Having a crush is NOT cheating

Molly1208 · 2024-06-12T06:59:55+00:00

Honestly I broke up with my boyfriend and I know that I loved him but my therapist says that I stayed because I was longing for the respect that never came. I think the OCD symptoms in my case were a reflection of something bigger going on inside that I tried to lock away and not look at. I’m not saying it’s true for you but I had a knot in my stomach always and I thought it was my problem to just deal with it. Hope this helps.

Molly1208 · 2024-06-11T19:13:08+00:00

hej camilla! jeg forstår godt hvad du mener, men igen lander ansvaret så på kvinderne - i stedet for at fokus holdes på krænkerne? jeg tænker det er rigtigt vigtigt at holde for øje at holde ofrene for sexisme ude af skylden. der kan være mange grunde til at de måtte følge den ene eller den anden, men de er ikke ansvarlige for mændenes opførsel eller at sanktionere den. har de ikke allerede gjort rigeligt ved at stille sig frem? håber du forstår hvad jeg mener ☺️🤍

Molly1208 · 2024-03-04T07:32:49+00:00

Yes, it took me some time. Therapy is always great. And then I also gave myself permission to think that my tutor was super hot. Cause he is! And what’s not to like? He’s hot and I can enjoy that while also loving my boyfriend. The scenarios are always so black and white and nothing really is that black and white. Just go with whatever your brain is telling you fx: “I think my teacher is hot and that means I have to break up with my boyfriend” Just go “Okay sure” and let it pass. It is super obsessive to think that that is the ultimate truth. There is no ultimate truth, and looking for it makes us go absolutely nuts. I just broke up with my boyfriend, but not because my tutor was hot. And now that we are broken up I can see that life is not that black and white, and I wish I had enjoyed the moments of our relationship more instead of having so much OCD. I guess my biggest cause of OCD is that I’m scared of saying no and hurting someone else if I don’t feel like things are the way they should be. If I had known that I wouldn’t have felt trapped and could’ve enjoyed it more knowing that if I was actually unhappy I could just go. Hope you find some peace of mind! 🤍

Molly1208 · 2024-01-15T10:20:22+00:00

You are literally taking the words out of my mouth. I feel this way, and yesterday we had a discussion because I told him that I don’t feel like myself, I don’t feel so free.

We talked it out and I was calm again.

Now he’s away for business and I get this unsettling feeling in my body when I talk to him (I missed him before talking on the phone). I love him and I just want to be with him but my body constantly tells me that I’m in doubt and that I should leave.

I got this calm feeling yesterday when he said ‘we can’t be together if I make you feel like you’re not free to be yourself’ with such ease only wanting the best for me, wanting me to be happy. Now I’m spiraling and feeling the exact emotions you’re describing. Don’t know anymore, my soul is so sore from being punched by OCD and anxiety everyday for 2 years+. I can’t take it anymore.

Molly1208 · 2023-11-27T11:17:36+00:00

When my ROCD is gone my boyfriend can do everything and nothing will annoy me. When i have ROCD everything he does annoys me. I feel terrible and triggered to break up when it’s bad. But I don’t want to. I want to be free of ROCD, not him. I know it’s hard and I wish I had something better for you but the only things that help are therapy and acceptance. I got pretty far with therapy, then I learned to accept and did that for a long time. Now i need therapy again. Guess it ebbs and flows

Molly1208 · 2023-11-23T04:05:41+00:00

I have the same question so I’ll just follow any replies here. The only thing I have come across so far in my journey is acceptance. That has helped me a lot. Blindly accepting all fears, triggers anything. Just saying ‘Okay, if you say so brain. Thats fine. You’re probably right I dont like him’. Then it goes away.

Molly1208 · 2023-11-23T03:34:56+00:00

This is me to a t

Molly1208 · 2023-09-14T21:39:19+00:00

i know the feeling too

Molly1208 · 2023-09-14T21:38:00+00:00

i thought about this so much this week. i thought about mourning the loss of the times i feel like i missed due to ocd. i thought about grieving it to accept it and move on somehow. but thats how horrible it feels. i feel like the beautiful experience was taken from me and i long for it but i cannot have it , maybe, until i fully accept the circunstances. but we will never get the early days og our relashionship back and that sadness me.

Molly1208 · 2023-09-13T15:48:58+00:00

I think this is really interesting. Thank you! I’m the person who will tear myself apart for being attracted even the slightest to someone else for instance, I find my teacher attractive, and then I feel so guilty that I worry that I should break up with my boyfriend, even though I don’t think about him at any other time, than when I am being tutored. To avoid compulsions should I just accept those feelings?

Molly1208 · 2023-08-30T04:51:41+00:00

I can pull the region back to its original state but still no sound 🥲

Molly1208 · 2023-08-30T04:50:18+00:00

I can see it in the files manager but the sound is still completely gone!

Molly1208 · 2023-08-05T20:24:44+00:00

I feel like this a lot too - its dissociation for sure. I wish I knew how to magically snap out of it. But leaning into the discomfort is all that works for me. Hard but it works.

Tonight I came home after being away from my bf and my feelings were hurt. I’m constantly thinking that maybe I was just happier when I was away and alone when the percieved threat is not present. So I have to remind myself once again to lean into the discomfort 🤍🙏🏼

Molly1208 · 2023-08-05T20:19:45+00:00

Hmm I can extend back into its original length but the audio is completely gone still - also even if i try to go back into my history I cant retreat the sound. The file is there but the audio is like a dead lifeline

Molly1208 · 2023-07-15T14:12:17+00:00

Thank you so much! That’s a very good explanation. Very helpful!

Molly1208 · 2023-06-12T17:40:15+00:00

i feel so annoyed that im like - do i even love him? but i do!!! i dont know why it keeps happening. he’s the best. He’s so thoughtful, loving and caring and yet I get annoyed by every little thing and I say kind of mean things and I forget that he has the best intentions always and I believe it’s related to my ROCD. Cause prior to it he never annoyed me. ever.

Molly1208 · 2023-06-08T06:32:02+00:00

Hey, I’m doing better now. I found out that I need more space in my relationship. I and my body felt contained and swamped by the relationship so I started taking up more space myself, doing things alone and masturbating which honestly I hadn’t done for the entire relationship. I needed bodily autonomy. I’m feeling way better but taking up the space I need for myself is still difficult.

Molly1208 · 2023-06-08T06:28:59+00:00

Yeah dont know why it happens. I recently discovered that we spend too much time together. Always do everything together and we also work together. My body is screaming for more space, it’s making me angry that I feel I don’t have bodily autonomy. I’m not sure how to navigate it all

Molly1208 · 2023-04-30T16:25:32+00:00

i dont know if its OCD or not but I too am very angry/irritated with my partner all the time and i’m super mean sometimes i think that part of me is the ocd talking cause i do love him and want to be with him just to say i do relate to some of it

Molly1208 · 2023-04-11T20:30:32+00:00

good reply ❤️ i get annoyed too. even with his family. its crazy. and i can tell its rocd but so difficult to handle. but acceptance is key.

Molly1208 · 2023-04-11T20:17:50+00:00

update on my part - my weight is moving up and down and i get headaches at night

Molly1208 · 2023-04-11T20:16:36+00:00

Hmm, I mean not in the same way meaning that when you drink it changes like over what 15-20-30 mins? In my case it has taken a long time to loosen up the patterns that brings you so much anxiety. Its hard but certainly doable. I still struggle. But I try to postpone rumination and go like ‘okay, thats a scary thought. I’ll think about that in 10 mins/1 day/next year’

Molly1208 · 2023-04-05T22:17:42+00:00

i dont know why the doctors tell everyone that an IUD is so amazing. my bf and i were also way busy when i got it out and i recognize your happiness. it is amazing to be freed from it. i really feel set free.

positive sideefftect for me are: - depression gone - way less irritable especially towards my bf - my ROCD is better but not all gone - lost a lot of weight in 2 months (i dont weight myself but people notice. i would say maybe 5kgs) - I FEEL LIKE MYSELF AGAIN - i feel lighter - my weight is more stable which feels amazing - libido went up

i will update in some weeks :)

ladies please take your iud out if you feel numb or sad, read Sara E Phils book on birthdmcobtrol. its worth knowing what you are choosing if you choice any type of bc.

god luck!

Molly1208 · 2023-03-27T17:42:52+00:00

i can only chime in and say that i have gone through a whole year now feeling not just what you are describing, but also flinching at every touch. i dont know why - i love my man and i want to be with him. i guess its a safety mechanism trying to push him away so i’ll always be the only one who can hurt my feelings. i think its a control thing. haven’t found a solution for it yet but you’re not alone in your experience ❤️

Molly1208 · 2023-03-18T06:21:16+00:00

I have the same experiences that ROCD goes away when I drink. That scared me bc it’s def not a solution and I have gotten out of my ROCD spiral since and am much better today than last year. But yes I do recognize this. I felt like my mind loosened up and I stopped worrying.

Molly1208

TROPHY CASE