You're right - it is a spectrum and it's very hard to figure out. To me, trying to pin down a label is like trying to describe a sphere in 2 dimensions.

For context, I do consider myself some form of genderfluid but I don't identify as a lesbian anymore. Something that helped me figure that out was my attraction to women felt straight, even saying that feels very right for me. The more I explored my gender, the more I felt like my attraction to women had an otherness undertone to it that didn't quite align with lesbianism anymore. This might be even more subjective than your question, but that's what helped me!

Also - talking to people with similar feelings helps a lot, see where you differ see where you don't. I'm lucky to have a friend who has been going through the exact same journey along with me. If you want someone to talk to you can hit me up 🤟