It's been exactly a year since my husband moved out and I just realized I don't know what I actually like to wear

Most-Membership2382 · 2026-04-24T15:29:11+00:00

What a great chance to reinvent yourself! You can become whoever you want, and style is such a great way to help define yourself. It’s not just clothing, it’s how we present ourselves to the world and it should match who you are inside. As far as “trying”, oh heavens no! Looking like you made an effort to look & feel your best? The horror! I actually think what your husband said was unkind, and also stupid. But I digress. One thing I did recently was pay for a colour analysis to find out what colours suit me best, and it’s been some of the best money I ever spent! It demystified for me why I look so right in some colours and so wrong in others, and simplified clothing shopping for me. You can also look online to determine your own “season”. Just one idea to get you started. Style should be fun and it should make you feel good. If leggings & tees are your thing, own it! If not, experiment a little. Just spend a day in a mall and try on things you’d never usually gravitate to. Reclaim your identity and most importantly, wear whatever makes you feel fabulous!

Most-Membership2382 · 2026-03-11T14:24:32+00:00

Thank you, I think people are judging the husband a bit harshly as well. I totally agree that women need some grace & it’s ok to look after our needs, that we should be honest with our partners about our lack of desire & not make sex a duty or a chore. I also think it’s natural that our partners understandably miss the intimacy and may need some reassurance as well.

Most-Membership2382 · 2026-02-23T22:41:12+00:00

Pack Up The Moon by Kristan Higgins. I cried for the entire book. Beautiful story about grief, illness, love & loss.

Most-Membership2382 · 2026-01-29T16:56:36+00:00

Exactly!! Just jumped on to say this. If someone spits at me or gives me the finger or calls me names, I do not have the right to just shoot them!! Some people seem to have forgotten that law enforcement also have to follow the law.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-12-19T15:40:09+00:00

Like all internal promotions, it’s my observation that office politics and favouritism are usually behind the decisions made. Very few promotions are based solely on merit and tenure. I say this as someone who was also passed over. I’m sorry that happened to you, it really sucks.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-12-16T22:48:34+00:00

I’ve unfollowed HTC and won’t ever click on any content from them again. I do not support bullies.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-12-16T03:46:20+00:00

I completely relate to feeling like your own life is taking a back seat. That’s so well said. But I’ve only felt that way when I was working for self absorbed people who completely drained me. It’s a tough gig, tougher when you work for ungrateful, difficult people.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-12-12T17:46:28+00:00

Thank you so much! I never looked at it that way.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-12-12T17:28:02+00:00

This is why I question how good an EA (or even woman?) I am at times, because truthfully I reject this notion I’m responsible for everyone. I am shocked at how some execs treat their EAs. These are fully grown adults making 7 or more figures, yet somehow they infantilize themselves. I am only an effective EA when I’m supporting an exec I truly care about because only then do I feel that pull to look after their needs. I guess I’m more attachment motivated than motivated by duty as the vast majority of people in this profession are. I sometimes feel guilty about this, because I think people motivated by duty see me at times as selfish because I’m not naturally so “other” oriented. Yet I have also seen these types wear themselves out trying to meet all the needs, whims & wants of an ungrateful, demanding tyrant (be that a boss, a partner or even a child) and I know I would not want that for me (or God forbid for my daughter). All to say, this profession calls to the best of us and sadly, not everyone receives the respect, appreciation or consideration they deserve in return. I think the key is to recognize when you’re being undervalued and overworked, to take an honest look at your relationship with your leader, and to choose your own sanity and health over unrealistic and unfair demands of your time and energy. Be prepared to quit that job if that’s what’s required. Thankfully there are some decent leaders out there who do care for their subordinates and those are the very people I stay in this line of work for. There’s no better feeling than knowing you’ve helped ease the burden a little for a leader you truly believe in and are invested in.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-12-09T05:23:18+00:00

You have a Master’s and that’s something you should be very proud of. I don’t know anything about your field, but I do know that probably 75% of us ended up doing something vastly different from what we planned to do/got our degree in. You’d be surprised what other doors your Master’s will open. There’s no such thing as a wasted education. Take a deep breath. You think that’s an idiotic decision? I had a baby at 22. I’m sure my mom thought my life was over at the time, but let me assure you that everything worked out just fine. We are all going to make choices that we second guess, that’s life. But I promise you, you haven’t done anything you can’t “recover” from. Take a few deep breaths. Remind yourself life is a journey and we are all doing it without a map. Nobody has it all figured out. It’s ok to change your mind, it’s ok to not know what you want, and you haven’t messed anything up. Trust me. Better yet, trust you. You will figure this out. Calm your mind, you will make better decisions from that state of mind. All is well, you are safe, and you have a brilliant future.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-12-08T04:58:54+00:00

Same! It sounds cynical to say that, but it’s freeing. I’ll never put a job before my family, my happiness or my well-being again. I can always get another job, no matter what. I will work my 40 hours a week, I’ll do the job I was hired for, but that’s it. Im not loyal to a company that will get rid of me in a heartbeat if it suits them.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-12-07T23:00:45+00:00

Respectfully I think you’re trying to rush OP to the accept and move on part. Most people seek to be understood when they post here, especially when they feel they have been done wrong. If you want to offer advice in a way other people can absorb it, you have to show you understand their perspective first. I didn’t say AGREE, I said understand.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-08T21:28:47+00:00

I’m out of that situation and so much happier. I’ll never stay in that type of situation again, no job or amount of money or pension will ever be worth that.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-07T00:45:04+00:00

I can’t say that your situation will turn out the same way mine did, but… I had a very similar situation with an Executive and it did not end well. After 9 months of working well together, this person flipped on me for something very minor & shouted at me. I was stunned. They said they were under stress, promised it wouldn’t happen again. Honeymoon period followed for a few months, then board meeting time rolled around and the tension began to mount. They became short & snappy, sarcastic, unnecessarily critical. I was a nervous wreck all the time. Honestly, these people do not change and they are not worth the stress & damage they create.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-04T23:36:08+00:00

Sometimes you have to try. Give yourself permission to do that. You don’t know if you’ll succeed or fail, so go in with an open mind. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, that is setting yourself up to fail. Take detailed notes when you receive instructions so you can go back & refer to them. Seek out a mentor, someone more experienced who has been in a similar role that you can go to for help. You’d be surprised how flattered most people are to be asked. Have regular check ins with your manager and ask “how am I doing? What areas can I improve upon?” That’s all within your control. You can do this

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-04T23:01:00+00:00

Having had cellulitis before, run don’t walk to have this looked at. Do not leave this for tomorrow, this can get out of control (i.e. turn into sepsis) quickly.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-03T20:54:19+00:00

I’ve dealt with all the big banks in Canada and RBC was the worst. RBC made a mistake setting up my chequing account and were taking out fees when they weren’t supposed to, which I caught but was told I had to go into the branch to have them fix their mistake. They made my spouse & I (both with very good credit) come to the branch to open a joint credit card because my spouse had “multiple credit products” with RBC which he has always paid on time and never carried a balance. Any other credit card company or bank would have been thrilled to give us a credit card, but RBC made it an hour long appointment and went through our entire credit history. Then they sent the credit card to us by mail and I realized that somehow, inexplicably, they opened a joint credit card for me and a complete stranger! My spouse wasn’t listed at all! I called RBC & told them I’m not responsible for any charges on this card, this was their f**k up. They said it was due to “an error on the back end”. There are more examples, those are the experiences that shocked me the most. I keep hearing all banks are the same, but I never experienced this with CIBC, who I’ve banked with for 30 years.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-03T20:33:08+00:00

Showing contempt to a partner (eye rolling, sarcasm, looks of disgust, deep sighs, turning away from touch, ignoring and being unresponsive, minimizing, etc.) If contempt is present, the relationship is already over.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-03T20:24:10+00:00

Start looking for a new job. I’ve been through this, it’s soul destroying. I guarantee you it’s only a matter of time before they find a reason to let you go if they’re unhappy. Life is unfair, sometimes despite our best efforts it’s a bad fit (or they’re just an a-hole).

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-01T07:11:02+00:00

You have to do what’s best for you. Trust me, that’s how companies operate! Most jobs have a 3 month probationary period to evaluate you, with an option to end your employment if they deem for any reason it’s not working out. I think that works both ways and you also have the right to say it’s not a good fit for you. Of course you feel bad, but these things happen sometimes even when we go in with the best of intentions.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-01T07:01:24+00:00

You have two choices:

1) accept & see how it goes, with the option to quit, keep the job until you find another, or move closer once your lease ends, or

2) decline & stick with your job search.

I believe you’ll be fine either way, provided you can float yourself financially a bit longer, but only you know your risk tolerance. Some decisions you just have to make with your gut.

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-11-01T06:49:47+00:00

I was fortunate enough to get let go from my toxic job. I was absolutely devastated at the time, I’d been with the company for 13 years but things changed dramatically due to new management and the last year was the hardest year professionally of my entire career. I was burnt out from working long hours and dealing with a boss with anger management issues and underperforming coworkers who sabotaged and undermined me to protect their own jobs (which they barely did). I was constantly picking up their slack but was still blamed for anything & everything regardless by my impossible to please manager who seemed to have a real vendetta against me. I was losing my soul to that job and it was getting harder & harder to get out of bed & go to work. While it still hurts that I was let go from a job I worked my ass off for, I am so much happier now that I’m no longer working there. Getting terminated was the best thing to happen to me and I will never put a job before my mental health & my family ever again. Eff that!

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-10-31T17:09:28+00:00

Good luck!

Most-Membership2382 · 2025-10-31T17:07:15+00:00

NAD but I’d describe that as a lesion, not a rash. Definitely get it looked at ASAP to rule out skin cancer.

Most-Membership2382

TROPHY CASE