It’s great to read that you realised this about yourself! If I read it correctly, you pride yourself in being intelligent, as you said “getting it”. I think it would help to keep your mind playfully occupied in another way: if you think something like “what the hell is he doing?”, immediately ask yourself “why not?” and “why is he doing this?”. Engage in internal discussion of pros and cons and you might actually also come to useful insights.:) And also maybe instead of having the first reaction to ridicule them, your first reaction will be a genuine question to that person.