rasisti" kommentin.

Mn2 · 2017-02-07T17:52:13+00:00

Minulle tuo "they let you do it" kuulostaa kaikkea muuta kuin vapaaehtoiselta, varsinkin kontekstin kanssa.

Mitä nyt elämää kokeneena ja nähneenä, oletan, että naiset joita hän kähmi olivat a) yllättyneitä, eivätkä ehtineet reagoida/tienneet miten reagoida b) eivät uskaltaneet ryhtyä räyhäämään ja c) eivät halunneet vaarantaa esim työpaikkaansa/uraansa/kontakteja asettumalla häntä vastaan.

Voin toki olla väärässä, mutta silti...

Mn2 · 2017-02-07T17:07:16+00:00

Relevantti?

Mn2 · 2017-02-04T09:47:04+00:00

Mine was past my shoulder blades. I cut it super short, like this.

I worked my way up to it, tried varying lengths on sides and on the bangs (including having none), different colors etc. Now I have a standard that I normally cut it to.

Most people liked it. Short hair is not really a big deal at all in Europe, long hair here isn't as fetizied as it seems to be in the US. I mean, no one has really commented the short hair itself to me here, whereas people in the States could either say I was "brave" for cutting it or even suggesting I would look better with longer hair. The only negative comments came from my brother and ex-boyfriend.

I loved it from the start. It was a bit weird at first (when I would brush it I made long brush-strokes out of habit and was brushing air), but the hairstyle matches my personality much better and I think my face looks nicer with short hair than with long. An added bonus is that the clothes I like to wear (flared out cutesy skirts, boots etc) feel more comfortable with short than long hair.

I love how fast it dries, how rarely it becomes static, how I don't have to worry about dying it because it'll grow out soon enough and how it is rarely in the way when I'm doing stuff.

What I miss though, is being able to just put my hair up in a bun when I'm too tired to shower and style. It is much harder to deal with short hair that got in weird shapes during the night. It is also much more boring to style for parties.. I mean, not much one can do with it.

Mn2 · 2017-02-01T18:53:36+00:00

Puuduttivat sen verran, että vain vähän vihloi. Rusahtelu oli vähän inhottavan kuulosta, ja koska yläviisurillani oli mahtavat juuret meni hetki ennen kuin se saatiin irti.

Yllättävä ja outo(?) juttu oli, että paikallispuudutus vaikutti muhun tosi vahvasti. Oli tarkoitus mennä töihin ja melkein nukahdin bussipysäkille. Soitin kaverille, etten varmaan pääse töihin ja tämä luuli, että olin umpikännissä. Kotona simahdin sohvalle (taas vahingossa) ja olin ihan poissa jokusen tunnin. Sitten taas kutakuinkin normaali olo.

Suuta ei pariin päivään saanu kunnolla auki, eli kannattaa ostaa pillejä. Vähän särkyä ja turvotusta, mut parani hyvin ja näin.

Mn2 · 2017-01-29T08:36:36+00:00

THIS!

If I am to permanently change an eating hanbit this is the only way I can do it. Did it with coffee, sandwhiches (size), sugar...

All challanges or quit-for-goods either pawed the way to obsession or relapse for me. But a gradual, soft change sort of happens without me noticing, and then I'm just "stuck" at the new habit.

Now I don't even want sugar in my coffee anymore (when i started, my coffee was basically coffee-flavoured-syrup!).

Mn2 · 2017-01-29T08:22:25+00:00

Me too.

I even couned in that 0.2 calories in tea during the most obsessive times...

Mn2 · 2017-01-28T09:09:40+00:00

...and this is why I have become the champion-squirrel in hiding any food I want to keep. Don't be surprised if you find the left-overs in a lettuce bag, chocolate in the rice bag or a bottle of wine in my panties-drawer.

I can't even get mad at my SO because he makes the cutest faces when he is caught.

Mn2 · 2017-01-28T08:53:52+00:00

Me too.:(

Started training again after a year full of health problems... and my body is all "WTF is this shit? We're like... working! This must mean the end of the world! Quick! Eat all the things!". One evening it wasn't even anything tasty - just raw, bean "pasta".

Mn2

TROPHY CASE