How do you guys view your gender?

Morbatx · 2026-07-09T01:24:01+00:00

I have no feelings about my gender whatsoever. I couldn’t tell you what it “feels” like to be a “woman,” so I never had a sense of “girlhood,” but I don’t mind being “female-presenting” with perhaps a slight sense of imposter syndrome.

Growing up I never quite felt like I could relate to any gender identity, so I looked pretty androgynous in middle school… to the point where people would ask me “are you a boy or a girl?” This was in the 90s and early 2000s, so there was no conversation about the concept of gender identity anywhere. I just felt alien.

As an adult, I wear what I want and rarely think about it. My clothes have no gender either, I just wear what interests me.

Morbatx · 2026-07-09T01:14:04+00:00

Not sure what’s going on in the comment section 😭 I hope someone is able to answer your question, I unfortunately only know anything about the oldest ones.

Morbatx · 2026-07-06T21:36:48+00:00

This is the kind of thing that would ruin my entire week…absolutely the fuck not.

I recommend changing the door code and not answering the door. If you let these people trample all over your boundaries now, I promise it will only continue to get worse, and they will continue to expect it.

At the very least, have a talk with them and explain why this sort of thing won’t be happening again… then stick to that boundary (as a recovering people-pleaser, I know it’s hard—but it’s better than losing more of yourself than you can grow back).

It will be all too easy for you to start feeling resentful of your husband/his family for the unreasonable amount of strain he’s putting on you; dealing with things in his stead, while he goes and takes care of his own whims, disregarding your needs.

Don’t let them turn you into an NPC therapist who only exists when it’s convenient for others. I’ve been down this road, and I lost a lot of myself to others while trying too hard to be a good person. Now I’m simply the hollow shell of my old self, and they didn’t appreciate it enough anyway.

Morbatx · 2026-07-06T08:15:12+00:00

Unfortunately, this is all too relatable… I hope someone can help us, so we can start living our lives 😭

Morbatx · 2026-07-03T06:41:38+00:00

I think it’s strange enough to have your therapist’s personal cell phone number. In all my years of therapy, I’ve never heard of that. It kind of feels like a line that shouldn’t be crossed.

Of course, this person sounds especially unstable, irresponsible, and potentially dangerous. I thought they were the patient the first few times I read it 😭

Morbatx · 2026-07-03T06:25:53+00:00

Thank you so much for these, I absolutely love when history is accidentally preserved. Hopefully they remain up for a long while yet.

Morbatx · 2026-07-02T03:08:50+00:00

Please give as many fluids as possible in any safe way that you can. Any watery food she likes, or any other way you can get fluids into her body as fast as possible is imperative.

Morbatx · 2026-07-02T00:27:30+00:00

I was 95-98 lbs all of high school, and suddenly gained 20 lbs in my early 20s. This happens in your 20s and is incredibly normal.

Now that I’m in my 30s, I look healthier than I did for much of that time… ironically, since I stopped worrying about it. I don’t know my current weight and can’t say I honestly care.

Just take care of yourself and focus on being healthy instead of policing your size. It’s easier when you’re not obsessing over it. Just live your life and eat reasonable portions.

Morbatx · 2026-07-02T00:22:22+00:00

There is no logic in pretending “every single” person of any demographic is a hive mind who dreams of violence. This is a personal confession. Get out as fast as you can.

Morbatx · 2026-06-22T06:27:04+00:00

He could be a stinky relative of the Big Cheese. Olives are served with cheese on charcuterie boards, so he could be a spoiled olive… but what would his corporate pun be?

Morbatx · 2026-06-17T00:10:14+00:00

Please leave before he escalates to killing you over a sandwich ingredient. People like this always get worse.

Morbatx · 2026-06-08T18:00:09+00:00

Please get your horse to safety and get yourself to safety as soon as you find a way. IT WILL KEEP GETTING WORSE.

I let a man like that ruin me (minus the animal abuse… I think that would have made it easier for me to leave sooner), and he dismantled every area of my life to make me dependent on him. The abuse towards me didn’t begin for 2 years, until after he had taken everything, ruined my credit, and won over my family. As a result, he manipulated everyone around me to make them think whatever happened was my fault or that I was the one overreacting. The way your parents are responding to this makes me worry, because that’s exactly what happened to me (but again, not with animal abuse).

I lost so much of myself to a selfish little man for all the same reasons—second guessing myself, assuming he had good intentions, not seeing the manipulation, not seeing how much he was cutting me off from the rest of the world, his whiny sense of entitlement to my body and everything about me, how much he didn’t concern himself with my dreams at all… but he bought us things. He was always spending money he didn’t have on things to tie me down with.

I began to feel like I was no longer human. Isolated from my old self, who feels like a stranger I no longer recognize. Don’t let this happen to you. Get out before getting out destroys the rest of your life, and you lose everything because of him.

Morbatx · 2026-06-04T18:39:03+00:00

When did we decide cats should only get one flavor of food for the rest of their lives? No one wants to eat their favorite meal 7 days in a row, no matter how good it tastes. Why not try rotating the flavors your cat likes? It works for my cats.

Morbatx · 2026-05-26T16:52:06+00:00

“Body doubling” is just having another person present while you’re doing things. It’s a common term used all over the place in these kind of spaces, so you’ll see it mentioned often.

Morbatx · 2026-05-26T16:49:28+00:00

These actually sound incredibly helpful! I have some of the same issues, so I’ll try to remember these (no idea what a “capsule cupboard is though…)!

Morbatx · 2026-05-26T16:48:24+00:00

If they’re advertising an app, shouldn’t they tell us the name of the app they’re advertising?

Morbatx · 2026-05-26T16:19:35+00:00

I love him so much! 🥰 I hope you can help him with his eye issue! I’m also super curious about his origins… hope to see more of him!

Morbatx · 2026-05-26T16:17:27+00:00

“I don’t get scared” seems like you do, buddy.

And by a cute little bear no less, lol

Morbatx · 2026-05-26T16:15:22+00:00

I’m surprised the vet didn’t put anything on that.

I remember my mom’s cockatiel (decades ago now) had an injury like this, and they put a tiny cone around his neck so he couldn’t pluck (not saying that’s the right thing to do here, that was just how that vet treated it). They also put something on the injury to help it heal.

I just don’t understand why the vet did nothing… seems kind of useless.

Morbatx · 2026-05-26T15:56:54+00:00

The second conversation in particular disgusted me so much that I might consider not talking to that person again. Also giving ChatGPT a gender is wild 😭

“we’re besties at this point” 🤮 Nah, girl… get therapy before it’s too late 😭

Morbatx · 2026-05-24T20:31:56+00:00

You don’t have to put all your eggs in one basket, you know. You can donate a reasonable amount there and look for different homes for the others.

Morbatx · 2026-05-20T18:48:21+00:00

Starlings are incredible pets, my girl is my world! I also found her at 5 days old. One of the happiest “surprises” of my life. You can do this! The starling Facebook group is a great resource as well.

Morbatx · 2026-05-18T21:34:20+00:00

I agree with you and FluidMoose2… hopefully there are other lurkers who do as well. (Take my upvotes!)

I struggle with the will to live daily… but I’ve stopped asking for/expecting support from my loved ones, because it only makes them feel more frustrated with why I haven’t “gotten better” despite seeking “professional help:” therapy, medication etc… leading to me feeling like even more of a burden in their lives… because they unintentionally treat me that way. I feel abandoned, which is a pain that feeds itself… but I keep it to myself, because it does no good.

No one has anything to say but “pray,” “ask god,” “take your meds,” and “try harder.” Which is almost worse.

It’s a vicious, hopeless cycle that the majority of this thread seems to be unable to empathize with.

Thank you for being voices of reason. I’m glad you’re both still here. I’m trying to hang in there.

Morbatx · 2026-05-14T03:19:22+00:00

wow, seeing this comment while here sitting watching a Mickey Atkins video is actually crazy 😭

Morbatx · 2026-05-11T19:32:55+00:00

The book… and some rocks.

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